Transition from nap to "quiet time"?

crescentmoon99

Liam's either on some kind of nap strike or ready to drop his nap.  But he won't stay in his room for quiet time.  Right now, if I can't get him to sleep, he just hurls stuff at his door and tries to break his door down until I get him up.  This is not restful for either of us, and really has me about to lose my sanity during "nap" time.

He is only sleeping about 9.5 hours at night, that CAN'T be enough, can it?  Is this really all kids sleep at age 3, or is he just going through a phase?

Please tell me the nap is coming back!

How do I make him stay in his room for quiet time?  He does NOT like to play by himself, therefore he was really supposed to nap until kindergarten for my own sanity LOL.

akspriss

I could have written this myself!! Though my child will happily play by himself but when I try and enforce quiet time in the room he's so loud and calling for me constantly and we live in a small ranch so without a monitor i can hear him in every room in the house! I think our culprit is taking away the paci 2 weeks ago cuz I honestly think he still needs the nap but just cant settle himself so he doesnt try and nap. In the past 2 weeks we have gotten a few days of napping out of him and the funny thing it has been on days we dont really do anything in the mornings which is funny to me. The problem is that he's falling asleep some days that i get my stepson in carpool from school but thats not until almost 3:15 and i dont want those every day cuz it will mess with bedtime that we had to push up earlier with him having to get up earlier because of me working in the mornigns and him in school. i would be semi okay with quiet time vs. nap if he would actually be quiet in his room. Sometimes it makes me wish i'd never taken away the paci but there is no going back esp. since he's sleeping fine at night.

WendyNC

Camryn is pretty much done with napping and we haven't been all that successful (including my mom at her house) in enforcing quiet time in her own room. 

When we finally gave up on napping, she started going to bed 1.5 to 2 hours earlier than what she had been.

9.5 hours doesn't seem like enough to me.  Camryn usually goes to bed around 8:30 now and sleeps until about 8 pm.

Is putting him to bed earlier an option for you?

The whole transition is kinda rough.  We kept hanging on to the dream of the nap for a while, but finally gave up and honestly I was happy b/c I was sick of her being up until 10 pm!

crescentmoon99

Liam already goes to bed pretty early.  On a regular nap day, he's in bed by 8:15ish, asleep by 8:45ish.  If he doesn't nap, I put him down about 30 minutes earlier, and he might fall asleep by 8 or 8:15.  But either way, he's up by 6:30.  I hate to put him down any earlier, but maybe I should try?  I wish he would just sleep in!

akspriss

there is no way ill be able to get jack to go down any earlier then 8:15 in the evenings which is his new bedtime with our schedule changing cuz thats already a push for him and all his energy. I seriously am contemplating some days driving around in the car for a few minutes to make him groggy so he will take a nap cuz it seems to work when we go to carpool and i need to help him find some transition to no nap but i dont want to get attached to driving him around to crash for nap either.

NatPhoto09

I don't think Nic would go for quite time either.  He doesn't independent play and it would be disastrous.  How about letting him watch an hour show and can you relax during that time?  I know it is not the same though.  sorry about the nap strike (i hope that is all it is)

CarolinaDaisy

Liam is about the same age as my older DS. Quiet time is a daily issue here as well. However, my son stopped napping daily when our baby was born. For awhile it was hit or miss....now he naps maybe once a week. It's awful and I hate it!

But he does stay in his room for usually about an hour in the afternoon for quiet time. It isn't always quiet though....but I do get a break. I started out staying with him for about half of it reading quiet books, doing a few puzzles and then I phased out my playtime with him.

Now he has 'rest time', the baby naps and I usually try to rest myself. It's exhausting!

