Wine & pregnancy
devious1031
member
Let me start this with a disclaimer... I have never had a drink of any type of alcohol while pregnant, not with a single one of them., and even while trying (since Jan) the only time I would is during AF or a few days before I knew I'd be due to O.
SO, with that being said, how do you feel about having a glass of while while pregnant? I'm not against it, though IDK if I'm really "for" it, guess I'm somewhat middle ground. It started because while DH and I were talking this week about our anniversary plans (he gets home from this school/training mid-ish Oct, our anniversaries are Oct 28 (11yrs) and Oct 31 (9yrs) so we're planning on going away for the weekend of the 28th (Fri & Sat night to Denver). Well he brought up a nice dinner, a few bottles of wine (since I just, this yr, discovered a wine I actually like!), ect. I told him not so much on the wine and he said "Oh". That led to a glass a week or so being safe and possibly even "good for you" during pregnancy. So I figured I'd just throw it out there and see what others think. Also, if anyone knows, is it just red wine? The only wine I like that I've found is Moscato and that's not red.
Re: Wine & pregnancy
red wine is the only type of wine that has any health benefits (for your heart).
i dont care what others do. i wouldnt ever have any in first or second tri, but if i wanted one in third, or was celebrating a special occasion, i might. i havent with any of my other kids, but i think late in pregnancy, 1 glass wont hurt you.
I'm also a fan of Moscato, but I agree that it is red wine that has the health benefits. Personally, I don't have any desire for any alcohol any time soon. I might reconsider when the holidays get closer, but for now, I don't plan on drinking any time soon.
But TBH, I don't judge people who have a small glass or a sip here and there.
Micah Leonard
I am from the UK - been living here in the US for 4 years (today!!) and it is not such a taboo to have the odd glass of wine over there during pregnancy.
With DS the thought/smell of wine was not good until 16 weeks, at 16 weeks I had 1 to 2 glasses a week until 32 weeks, when once again I went off it!
DS is absolutely fine - he is developing great, he was a healthy 9lb2oz when he was born etc etc. However, I felt a lot of guilt after he was born and I panicked towards the end of my pregnancy as there was so much "alcohol is bad" pushed upon me and DH.
This pregnancy I have been craving beer - annoying to say the least as I have no intention of drinking anything in the first trimester, but if I fancy something after 16 weeks I will allow myself, probably only 1 a week though at the most and I will definitely have a glass at Thanksgiving and Christmas, just to be sociable, if nothing else!
(Please no flames - I have gone through my guilt and I know a lot of people out there do not agree with this! I would never drink hard alcohol. A friend of mine is a pediatrician and she had a glass a night throughout her pregnancy and her baby is absolutely fine.)
I think it's completely unacceptable and completely selfish to have any kind of alcohol during pregnancy. It's a very well known fact that any amount of alcohol during pregnancy can have negative effects on the pregnancy, so why risk it? It is really that great, that you can't go without for 9-10 months?
I've seen discussions like this before, and I was SHOCKED to read the amount of people that think it's okay to have a glass here and there. That is so repulsing. If you truly love your baby, then you shouldn't want to do anything that would put them at risk for development issues or delays.
We have been trying to have a baby for 5 years and are finally pregnant after 10+ IUI's and now IVF. I think some people just take their pregnancy for granted, and have the mindset that "it's not that big of a deal." NO, it IS a big deal. No amount of alcohol during pregnancy is acceptable. Period.
Konstantino
Maximo
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To each his own. I haven't had any alcohol since my BFP and don't plan on it, but I've heard of women getting the Ok from their doctors for a half a glass of wine once in a while late in the third trimester. I wouldn't judge them.
Once upon a time in history it was safer to drink beer than it was water, and we've continued on as a species.
Thanks for keeping this civil (for the most part)
To Aimes78, no flames at all hun! Part of the discussion between DH and I was how women in other countries who are encouraged and do have a few glasses during pregnancy actually have bigger, healthier babies! My SIL had her first in Germany (military) where, again, they're encouraged to have a glass every now and then, she did have a few towards the end of the pregnancy (half a glass with dinner) and her daughter was born 8 or 9lbs, perfectly healthy, compared to her 2 born here in the US, none of the more "lax" I guess you could say, German views and they were 5lbs 10ozs and 7lbs. If it's something that's worked for you no flames at all =0)
To TaylorandMel, I understand your anger about not being able to have children for whatever reason for as long as you did, but just because someone has different views on something does NOT mean they're taking their pregnancy for granted or that they don't care for or love their unborn child as much as you feel you do. Different people are raised and taught differently, as the above poster said, where she's from it's something rather common, and as I said, in Germany it's also very common. I don't think it's that someone CANT go without it for 9-10 months but if you have a better understanding of it as well as an understanding that having 1 glass is NOT a death sentence to your child then why not? I think you're judging WAY too harshly without understanding everyone's POV on this.
