Ugh, apparently I'm a mean mommy

desabean

We have a pretty standard bedtime routine (pajamas, brush teeth, big bed for play time/ tickling/group hugs/etc., chair for a book or two and bed).  It's really a lot of fun.  Well tonight Garrison bit DH on the arm once we got in the big bed (she went through a biting phase at 18 months but hasn't done it in over 6 months it was totally out of the blue while we were having fun).  So we gave her the "no biting" schpeel and then I told her she needed to say she was sorry.  (I thought I had read somewhere that 2 year olds should say they are sorry.  She clearly looked remorseful but would not say she was sorry and even when I suggested she give daddy and hug and kiss she wouldn't.  We said if she didn't say she was sorry she would go straight to bed. She wouldn't so she did.....then I google how to get a 2 year old to say they are sorry and everything basically says they are too young. 

Ugh!  Tell me I'm not going to have to be on an Intervention or Hoarders episode (or whatever other insanity is on TV by the time she is of age) because of this.  We both feel so bad but she is now calm in bed so we can't undo it now.  I guess I'll just go buy her a pony tomorrow.

skoorbnibor

you arent a mean mommy. I tried to get E to say it at 2 as well, just to learn the behavior and now he is quick to apologize when he does something he isnt supposed to be doing. 

 

smilee

Get her a unicorn and she will not only forget, but go on to attend Harvard one day.

You are NOT a mean mommy.  I know I am not there yet in terms of age- but I hardly think that this is anything that she will even think about tomorrow.

YOu are a great mom.

ANd since I am just getting on here tonight, I feel like a total sh!t that I did not repsond to you on here about your dad.  I thought I had.

Forget you being a mean mom- I am a bad tttc sister.  

desabean

skoorbnibor:

you arent a mean mommy. I tried to get E to say it at 2 as well, just to learn the behavior and now he is quick to apologize when he does something he isnt supposed to be doing. 

 

Well hello there, lady!  Nice to "see" you.  Looks like you are having a fun summer.  Thanks.

sasa625

Being a toddler mommy is so hard!! I definitely don't think you've caused permanent damage. DD actually says sorry when she's done something she knows is wrong. She'll say "sorry mommy" and give me a hug and a kiss. So apparently 2 isn't always too young! (we didn't drill it into her either... we did suggest a hug and a kiss when she'd hurt someone, but never forced the "I'm sorry"... she started that on her own)

ShannonSky

hahahaha, don't worry about it. You have to stick with your guns, and I promise this won't scar her for life. FWIW, Ellie's not quite 2 and I've had her say sorry before, so you aren't totally out to lunch thinking it's possible.

desabean

smilee:

Get her a unicorn and she will not only forget, but go on to attend Harvard one day.

You are NOT a mean mommy.  I know I am not there yet in terms of age- but I hardly think that this is anything that she will even think about tomorrow.

YOu are a great mom.

ANd since I am just getting on here tonight, I feel like a total sh!t that I did not repsond to you on here about your dad.  I thought I had.

Forget you being a mean mom- I am a bad tttc sister.  

 

You are an amazing tttc sister.  You are such a HUGE support to me!!  I never actually posted on here that my Dad had died (in a post of it's own). I posted when he first got sick and everyone was awesome.  And then I posted about frustration about my IVF getting cancelled.  It was 2 weeks after he died and I mentioned it in the post (not in the subject) just because it added to how sh!tty the month had been.  Not many people responded at all to the post (which was totally fine) but Davez messaged me that night just to check in.  All of you who I am friends with on FB were kicka$$ during his last week and when he died.  I got so may truly caring responses.  And you of course have been amazing the entire time, always checking in, etc. 

I feel so bad that what I said in the Davez post came off like no one here supported me.  I feel incredibly loved and supported on this board.  Now how about that cupcake??

xoxoxo

Mouseygail

hmm..i would have thought to do the same thing!  (((HUGS)))

laura1

If you are mean, then I am a total witch.  Yesterday, I made my DS stay in time out until he was ready to say he was sorry to DD for throwing a toy truck at her head (it took quite a while...much longer than the 2 min for his age).

 And then, he was not settling down for his stories before nap, and I told him he had to sit nice and read with me or no books, so he went to bed without books.  

He may be in therapy when he is older, but now, he still loves me

LVBlvd

She is ruined forever. I'm talking...years of therapy. But in all seriousness, we do the same thing. The only thing that emerges is a battle of wills, which the two year old inevitably wins. So you aren't alone here. Two year olds are tough!!

dana316

I wouldn't lose one minute of sleep over it...and neither will she.

She'll wake up tomorrow, still thinking you are the rockstar of Mommies...

I'd have done the exact same thing...

 

Sara Scissors

I have these kind of "I totally just made the wrong decision" moments all the time.  And I worry all the time if I've now screwed him up forever.  We both know rationally we didn't, but I can't help those feelings.  I'm positive she'll have big hugs and kisses for you and DH in the morning!

Germanwife2b

Really, I think the important thing here is that you gave her a choice with a consequence and you followed through on it.  Regardless of what that choice was, you followed through on the consequence.  That is important and that is what she will remember.  And those are important lessons to learn even at the age of 2.  I really don't think you did anything wrong at all.  I just hate when people threaten their kid with something and then not follow through.  So for me, I say good job mama!