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What do you say to this?

My SIL was asking me who I thought our boys look like and I was saying that DS1 looks a lot like my little brother and that my parents said that DS2 looks a lot like me as a baby. After that she joked that maybe my DH isn't the father.

Call me crazy but I thought that was a little rude and really didn't know how to respond. We don't really hang out with DH's family as much as mine so we don't exactly have a close relationship or anything.

What do you say to a comment like this? Am I being too sensitive? I doubt I'll say anything to her about it but I think I'd be kind of pissed if she says it again.

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Logan - 11/09, Lander 08/11, Baby #3 ~It's a girl!!~ EDD: 04/10/14

Re: What do you say to this?

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    I think you're overreacting.
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    My family has a twisted sense of humor, so I wouldn't think anything of it... but that's just me. I know lots of people would be offended, so if you are say something. Def do if she says it again.
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    image+diana82+:
    I think you're overreacting.

    I suppose but I guess I was just caught off guard. Just wondering how someone else would respond to a comment like this from someone that you don't really hang out with that much.

     

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    Logan - 11/09, Lander 08/11, Baby #3 ~It's a girl!!~ EDD: 04/10/14

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    imageHope2Have:
    My family has a twisted sense of humor, so I wouldn't think anything of it... but that's just me. I know lots of people would be offended, so if you are say something. Def do if she says it again.

    Yea if it was my family I would have laughed with them but it just feels weird coming from someone that I really don't know that well. I don't care for DHs family so maybe I'm just annoyed because they annoy me to begin with. lol

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    Logan - 11/09, Lander 08/11, Baby #3 ~It's a girl!!~ EDD: 04/10/14

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    Everyone is different, but I sure find that comment creepy and offensive... ESPECIALLY if you don't know her that well or hang out with her that much.  I can't ever see my ILs making a comment like that.

    That said, while I would be offended, I think in your place I would just have responded by giving her an odd look and probably silence... I'd passively show my distaste, but it would feel awkward to me to get into an argument about something like that with a SIL that I rarely see. Since you didn't say anything and don't spend a lot of time with them, maybe just leave it at that.  But as someone else said, if you see her again and she continues to make those jokes, I do think you should speak up and ask her what the deal is. 

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    My SIL said something when LO was born that kinda pissed me off.  LO has a dimple in the exact same spot on his face where I have a dimple.  So, of course, he got that from me, his mother.  But no, my SIL says LO didn't get that from me.  He got the dimple from DH's mother.  ?! 
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    I think that's a tacky comment and I would have told her so but I am the type of person who pretty much says what I feel (that can be good or bad depending on the situation).  I don't think you're overreacting.  I would be offended too.
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    imagecaja04:

    Everyone is different, but I sure find that comment creepy and offensive... ESPECIALLY if you don't know her that well or hang out with her that much.  I can't ever see my ILs making a comment like that.

    That said, while I would be offended, I think in your place I would just have responded by giving her an odd look and probably silence... I'd passively show my distaste, but it would feel awkward to me to get into an argument about something like that with a SIL that I rarely see. Since you didn't say anything and don't spend a lot of time with them, maybe just leave it at that.  But as someone else said, if you see her again and she continues to make those jokes, I do think you should speak up and ask her what the deal is. 

    agree with all of this!

    *I have a similiar issue...My mom said from the min that my LO was born that she looked like me...my MIL said she looked like my husband. I left it at that..she was a day old!! well everytime we look at my baby pics (I have a baby album here at our home & my husband doesn't) I mention how she looks like me and I share with my family & his family via facebook..and they HAVE to say something like "no she doesn't ..blah blah" it just bothers ME that they can't accept she DOES look like me!! com'on now!! I'm her mom! its okay if she looks like me these days!! for example look at my siggy..that comparison is what started all these comments..I'm on the left @ 10months old. My LO is on the right 1 week ago when she turned 3 months. What do you think?

    sorry to ramble!!! I don't share this with my husband since in the end it doesn't matter who she REALLY looks like :) she's both of ours =) ...but she does look like me in that pic huh :) my SIL said no.

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    imageMOONGIRL2467:
    imagecaja04:

    Everyone is different, but I sure find that comment creepy and offensive... ESPECIALLY if you don't know her that well or hang out with her that much.  I can't ever see my ILs making a comment like that.

    That said, while I would be offended, I think in your place I would just have responded by giving her an odd look and probably silence... I'd passively show my distaste, but it would feel awkward to me to get into an argument about something like that with a SIL that I rarely see. Since you didn't say anything and don't spend a lot of time with them, maybe just leave it at that.  But as someone else said, if you see her again and she continues to make those jokes, I do think you should speak up and ask her what the deal is. 

    agree with all of this!

    *I have a similiar issue...My mom said from the min that my LO was born that she looked like me...my MIL said she looked like my husband. I left it at that..she was a day old!! well everytime we look at my baby pics (I have a baby album here at our home & my husband doesn't) I mention how she looks like me and I share with my family & his family via facebook..and they HAVE to say something like "no she doesn't ..blah blah" it just bothers ME that they can't accept she DOES look like me!! com'on now!! I'm her mom! its okay if she looks like me these days!! for example look at my siggy..that comparison is what started all these comments..I'm on the left @ 10months old. My LO is on the right 1 week ago when she turned 3 months. What do you think?

    sorry to ramble!!! I don't share this with my husband since in the end it doesn't matter who she REALLY looks like :) she's both of ours =) ...but she does look like me in that pic huh :) my SIL said no.

    well...except for the hair ofcourse. :)
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    I would laugh it off! 
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    imageMOONGIRL2467:
    imageMOONGIRL2467:
    imagecaja04:

    Everyone is different, but I sure find that comment creepy and offensive... ESPECIALLY if you don't know her that well or hang out with her that much.  I can't ever see my ILs making a comment like that.

    That said, while I would be offended, I think in your place I would just have responded by giving her an odd look and probably silence... I'd passively show my distaste, but it would feel awkward to me to get into an argument about something like that with a SIL that I rarely see. Since you didn't say anything and don't spend a lot of time with them, maybe just leave it at that.  But as someone else said, if you see her again and she continues to make those jokes, I do think you should speak up and ask her what the deal is. 

    agree with all of this!

    *I have a similiar issue...My mom said from the min that my LO was born that she looked like me...my MIL said she looked like my husband. I left it at that..she was a day old!! well everytime we look at my baby pics (I have a baby album here at our home & my husband doesn't) I mention how she looks like me and I share with my family & his family via facebook..and they HAVE to say something like "no she doesn't ..blah blah" it just bothers ME that they can't accept she DOES look like me!! com'on now!! I'm her mom! its okay if she looks like me these days!! for example look at my siggy..that comparison is what started all these comments..I'm on the left @ 10months old. My LO is on the right 1 week ago when she turned 3 months. What do you think?

    sorry to ramble!!! I don't share this with my husband since in the end it doesn't matter who she REALLY looks like :) she's both of ours =) ...but she does look like me in that pic huh :) my SIL said no.

    well...except for the hair ofcourse. :)

     

    BTW - she looks exactly like you!  :)

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    I wouldn't read too much into it. We have the same joke in our family with DS. He has blonde hair and neither my DH nor I have blonde hair. My husband jokes that he is not the father to strangers. haha. You should see some of the looks we get. Indifferent

     

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    thats what i thought! :) but only his mom & older sister (he has 3) think there are major differences!

     

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