And we put him to bed between 7 and 7:30 and he sleeps until sometime between 6 & 7am. On the days he sleeps until 7, it's plenty of sleep. Other days, not quite, but I cannot make him nap. He just won't settle down. If he wakes up before 6am, it's mandatory nap and I lay down with him until he settles down or I drive around in the car and both boys fall asleep.

raceyrae

Can you try a short quiet time to get him used to it?  Maybe 30 min.  Maybe have him pick out something earlier in the day that he wants to save to play with during quiet time to get him excited about the concept.  My friend whose son is 6 mo. older than DD and Liam hasn't napped since he was 2.5 yr. old.  He's also not very good at quiet time -- she usually has him watch a show during that time or play independently in the room quietly near her.  But she sticks to it being our independent time so that she can get some things done and he gets better at playing independently.

Going to sleep by 8 and up at 6:30 a.m. isn't that bad, I don't think.  We had to move Natalie's bedtime earlier when she dropped her nap and she now goes to sleep by about 8 and usually wakes up at 7.  I have to get her up by 7:15 at the latest for school now.  Somedays she'll wake up earlier though (but she's much more grumpy on those days).  If you let him play in his bed for a little while, would he possibly fall back to sleep?  I know some days when she wakes up early, if I don't go up right away, she'll sometimes fall back to sleep.  We plan to get a clock soon for her room to teach her that we don't get up before 7 a.m.  She can play quietly in her bed if she wants but we're not coming up before 7 (unless it's an emergency of course) -- this might not work well once she shares a room with Claire though because she's still on an earlier wake schedule (usually by 6:30 a.m.).

crescentmoon99

So I just got Liam up from his hour of "quiet" time.  He came downstairs with me, and promptly passed out on my shoulder on the couch.  He'll probably doze like this for about 20 min, and be less of a bear for the rest of afternoon.  He's only made it to bedtime once without dozing somewhere, which makes me think he really still needs his nap.  So why is he fighting it so hard?

raceyrae

I should add that Natalie hates to play by herself, especially if I'm around.  If she's not in her room for quiet time, she pretty much wants me on the floor playing with her if I'm not doing something "important" like cleaning up or something.  I can't just sit and read a book while she plays.  To help break her of this, I've had to be firm about quiet time being her independent play time.  If we let her watch a movie instead, we still stick with doing something else while she watches even though she wants our undivided attention through the whole show.

raceyrae

crescentmoon99:

So I just got Liam up from his hour of "quiet" time.  He came downstairs with me, and promptly passed out on my shoulder on the couch.  He'll probably doze like this for about 20 min, and be less of a bear for the rest of afternoon.  He's only made it to bedtime once without dozing somewhere, which makes me think he really still needs his nap.  So why is he fighting it so hard?

I've heard of this happening with the transition.  Natalie has fallen asleep in the car or on her floor during quiet time a few times during the first month or so that she dropped her nap.  I'd try putting him to bed earlier during the transition (maybe 7:30).

Good luck!

crescentmoon99

raceyrae:

If you let him play in his bed for a little while, would he possibly fall back to sleep?

He doesn't play in his bed at all.  If he's in his room and awake, he's pounding on the door to his room, asking to come out.  Or throwing toys, unplugging his lamp, etc.

He did play some in his room today, but yelled to me the whole time what he was doing, talking to me like I was in there with him.

And now he's asleep on my shoulder here on the couch

jenhum

Maddie has been doing "quiet time" for a few months now, and we go through stages of it being good and bad. Maddie has quiet time from 2-4 every day. Most days, she plays in her room from about 2-3 and then sleeps from 3-4, and I have to wake her up at 4. If she falls asleep after 3, she's in a horrible mood for about 30 minutes after I wake her up, but then she's happy until bedtime.

Is there anyway you can reserve a special toy or maybe buy a new one that is only for quiet time play? Or maybe even take a portable dvd player in there and let him watch a movie? Maddie has actually never complained or tried to leave her room during quiet time, she likes it, but she has always been pretty good about playing independently. 

