Need advice RE: FMLA & telling the boss

cecig

A quick backstory: the boss is mean, and I'm pretty sure she does not like me. We don't speak to each other unless absolutely necessary, in fact, it has been months since she has spoken to me. The last time she had any communication with me was when she emailed me in May to inform me that she was making me move offices

My FMLA paperwork arrived today, and I was informed that HR is sending her a copy via inter-office mail. So I am conflicted, should I approach her and let her know that I am pregnant, or let her find out via the FMLA forms she should be receiving? I feel like I am damned if I do, and damned if I don't.

Any insight is appreciated!

ImThisBabysMom

I honestly think YOU should go tell her. I understand you don't have a good relationship, but it is always good to be respectful of your boss. I hated my last boss, but every time I needed something or had a decision to make, I talked to her. When I quit, she said she really respected me for that and for my honesty. I'm not saying your boss will be that nice, but I think you should be up front with her.

sweetdreams2000

I would tell her directly.

Also, did you talk to your HR rep (mine is a diff person than the benefits/FMLA person)?  If I had a strained relationship with my mgr, I'd want HR to know so she doesnt pull any funny business.

TheOriginalSP

Tell her before the paperwork shows up.  Because if you don't tell her she's going to be more pissy than she already is.  It is hard telling your boss that you are pregnant!  I had major anxiety attacks both times I told them.  Although it was worse telling my boss that I wouldn't be returning after #2 was born.  I felt like the worst person in the world!

ScarlettDahlia

I think you should tell her. I understand your feelings, but I think it'd be better to just be open about it.

On a side note, they shouldn't be disclosing what the condition that you are seeking FMLA for is on the paperwork. The paperwork should be completely blank. Your boss should not know.

That's the way it works at my company. We have a few people with intermittent FMLA and my boss is unaware what the exact condition is unless the employee's tell her. They just have to say that the time off is FMLA related.

cecig

Thanks ladies, guess I'll suck it up and talk to her after work today.

 

ScarlettDahlia:

I think you should tell her. I understand your feelings, but I think it'd be better to just be open about it.

On a side note, they shouldn't be disclosing what the condition that you are seeking FMLA for is on the paperwork. The paperwork should be completely blank. Your boss should not know.

That's the way it works at my company. We have a few people with intermittent FMLA and my boss is unaware what the exact condition is unless the employee's tell her. They just have to say that the time off is FMLA related.

Thanks for letting me know about this, I had no idea!

MarxieVonTrapp

I was just talking to my sister about this and she had to tell her boss who hated her and was trying to get her fired.  Sister talked to her lawyer and the lawyer said that she should email her boss rather than call/speak in person about it.

Moneypenny424

Although it sounds like your boss is a jerk, you need to tell her in person.  Being unprofessional won't help your relationship with her.