Preemies

Newbie Preemie/ 1st time Mom

Hello Ladies,

My name is Vee, I'm a first time mom and my baby was born at 32 weeks (10/20/11). I had preeclamsia and did not know, so things escalated and due to a spike in blood pressure I had a seizure (thank God my DH is a light sleeper). They delivered my baby shortly after I came through it. I am trying to get back into the swing of things, but I am struggling to deal with leaving my baby in the NICU!

 I want to be with her all the time and I don't know proper NICU etiquette. I'm sure that I'm offending those nurses with all of my questions and scary thoughts. I just found out about a book on how to deal with being a NICU parent. I had no idea things like this existed. I'm just looking for advice and support. My baby was also very tiny, weighing in at 2lbs 11oz at birth. I am so anxious to start breastfeeding her and growing her to get her home.

Lilypie Premature Baby tickers image

Re: Newbie Preemie/ 1st time Mom

  • Being in the NICU is hard.  You don't ever get used to leaving your child.  As far as offending the nurses, I doubt that.  They are there to care for your LO and make sure your needs are met too.

    We had babies at a similar gestational age.  My guy weighed in at 2lb3oz.  

    This link might help you.

    FAQ: Resources for New NICU Moms  

    Born at 31w3d due to severe IUGR & Placental Insufficiency--2lbs 3ounces
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    We'll miss you sweet Debbie Girl (4.21.12) and sweet Cindy Girl (8.9.12)
    Lilypie Premature Baby tickers

  • First off congratulations on the birth of your daughter. As for how much time you spend in the NICU, I don't think there is a wrong or right answer to that. It's about what makes your comfortable, and if you can be with your child for long periods of time. Also remember that your going have to pump and rest up as much as you can. If your not pumping, I would ask the nurses to see if you can pump bed side. Maybe see if you can rent a hospital grade breast pump, to take home with you. Also ask as many question to your DD nurses. They are there to help you understand. I know lots of the ladies on this board have wonderful suggestion. Welcome and please ask away. You and your DD will be in my thoughts and prayers.
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  • Congratulations!
    I'm sorry you had pre-e, that must have been so scary for your and your DH. 
    There isn't really any such thing as NICU etiquette. She is your baby and you should be there as much or as little as you feel is necessary.
    Post here with any questions that may come up.
    Are you pumping a lot? That is important if you are planning to BF. Make sure you work with a lactation consultant. Preemies can be challenging to BF because they are so small and a LC will give you lots of suggestions that will help.
     
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  • First of all, congrats on your new little one! My DD weighed 2 lbs, 11 oz at birth also! She was born at 29 weeks and I also had pre-e. She was in the NICU for 8 weeks. So, I know what you're going through! It's a long (emotional) road. I didn't discover this board until after DD came home, I wish I had known about it before. Don't worry about getting on the nurses nerves or anything- I'm sure they don't mind one bit and it's what they are there for! They understand that you're just a concerned mommy. I think the more involved and hands on you are, the faster your baby may get to come home. (in some cases) Again congrats! and welcome!  I wish your LO a short, uneventful NICU stay. :)

     

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  • imagejcsntms06:
    First off congratulations on the birth of your daughter. As for how much time you spend in the NICU, I don't think there is a wrong or right answer to that. It's about what makes your comfortable, and if you can be with your child for long periods of time. Also remember that your going have to pump and rest up as much as you can. If your not pumping, I would ask the nurses to see if you can pump bed side. Maybe see if you can rent a hospital grade breast pump, to take home with you. Also ask as many question to your DD nurses. They are there to help you understand. I know lots of the ladies on this board have wonderful suggestion. Welcome and please ask away. You and your DD will be in my thoughts and prayers.

     

    Welcome! I was going to write out all of the above. Ask all your questions to the nurses, don't feel like you are in the way. You are your baby's biggest advocate because unlike the medical team, you are only watching one baby and you will notice things they don't. If you can, be there for rounds so you can talk to the doctors and be a part of the care plans. Ask questions, make suggestions, point things out, whatever you need to do. I kept a notebook and made notes each day so I could see progress and notice if there were patterns in any issues.

    I hope you have a short and uneventful NICU stay!

  • I was surprised to find a book, too - but even moreso a whole community! These ladies got me through it and we'll get you through it, too!

    Congratulations!!!