Thank you ladies, and as I said, I don't think that I ever would (especially now that I know it IS only red wine and there's no red wine I like, lol) but it's always nice to hear other people's views on it since I know we all do come from such different backgrounds, ect =0)
I live in the UK now and there's definitely a different attitude here than back in the states. Most women will have the odd glass of wine throughout their pregnancies and no one thinks anything of it. I haven't, right now almost everything makes me nauseous anyway but I still wouldn't feel comfortable. I don't see a problem with women having a half glass of wine here and there, but for me, I don't have a wonderful palette so there's not much point in my drinking unless we're having a night of it :-) I don't plan to drink while pregnant but if I really feel like taking a sip of wine to try at a friends or having a glass of champagne at NYE, I will do that and not feel guilty at all.
Right now though, the smell or thought of alcohol (or cigarettes!) makes me really, really sick so I guess my instincts are kicking in!
BFP Apr 2012, EDD Dec 19 2012 * twin h/b at 6wk, 9wk scan * Baby A lost at 12wks
Baby B was my rainbow born at 36wks on Nov 27 2012
There are several things here that need to be addressed. Number one, I don't care if it's common, in some areas or for some people. Just because it's common, doesn't make it right. In some areas, meth use is common. Should we get on board with that too? The fact that it's common, does not make it acceptable.
Second, my spouse and I are both nurses (working on masters/nursing practitioner). I/We are well educated on risks to the fetus with alcohol use and I've seen it first hand. I'm not judging anyone. I know the facts and they speak for themselves. You and anyone else can use whatever information they want to convince themselves that it's okay, that's your deal. I know it's not okay, and I would never say or agree that it is.
And finally, to correct your posting, I do not have anger about not being able to get pregnant sooner. Just saying that the waiting made us realize what a miracle it is. And I stand by saying that people who are willing to drink alcohol during pregnancy are taking their pregnancy for granted. If you truly love your children, child, or fetus, however you want to look at it, then you don't put them at risk for harm. So, that applies to this as, don't drink alcohol. Pretty plain and simple.
Indeed...thanks for that.
Does that mean women prior to the 1800's whose only safe beverage was alcohol loved their children any less? In the US we have developed a stigma towards it - visit most other countries in the world and this is not a huge concern as it is to women in this country, yet we have one of the highest infant mortality rates in developed countries. I think its worth considering that there is an "acceptable" amount - obviously being the town drunk isn't one of those.
This was me for sure.
Thank you for saying what I was thinking - I don't drink right now because I have absolutely no desire - but the human race survived pregnant women drinking since the invention of alcohol. Step back and take a breath.
Now, you can look at this lack of definitive info in two ways - a "it's not proven 100% to be safe so I will abstain", or "there is no definitive proof of it being harmful in small amounts, so in moderation it is fine".
my OB goes with the later - in fact he TOLD me to have a glass of wine in my 3rd trimester with DS (to help me relax, lol). He is very qualified...in fact he teaches obstetrics at Harvard med. I trust him to be up to date on current data. He also preaches moderation for everything - caffeine, etc. I know other OBs err on the side of conservatism - that's fine, too. But to claim that someone is "completely selfish" to have a glass of wine is ridiculous.
I never had any alcohol when pregnant with DS (I am not a big drinker no matter what), but the majority of my mom friends had a least a small glass once in their pregnancy, and if I decide I wan one this time I will have it.
I had two sips of wine last night b/c we were at a party at a winery, and I tried their house wine. I probably won't have another sip or two until a Christmas Eve party, and then again NYE I might have an ounce of champagne.
Third tri, I suppose I might have a tiny glass once a month if I'm absolutely craving it at home with dinner.
I will say that it just did not taste the same to me last night, so I was totally satisfied with just a sip. A glass did not sound appealing, and I was a huge wine drinker pre-pg.
There are some moms who abstain from any and everything that could possibly cause harm. Then there are other moms who do things in moderation. I don't think either type of mom loves their child anymore or less and to say otherwise is ignorant and wrong.
If you obsess over everything you'll go crazy. To each is own and I don't judge those who have a glass here and there.
This. 100%. My Harvard trained OB who still does research with the University, ok'd the occaisional 1/2 a glass of wine in second and third tri. He said there have been many recent studies showing that moderate wine use is FINE.
