Help! Sleeping, nursing (long - sorry!)
I typically lurked here before, but now that my son has arrived and is home from the special care nursery (he was 5 weeks early and is now 3 weeks today), I would really like to post more often. I think DH and I are very pro-AP, but we're having some big issues right now that I was hoping some of you ladies might be able to help with.
Currently, LO sleeps in a bassinet next to my side of the bed. Every night between about 1 or 2 and 4 or 5 for the past 2 weeks, he is completely inconsolable. I know he has his days and nights still confused probably, but is there any way to curb this at all? I change him, feed him, and hold him until I think he's asleep, but as soon as I put him down, he starts screaming. We've tried bedsharing but he still just screams unless I am physically holding him and not just laying next to him. You would think DH has started sleeping in the living room because he can't handle the lack of sleep (he gets up for work at 5:30), and I miss my husband. We're all going crazy, and I'm worried we won't last until he just 'grows out of it.' Am I just being a FTM and not realizing that this is totally normal? Even if it is normal, does anyone have any advice on how to help him figure out his days and nights?
Also, we've had issues BFing. I really, really want to EBF, but after 2 days being home from the hospital, LO flat out refused to nurse anymore. My supply is still really low because I couldn't nurse him right away (or even pump until 36 hours after he was born), and I know that's making it difficult for him. I've been pumping, but because of the low supply, I've also been having to supplement with formula. He's growing great according to the pediatrician, but I really want to get him back on the breast. For the past few days, I've been trying to make him nurse for awhile before giving him the bottle and he's making some headway, but I think my supply is still so low. Is there anything I can do besides taking fenugreek and pumping to help it along? I asked about this over on the breastfeeding board and was told basically to starve LO into submission (just refuse to give him bottles) in order to get him to nurse all the time, but I just don't feel right doing that to him.
On the upside, besides all of this frustration, LO love love loves to be worn around in my Moby. It's one of his favourite places...as soon as I put him in, he's out and even when he is awake in it, he just seems so happy. And I didn't think it was too hard to figure out either; although, I'd like to learn some different carries eventually.
Thanks for reading all of this if you got through it. Virtual cookies for you. 
BFP 02/04/2011;EDD 10/14/2011;Induced due to pre-e 09/07/2011;Jack born 09/08/2011
Re: Help! Sleeping, nursing (long - sorry!)
Lots and Lots of oatmeal, power pumping, mother's milk tea, some people have luck with brewer's yeast too. Find your local La Leche League and health department. Both of ours offer LC's and free advice for Breastfeeding.
babies cry. I know thats a horrible statement but it's true. DS was in the NICU for almost 2 weeks and it made it terrible when we got home. It really puts them on this crazy schedule and they go from constant stimulation to quiet and alone. We babywore a lot during the day to provide stimualation and we went out a lot. During the evening and at night we kept lights off and as quiet and calming as possible.
Does your LO have reflux? Is the bassinet inclined? DS cried like that because of his reflux. Is he pooping normal? If he's gassy you can bicycle his legs or massage his abdomen in a clockwise pattern (that helps get things moving through the intestines)
It's hard, it's really hard. I think the NICU makes it that much harder because for however long you can't be the mom 100% because of rules, regulations and protocol and all you want to do is be home with your baby. and then you get home with a baby who isn't a newborn anymore and has their own schedule and preferences that you didn't have time to learn and respond to.
ETA: Make sure you drink a lot of water, even if you think you drink enough I would say to drink even more.
did your hospital give you a snoedel or a lovie? Or you can go out and get one, use a piece of a t-shirt (maybe a 8/8 square) or a baby washcloth. Sleep with it in your bra for a few nights and then place it near baby during the night. It may help with the separation anxiety. You could also slep with a spare bassinet sheet for a few nigths and then just put it on the bassinet if you're worried about things in the crib with baby this little.
We had to sleep with the lights on for about a week. LO would cry as soon as we turned them off. We gradually replaced the overhead light with the closet and bathroom lights, and then just the closet light. Also for whatever reason, he slept better in the living room. I sometimes would sleep on the couch with him in the bassinet next to me.
I also reccomen La Leche League. I have had problems with bf and they were a big help.
Congratulations on your lo.
We had a few nights with our little guy when he would cry inconsolably and we couldn't tell that anything was wrong. Thankfully, it was ONLY a few times, and then subsided. I think that it was maybe just a developmental thing.
As far as the breastfeeding goes, it is true that the more you nurse, the more your breasts are stimulated to make milk (the baby is better than the pump). Also, pumping isn't necessarily an indication of how much milk you're making--your baby will always get more milk than even the best pump will. I agree with the water drinking, making sure you stay hydrated. Oatmeal is said to help, though I could never tell a real difference myself. I would suggest that you try nursing him first, and then if he seems like he wants more, offer a little formula. If you pump in-between sessions, it will continue to stimulate your breasts. Wearing your baby is also a great way to facilitate bonding, and it helps a lot with breastfeeding, too. If he's really into the Moby, you might try nursing in it, if you can get comfortable with it (I'm very large-chested, and nursing in a carrier was never comfy for me).
Good luck!