How to ditch a 'stalker' mom???

cs1007

Okay, so she may not be a 'stalker', but this mom of one of the little boys in DS's playgroup calls me CONSTANTLY to do things. I know it is nice/flattering, but she calls 2-3 times a day to see what we are doing.

We have only hung out with them twice: once at a park, once at their house. She is nice enough, but not really 'my type'. She will call me in the morning, and then AGAIN in the afternoon. It is total overkill-I don't even talk to my best friend that much. It is awkward cause I have to see her every week at the library playgroup, where I have other mom friends...Her husband is home/around alot too and she has even tried to set things up for him and I and the kids without her. My husband is convinced they are crazy/swingers, lol.

Any advice? She is not getting the hint. Gosh...it feels like dating again!!! LOL

NativeNyer

I could have written this.  This SAHM neighbor is like that - she's VERY nice.  Her husband is a workaholic so she's always alone with her 3 1/2 yr old son.  I guess being at home with him is pretty lonely?  She waits for me to get home from work and calls to ask if my kids can come play.  I get home like at 6:30 and bedtime is at 8 pm - so it's not a lot of time.  We have to feed the kids and then put them to bed.  She doesn't seem to understand that I have to wake them up early for daycare.  She's constantly telling me how late she and he stay up, and that they sleep until about 10:30 am. 

I feel your pain.

Princess_Lily

I'm a SAHM.  Never would I call someone 2-3x per day.

In all honesty, she sounds like she could be either really bored (if thats even possible with toddlers), or lonely with with no one to talk to.  Maybe she's just calling you to speak to an adult about normal adult topics, is she mean or insulting you in anyway?  Or is she just calling too much?

I knew a girl who was a SAHM of two older boys.  After a few times hanging out, I noticed she was quite negative and insulting of me as a mother (rolling her eyes, saying that 'she's been there and done that')...but she was also quite lonely and would call everyday to talk and to gtg.  If she was a nice person to me, I wouldn't mind being friends with her.  But when she starts making underhanded comments - thats when I drew the line.  I didn't make any comments back, I just screened the calls and stopped picking up a lot...she got the hint.  I rather do call screenings than say anything - because you never know where you'll end up seeing them again. 

IMHO if you call her out on the calling to much, she may get embarrassed and totally shy away from talking to you again, it would leave for awkward conversations later in playgroup time.  Personally, I would just let the number go to VM...calling back at a later date when your comfortable, and just apologize for missing the call, you were busy with your LO. 

jenn_darrin1515

I agree with the pp that suggested screening your calls...then call back when its convenient and let her know you were busy...she should eventually get the hint...2-3 times a day is crazy!

LoveEeyore

I'd go in another direction.  I'd call her and set up a play date next week.  So call on a tues and invite her to do something on Monday.  Hopefully having a date set will help her chill out. 

KathrynMD

haven't you posted before about how lonely you are?

bluegirl8262

LoveEeyore:

I'd go in another direction.  I'd call her and set up a play date next week.  So call on a tues and invite her to do something on Monday.  Hopefully having a date set will help her chill out. 

Couldn't agree more! If she tries to get together in between now and then-just say you're busy but excited about the date set.

cs1007

Hahaha! Yes, good call, pp! I did actually post that I was lonely being a SAHM...but I also just found out I am pregnant, so I think I was being hormonal and sappy, lol!