Here is a link to the most recent one:
https://news.discovery.com/human/alcohol-drinking-pregnant-women.html
All alcohol (in moderation, of course) is good for your heart! There are compounds in red wine that make it especially good, but the alcohol itself has some benefit, so pick your poison. lol
I haven't ruled out the possibility of a small glass here and there later on in my pregnancy, but not on a weekly basis or anything. Although I don't raise an eyebrow if someone else has a small drink a couple of times a week.
eta: and if I have a glass of wine at 33 weeks, it's not because I'm thinking "oh well, if anything happens to this one, I can just get KU again!" lol. That is ludicrous.
No, it's not.
Now they're saying all alcohol is good for the heart - it's the blood thinning aspect of it, kind of like aspirin. I had 2-3 oz of sparkling moscato on NYE with DD and same of Guinness on St Patty's. Those were the only times I took some for myself, but I'd also have a few sips of DH's beer if he had something I wanted to try. That only happened once or twice. I don't have anything the first half of the pregnancy, though.
I seem to get pregnant pretty easily, though, so I probably don't care as much about my babies as other women do.
https://www.americanpregnancy.org/pregnancyhealth/alcohol.html
https://www.cdc.gov/ncbddd/fasd/alcohol-use.html
https://www.marchofdimes.com/alcohol_indepth.html
https://www.webmd.com/baby/features/drinking-alcohol-during-pregnancy
This quote from WebMD was so direct and to the point, I just have to put it: "Because there are so many unknowns, the CDC, the U.S. Surgeon General, the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, and the American Academy of Pediatrics advise pregnant women not to drink alcohol at all."
Is that enough reliable sources for you? As I said, it is a well known fact that no amount of alcohol is safe and even a small amount can have negative effects on your pregnancy. You can do what you want, because it's your life, and it's your baby. I just didn't feel right without presenting the facts. I'm not going to argue with you or anyone else, it's all pretty black and white. Good luck to you!
I said it, and I stand behind it 100%. I don't have to know you, it's not about you. It's about protecting children from harm. That's what all of you who are for "having just a little" are misunderstanding.
If you're truly realizing how much you're blessed to be pregnant, and you're not taking your pregnancy for granted, then you would do EVERYTHING in your power to protect your baby. Since there are TONS of sources out there saying that no amount of alcohol is safe, you should not want to put your baby through that potential risk. Why is it worth the risk? Perhaps it's guilt you're feeling.
No, it's not the opposite. I said not to drink any alcohol because it's a well known fact that any amount CAN have negative effects. Meaning could or could not. So why risk it? They say not to because of all the unknowns. it's very similar. You're getting away from the main point, and your attempts at insults are juvenile at best.
I'm done with this topic. As I said in my previous post, do what you will. You're the one that has to live with your decisions, not I.
Your advice is the same, but your reasoning (and the part I disagreed with) is different. You claim it's well known that even small amounts can have a harmful effect. All of the articles discuss that it is not well known what effects small amounts might have on a developing fetus. Known =/= unknown.. get it?
Good luck with school.
Please point to where I attempted to call you name.
I guess you all are staying out of cars for the entire pregnancy, right? The chances of something happening in a car accident are significantly greater than in having a single glass of wine in the 3rd trimester. We don't want to take any risks, after all.
Whoa, holy judgmentalness.
I love red wine. I used to drink a glass of it a few nights a week and DH and I have probably close to 100 bottles of wine in our house teasing me right now. I haven't had a sip of it in over 2 months, and frankly I miss it.
If my doctor, who I trust implicitly (or else, he wouldn't be my doctor) says that it is okay to have an occasional small glass of red wine in 3rd tri, I will do that if I feel like it. It will make me happy and relaxed, which will make me a better pregnant woman. I certainly trust my doctor more than some stranger ranting on the internet. If someone shows me evidence that small amounts of alcohol is harmful, I won't drink it.
BTW, I also conceived my baby via IVF and this could very well be my only shot at having a biological child. I would do anything within my power to keep this baby safe and healthy - even if it meant standing on my head for 9 months. How dare you imply that women doing things that are approved by their physician love their child any less or will be a bad mother. Personally, I think people who are really judgmental are the ones that make bad parents.
To quote from the article posted below:
"The study, which found no evidence of harm from having a couple drinks a week during pregnancy, was so well done and its findings so conclusive that it ought to become the final word in the field, said Fred Bookstein, an applied statistician who studies fetal alcohol spectrum disorders at both the University of Washington, Seattle, and the University of Vienna.
"This is such a good study that it should shut down this line of research," said Boostein, who plans to refer people to the paper when they ask him about drinking during pregnancy, and hopes that research dollars can now go towards finding the effects of other, more troublesome chemicals."
I think we can all agree that she is pretty much crazy and that logic isn't really one of her strengths.
She is on the wrong side of the issue, and is just being inflammatory to try and support her weak cause. As a pp mentioned, she is going to be in biiiig trouble when all the other things a Mom is judged for crop up.