potty training at daycare--HELP — The Bump
D.C. Area Babies

potty training at daycare--HELP

J just moved up (well, he's transitioning this week) to the next class up at daycare. His first day went pretty well, but the director said that generally the first month or two is tough because the schedule is a little different (later lunch, more "responsibilities" like cleaning up, etc.).

She also said, however, that he has been wetting less frequently in the last few weeks and they think he's ready to start potty training. They want me to bring in pull-ups and extra changes of clothes so that they can start training him. She actually said she hopes to have him trained by mid-October!

So I have a few questions/concerns:

  1. This seems like a lot of change all at once, especially in light of her comment about the transition.
  2. I *kind* of get the feeling that they just don't feel like dealing with him in diapers, since I'm guessing a lot of the other kids in the class (they're all 2-3) are probably potty trained. Might they be rushing it? We cloth diaper, and I also wonder if they might just not want to deal with those, either.
  3. What are these pull-up things? Do they make them in cloth? Her main concern was that he be able to pull them up and down by himself.

It's also possible that I'm just a little worked up because my little guy is going to be 2 this week, which according to him means he will be a "big boy." Ack! Where did my baby go?

(On the other hand, I do realize how awesome it would be if they potty trained him for me, because this is the one aspect of parenthood I really haven't researched all that much.)

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Re: potty training at daycare--HELP

  • peer pressure is a wonderful thing so it's possible watching the 3 y.o. pee will help to potty train. Or not

    in our DC, kids must wear pull-ups if they go to the bathroom (tiny little toilets, so cute) so even though they are glorified diapers and cost 2x as much, it's the rule. I have no idea if they make them in cloth but if you think it's too much, why not wait a few weeks and then start PTing.

    the thing with the 2-3 y.o. room is that when PTing they take them to the potty all the time, as in every hour or so, and it's a huge PITA for the teachers. Our DCP is every 6mo, so it's 24-30mo and then 30-36mo and they go thru teachers like crazy b/c a lot of them can't handle constantly putting kids on the potty, all.day.long

    happy almost b-day to J!!

     

  • I am trying to wrap my head around this only because I'm having 100% the opposite problem, which is we are trying to potty train my DD #2 for her to start her preschool (next week) for which she has to be potty trained (they don't change diapers).  And my in-home lady is not reinforcing enough for our comfort, and so DD #2 is 100% trained at home and anywhere that is not DC, but still has accidents at DC - which mystifies me and aggravates me.  And in a weird way I think it's actually EASIER to deal with kids in diapers than deal with kids who are potty training - because it's less mess.

    I say this with love - but this is me taking you by the shoulders and saying "why would you resist DC helping you potty train?"  Tongue Tied 

    Unless, of course, you truly think your LO is not ready - in which case I could see the resistance.  But again - (shaking you ever so gently) - they are offering to help potty train - that is a good thing! 

    Unless he's not ready - and you know him best...better than they do - do you think he's not ready?.

    (potty training is a LOT of work, and the fact that they want to work with you....unless he's truly not ready....)

    Wife, Musician, Fed, WW-er, and Mom of three little kids - not necessarily in that order.
  • My DD was ready to start potty training just before two after we spent the weekend with a friend and her 2 year old who was potty training. I wanted to wait a bit, but once she moved into the 2 room at school she was ready. Like pp mentioned, peer pressure helps! She was eager to do what her new friends were doing. We didn't use pull up and used Gerber cloth potty training pants http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B004KAARSQ/ref=pd_lpo_k2_dp_sr_1?pf_rd_p=486539851&pf_rd_s=lpo-top-stripe-1&pf_rd_t=201&pf_rd_i=B003BIFOKO&pf_rd_m=ATVPDKIKX0DER&pf_rd_r=0N4BB0PS1Q7W8F9MB1BG

    Not sure if your DCP will be open to using these over pull ups. They're easier for DD to pull off/on and more absorbant than regular underware. Personally, I would hold off on PTing until your child was settled into the new room. However, if he's ready to go then why not give it a try and see how he does. Good luck!