Our biggest issue is just that even though she doesn't try to come out, she's pretty loud for that first hour or so and tries to call me in there several times to bring her things or go potty. It's not very relaxing for me, although like I said, she usually does fall asleep in the 2nd hour. So we're trying to emphasize now that I'm not going to come in at all during naptime, and she can come out and get me if she has to go potty (she ALWAYS waits until the middle of rest time to go poop).

akspriss

oh rachel... i think our boys are calling each other up and scheming against nap time and us. Because not even a few minutes into our 1 mi trip to seans school to pick him up in carpool he was sound asleep, and then upon arriving home let me transfer him to his bed where I let him take a short nap cuz he needs it obivously. I hope these boys figure this out soon and by figure it out I mean start napping

crescentmoon99

akspriss:

oh rachel... i think our boys are calling each other up and scheming against nap time and us. Because not even a few minutes into our 1 mi trip to seans school to pick him up in carpool he was sound asleep, and then upon arriving home let me transfer him to his bed where I let him take a short nap cuz he needs it obivously. I hope these boys figure this out soon and by figure it out I mean start napping

For real!  Liam napped for 45 min on the couch....that is a couch napping record for him!  Obviously he was exhausted (an hour is a regular nap for him).

On Sunday, when DH put him down, he went straight to sleep and slept for 2 hours!  It's like he is just doing this to torture me.

I think I will keep trying to put him down for naps for another week or 2, in hopes that it's a phase, especially with school starting back up next week.  He just seems soooo exhausted and miserable on days he doesn't nap!  If they're ready to drop their nap, they should be fine without it right?

Thanks everyone for your suggestions!  I have a feeling this is the beginning of a long struggle for us

sms297

I know I am never ever on her anymore but I happened to have a few minutes and jumped on here.

I have a few suggestions to transition into quiet time. I think sometimes it is hard for them because they don't understand how long an hour or however long you want them them to be quiet is. I have many times thought about getting a toddler alarm clock like this...

https://www.amazon.com/American-Innovative-Teach-Talking-Nightlight/dp/B003D7KV0Q/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1314822557&sr=8-1

You can set it to change colors when quiet time is over.

Have you thought of going to the library to  get him a special bunch of books that are for quiet time only. Or pulling out some toys that he hasn't seen in a while that just go in his room. 

Oh & FYI I know of several people that use that clock to KEEP kids in their bed in the morning. They can't get out till it turns green.

 Good luck! It can be so frustrating when they are so tired but won't nap!

 

MrsJones2005

I like SMS's idea of the alarm clock.  We did something like this for the girls when we lived in Wilmington and if I could remember were we put the clock when we moved here last year I would pull it back out.  Although, we just used a cheap clock from walmart...we removed the cover, put a flower sticker on the hour hand and then put a a soccer ball sticker by the 3 and a sunshine (i think) by the 7.  They knew that nap time/quiet time was over when the flower pointed to the soccer ball.  They knew that they could get out of bed in the morning when the flower pointed to the sunshine.  They picked up on the concept very quickly, and they were 3.  Now that I'm thinking about it for you...I think I'm going to just get another clock and do this again.  That way maybe they'll stay in bed past 630!

jenn&tim05

Im super late on this too and hardly ever on but we have been having trouble as well. Although he still naps 3 out of 4 days at school so it isnt a huge issue for us, but on the weekends or vacation it can be.

This may not be for everyone but I have started sitting in the room with him. No toys, no distractions, no moving and hes out in aobut 10 min. If i leave him alone he'll play forever......and wont nap so i just save us all the trouble and sit in there till hes asleep....meaning I get my 1.5 to 2hrs of relaxing. Just something to try. GL!

crescentmoon99

Thank you ladies for all of your helpful suggestions.  The day after I posted this, Liam started napping again, but he's now started having trouble falling asleep, messing around and calling me back up for an hour or so at bedtime, which has never happened before, so I think we are approaching the end of nap time regardless.

sms - thanks for the clock recommendation.  I just ordered it from Amazon.  I showed it to Liam and he liked the idea of a clock in there for quiet time that will turn green when it's time for him to come out.

We're probably going to move to quiet time next week or so when the clock arrives.  We're going to take out Liam's glider and move his little table and chairs into his room, so that he'll have a place to sit and do stuff.  We're going to spend the next week or so talking it up and how quiet time will work and what the rules are. Wish me luck LOL.