Hi Ladies. Not sure what to title this post...

MissSunny42

So, I guess I will just start from here....

I am an egg donor, I have donated once before (to a family friend) and I have recently been matched with new intended parents. I was matched with them a few months ago and we were waiting for me to have my LO completely weaned before I started the cycle. So the IP's have been waiting patiently for about two months and I can only imagine how long those two months have seemed to them. I am so committed to them and I know that this process is very grueling so I have always tried to be as available as possible to the agency.

Anyway, today I found out that I have three ovarian cysts that may or may not need to be removed surgically (gyno said she would watch them closely) and she suggested that I not continue on with my plans to donate as it may stimulate the cysts to grow and rupture. I feel absolutely sick about backing out of my commitment to the IP's, I could cry thinking of the disappointment this woman will feel. I guess I am writing this because I can not talk to them personally, so I am hoping that maybe they frequent the bump or at least someone out there will take comfort in the fact that donors get their hearts invested in this too. I was truly looking forward to help another woman's dream come true.

I hope this is posted on the appropriate board and that it is recieved well. Not sure if this would upset someone or not....just kind of had to get it out...

Edwina.McDunnough

First off, thank you so much for being a donor!!

I would contact the program and let them know what is happening ASAP. As a recipient I would want to know about any delays as soon as possible, as a second donor may be presented that would be just as good. They may also be very open to waiting until your concerns are resolved. Also, the RE in charge of your case may have more assertive ideas on how to handle your situation that would be mutually satisfactory for you and the recipient. There may be options that your GYN may not be thinking of.

Good luck in your decision. 

theworms

Edwina.McDunnough:

First off, thank you so much for being a donor!!

I would contact the program and let them know what is happening ASAP. As a recipient I would want to know about any delays as soon as possible, as a second donor may be presented that would be just as good. They may also be very open to waiting until your concerns are resolved. Also, the RE in charge of your case may have more assertive ideas on how to handle your situation that would be mutually satisfactory for you and the recipient. There may be options that your GYN may not be thinking of.

Good luck in your decision. 

ditto this and 

another THANK YOU, your selflessness is amazing.

BeeBee08

Thank you for being an egg donor!

Mrs.McIrish

As the prior ladies said, thank you for being a donor.

I have only started recently looking at donor egg agencies and looking through profiles. If I had picked someone (not a light decision obviously), I would be crushed if the donor backed out. Even though you cannot talk to the IP, I would think you would be able to have your message/condolences expressed to them through the agency. Maybe they can/will wait for you if you still want to do it. Also, I don't know what type of cysts you have but a lot of them resolved themselves fairly quickly. Anyway, I do remember a post by a woman recently who was so upset when her donor backed out. Maybe you can write a note and the agency would give it to the family? I know I would feel better knowing you didn't want to back out etc. Worth a shot. GL to you.

abvernon

theworms:

Edwina.McDunnough:

First off, thank you so much for being a donor!!

I would contact the program and let them know what is happening ASAP. As a recipient I would want to know about any delays as soon as possible, as a second donor may be presented that would be just as good. They may also be very open to waiting until your concerns are resolved. Also, the RE in charge of your case may have more assertive ideas on how to handle your situation that would be mutually satisfactory for you and the recipient. There may be options that your GYN may not be thinking of.

Good luck in your decision. 

ditto this and 

another THANK YOU, your selflessness is amazing.

I agree.

Thank you so much for being an egg donor. 

DeputiesWife

Edwina.McDunnough:

First off, thank you so much for being a donor!!

I would contact the program and let them know what is happening ASAP. As a recipient I would want to know about any delays as soon as possible, as a second donor may be presented that would be just as good. They may also be very open to waiting until your concerns are resolved. Also, the RE in charge of your case may have more assertive ideas on how to handle your situation that would be mutually satisfactory for you and the recipient. There may be options that your GYN may not be thinking of.

Good luck in your decision. 

I agree with E - and THANK YOU for being a donor! 

Edwina.McDunnough

I also wanted to mention that you're not backing out so much as have a situation that is prohibitive to cycling. A very different thing than changing your mind. Don't beat yourself up for something you can't control. Most of us have had cysts and know how common they can be.

illinigal

Thank you for being a donor.  The fact that you are concerned about those IPs shows what a great person you are.  But, sometimes you have to take care of yourself first.  I know they will be disappointed, but you have to do what you have to do.  The other ladies are correct... sometimes cysts clear up and don't cause any problems.

km0426

Just wanted to say thank you for being a donor. It is an incredibly selfless thing to do.