  • I think I'd be a little hesitant because it sounds like something your DCP just automatically wants to do when the kids move into this room, not that she's specifically noticed that your DS is showing signs he's ready. Unless you were already thinking he's ready, I would at least want to wait until he's settled into the new room and until the new teacher has a chance to get to know him and to develop an opinion of whether he's ready.

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  • Just one more thought - the thing about potty training is - once you attempt it - it becomes fairly obivous if LO is ready or not.  So if you're on the fence, I'd try it, let them try it - if it's not working, then you put your foot down and say "no - he's not ready, let's not push him."  But there if there is a possibility he is ready, maybe this will be the jump start he needs.

    Is he ready?  What do you think?  Gut feeling?

    Wife, Musician, Fed, WW-er, and Mom of three little kids - not necessarily in that order.
  • Dear T&C,

    Ugh. Blah. I can't speak to your situation. I will say that I saw these cloth diaper training pants when I was researching which CDs I wanted to order for my daughter. I didn't check out the price when I pulled the link right now, but I think I remember them being kind of expensive.

    ETA: I just checked the site of a local place where I added to my stash in Roanoke. Saw these and like the idea of them too.

    Train pain,

    kewliegirl

    image image image
  • I would totally let them try. DCP was the first person to put C on the potty and I am eternally grateful because I had no idea how to even start the process. And, that was like 8 months ago. He is still not potty trained by any stretch of the imagination. We're taking it slow and figure he has time to figure it out.

    Just because they try, doesn't mean it will actually happen any time soon. Like Artslvr said, if he's not ready, he's not ready.

    And Happy Heiny's has a pull up, but I've grown to hate the HHs in our current stash, so I'm hoping we go straight from CDs to training pants or undies (just purchase our first set of undies this past weekend!).

  • image Artslvr:

    Just one more thought - the thing about potty training is - once you attempt it - it becomes fairly obivous if LO is ready or not.  So if you're on the fence, I'd try it, let them try it - if it's not working, then you put your foot down and say "no - he's not ready, let's not push him."  But there if there is a possibility he is ready, maybe this will be the jump start he needs.

    Is he ready?  What do you think?  Gut feeling?

    Yeah, gut feeling is he's not ready. We've had a potty in the house for a few months (bought it when he was showing some interest) and he is not into it at all. Won't sit on it for more than about five seconds, and has never actually used it as it was intended. 

    LMH, I agree--I think they must start all the kids on this process when they move into this room regardless of "readiness." On the one hand, I totally understand wanting to have them all potty trained since it would be a pain to change all those diapers, but I still feel like it's a leeetle too early. I'm going to talk to my DCP again tomorrow and see if we can push it back just a little (until after this initial transition period).

    Kewlie - thanks for the cloth pant links! Time to do some research.

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  • image tomandcourt:
    image Artslvr:

    Just one more thought - the thing about potty training is - once you attempt it - it becomes fairly obivous if LO is ready or not.  So if you're on the fence, I'd try it, let them try it - if it's not working, then you put your foot down and say "no - he's not ready, let's not push him."  But there if there is a possibility he is ready, maybe this will be the jump start he needs.

    Is he ready?  What do you think?  Gut feeling?

    Yeah, gut feeling is he's not ready. We've had a potty in the house for a few months (bought it when he was showing some interest) and he is not into it at all. Won't sit on it for more than about five seconds, and has never actually used it as it was intended. 

    LMH, I agree--I think they must start all the kids on this process when they move into this room regardless of "readiness." On the one hand, I totally understand wanting to have them all potty trained since it would be a pain to change all those diapers, but I still feel like it's a leeetle too early. I'm going to talk to my DCP again tomorrow and see if we can push it back just a little (until after this initial transition period).

    Kewlie - thanks for the cloth pant links! Time to do some research.

    Take this with a grain of salt as I know next to nothing about potty training...

    but what if you let him try to pee standing up at the regular toilet instead of a potty chair? Maybe have him watch your DH a few times to get the hang of it, and then tell him how much fun it is to pee like Daddy standing up.  This totally worked for DS and he's very much into peeing standing up and we go through far less diapers now.  Granted, he still doesn't tell us when he needs to pee, but we just give him the opportunity on a regular basis.  

