Would you say something? (Gender roles, etc.)
shaindelr
member
Okay, we're in a Baby Sign Language class, and one set of parents is a lesbian couple, and one of the members of the couple is actually trans-gendered (used to be male). We live in a small town, and I think most people probably know this.
Today we learned signs for different toys and different clothing items. And when we learned the sign for "doll," the teacher said, "Not that Liam probably plays with dolls." And I just said, "Well, it would be okay if he did." (He's 6 months-old; it's not like he plays with much of anything right now.)
Then, all of the clothes the teacher brought were things her daughters had outgrown, and while we were learning signs for "socks," "shoes,"etc., she apologized for everything being pink and sparkly. Again, I said it was no big deal and just shrugged it off.
Should I just keep reinforcing in class that we're okay about not having traditional gender role things, or should I point out (privately, of course) to the teacher that she might be making it awkward for the couple I previously mentioned? I'm somewhat friends with the teacher outside of class, but I wasn't sure if that would be weird to mention it to her or not.
What would you do? TIA!
Mac and cheese lover!
Re: Would you say something? (Gender roles, etc.)
Uh yeah. Just chill out and enjoy the class. I would absolutely not point out another couple who are capable of speaking up for themselves.
As a lesbian and a big girl. I am more than capable of taking care of myself and sticking up for myself if need be.
It's very sweet of you to care about this couple and how it may make them feel but honestly I really wouldn't worry.
Thanks... I just felt awkward that the teacher kept reinforcing all of these gender roles, and I didn't know what to do.
Mac and cheese lover!
My one close trans-gendered friend loves all things traditionally "girly-" the more sparkly, the better, the brighter the color, the louder the lipstick, the girlier the girl (she's a lesbian now and all of her girlfriends have been uber-feminine), the better. So, I wouldn't make any assumptions at all about anything just because someone is in a same-sex couple and/or is transgendered.
So, to answer your question, no, I wouldn't say anything, unless it's make you uncomfortable about your own child.
ETA: I fired off the response before because dinner was on the stove and now I realize it didn't make a whole lot of sense. What I meant is said friend doesn't put any stock in what other people say about "gendered" things, is happy to do her own thing and wouldn't be offended by the situation you describe. I hope that made more sense?
Another vote for "don't stress about it" from another real live lesbian
sahm ~ toddler breastfeeder ~ cloth diaperer ~ baby wearer
two lesbians in one thread? Quick, someone steer this off the topic of princesses, sparkles and lipstick!
These. Don't fight other people's battles.
Oh thanks! Now if only I could update it once in a while...
sahm ~ toddler breastfeeder ~ cloth diaperer ~ baby wearer