    The previous posters covered everything but I just wanted to say hello - and also give you a head's up that BF'ing might be a very long, hard journey. It was one of the few things that I had my heart set on while pg - my only plan. I think most of the ladies shared that - but we also shared the hardship of it. Please feel free to ask questions - whatever, pester away! We've all asked them plus dozens more ;) Biggest advice - if you want to BF -do not give up and pump like a maniac-

    <3

  • Congratulations on your little one!  I am in the same boat as you, my daughter was born last Friday (10/21) at 31w2d after I was diagnosed with severe Pre-Eclampsia Tuesday morning.  She weighed 3lb 6.5oz.  I too am struggling with having my daughter in the NICU and only getting to see her once a day during the week (I went home from the hospital on Tuesday and live 15-20 minutes away from the hospital).  I have heard that there are support groups for parents of kids in the NICU and I am looking into one in my area as I think that would be very helpful for me to talk to other moms who have gone through this, I definitely feel like I am going through PTSD from the whole experience, with Pre-E and now the NICU, and cannot wait for the day when I can bring my daughter home!
    Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
  • What is the name/author of the NICU book you found?  I would love to buy it as well!
    Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
  • Congrats on your LO and welcome! The first days are particularly overwhelming. I found it was a little better once I got into a routine. I spent 8-10 hours at my son's bedside with breaks to eat. Towards the end it was more like 12 hours. My son came home almost exclusively breastfeeding- some preemies struggle at it more than others, but do know that it is possible. We did skin to skin from the day after he was born on and started non-nutritive breastfeeding (putting him to the breast after pumping to let him start to practice latching) from 32w on. He started really getting something from the breast around 33w. Every baby is different and you'll learn to follow your LO's needs. GL, hope your NICU journey is smooth and sweet!
    BFP#1 9/14/10 (EDD 5/21/11); no fetal pole 6w6d, 7w4d, d&c 10/8
    BFP#2 3/16/11, beta 138; 4/12 Baby/HB DS born 9/10/11 at 29w4d due to partial abruption and PTL
    Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
    BFP#3 8/19/13 Another boy! 17P, modified bedrest and Nifedipine helped us have a termie! DS2 born 4/19/14 at 38w5d.
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  • Congrats! My LO stayed in the NICU/PCN for almost 4 weeks and it was excruciating! I didn't know about this board until right before DS came home. The ladies here are very supportive and thoughtful. A few things I found helpful when DS was in the hospital was to make myself some kind of daily routine that included when I would wake up in the a.m., the time I wanted to be to the hospital, when to run errands and cook dinner, etc. It helped make it through each day. Also, I allowed myself to be open to meeting and befriending other families in there, and even the nurses. I am still friends with one of the moms and we chat almost daily via Facebook, texting and phone calls about our boys and what is going on with them. I also kept in touch with my favorite nurse who has a 7 month old daughter. The worse thing people said to mesas "it will be over before you know it!", I hated that...but in the end it really was! I am now so wrapped up in caring for my DS now that he is home that I rarely think about our struggles in the beginning! I pray for a short and Uneventful time in the hospital for your DD!
    BabyFruit Ticker image Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
  • Thank you so much ladies! I am at the hospital twice a day and tonight I just had to stay home because I think I'm wearing myself out! I have been so stressed out about BFing and I don't know how to feel. My ob said that she went through the same thing and her milk didnt come in until the 3 wk mark. I was told by the LC that if I didnt get it in a couple of days, that it would never come in properly. I'm just trying not to be stressed cause I know that also affects my milk production. I am trying to also be careful b/c I'm still on blood pressure meds and it shoots up whenever I get agitated

    I want to be with the baby all day, but I know for my health I need to try and calm down. I'm also trying to connect with other NICU moms and preemie parents. It is so comforting to have others to talk to that understand what you're going through. I am happy to have found this forum as well. It's already been a blessing!

    Lilypie Premature Baby tickers image
  • I hope you don't mind my asking, but how did things go with you for BFing. Did your milk come in easily or did it take several weeks? The consultants are saying my baby isn't very interested in the breast at this point because she's always sleepy and never really wakes up for her feedings since she's still tube feed.
    Lilypie Premature Baby tickers image
  • That's a great idea, I had not thought about that. I will look into that tonight and find out what time that takes place so that I can be there. My tow wk driving ban will be lifted tomorrow and then I can get there w/o needing assistance.
    Lilypie Premature Baby tickers image
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