    [IMG]http://i45.tinypic.com/25717di.jpg[/IMG]
  • image tomandcourt:
    image Artslvr:

    Just one more thought - the thing about potty training is - once you attempt it - it becomes fairly obivous if LO is ready or not.  So if you're on the fence, I'd try it, let them try it - if it's not working, then you put your foot down and say "no - he's not ready, let's not push him."  But there if there is a possibility he is ready, maybe this will be the jump start he needs.

    Is he ready?  What do you think?  Gut feeling?

    Yeah, gut feeling is he's not ready. We've had a potty in the house for a few months (bought it when he was showing some interest) and he is not into it at all. Won't sit on it for more than about five seconds, and has never actually used it as it was intended. 

    LMH, I agree--I think they must start all the kids on this process when they move into this room regardless of "readiness." On the one hand, I totally understand wanting to have them all potty trained since it would be a pain to change all those diapers, but I still feel like it's a leeetle too early. I'm going to talk to my DCP again tomorrow and see if we can push it back just a little (until after this initial transition period).

    Kewlie - thanks for the cloth pant links! Time to do some research.

     

    Gut feelings are good things to follow, but just as food for thought (and this is obviously dependent on your kid), but sometimes doing several transitions at once is not a bad thing.  Kind of like ripping the band aid off;)  Your little guy might surprise you.  Overall, I have to side with Artslvr on her original comment--why not try and see how it goes.  I do think potty training is one of those things that if they are not ready, it will be pretty immediately obvious.  But how beautiful would it be if it works?!?  Big Smile

     

  • image Artslvr:

    I am trying to wrap my head around this only because I'm having 100% the opposite problem, which is we are trying to potty train my DD #2 for her to start her preschool (next week) for which she has to be potty trained (they don't change diapers).  And my in-home lady is not reinforcing enough for our comfort, and so DD #2 is 100% trained at home and anywhere that is not DC, but still has accidents at DC - which mystifies me and aggravates me.  And in a weird way I think it's actually EASIER to deal with kids in diapers than deal with kids who are potty training - because it's less mess.

    I say this with love - but this is me taking you by the shoulders and saying "why would you resist DC helping you potty train?"  Tongue Tied 

    Unless, of course, you truly think your LO is not ready - in which case I could see the resistance.  But again - (shaking you ever so gently) - they are offering to help potty train - that is a good thing! 

    Unless he's not ready - and you know him best...better than they do - do you think he's not ready?.

    (potty training is a LOT of work, and the fact that they want to work with you....unless he's truly not ready....)

    all of this, especially the bolded. I'd give my left arm to have Warner in daycare right now so that someone ELSE could potty train him. I know that makes me sound terrible, but we are going nowhere fast with getting him interested in using a potty or toilet here.

    And ditto pp (Sofka?) who said that peer pressure in these situations is a great thing! Seeing what the bigger kids are doing can get him motivated to try things he wouldn't on his own. I know that Warner seemed MUCH more interested in trying out the potty back in the spring when he was still in daycare and several of the kids in his class were using a big kid potty.

    ::pardon me while I cry into my coffee:: 


  • I find this so interesting that other daycares require pull ups.  The 2 have been at do not allow them at all.  They just go from diaper to lots of pairs of underwear.  We had to send in 8 changes of clothes a day but within 2 weeks, that was mostly solved with DD#1.  She was just turning 2.  Our potty training happened at the same time as a transition to a new room, one which DD was really interested to be in since they share a space, but are separated by a wall, and her older friends were on the other side.  So when they were starting her transition, they started taking her to the potty like the other kids in the new class. So assumed it was part of going to the new class.  We had a potty at home, but she hadn't really done anything on it, maybe peed in it once.  So I had no idea if she was ready or not, but I figured I would just try it and send her in underwear and see how she did.  If she didn't take to it after a day or two or was upset by it, I would back off.  She didn't have an issue, and it was a long 2 weeks of lots of laundry, but it was nice to have it done in a group setting by someone else.  She was also more willing to go sit on the potty at school than at home, since they were taking turns, so it was almost like something you want to do!  good luck. 
  • image northernvabride:
    I find this so interesting that other daycares require pull ups.  The 2 have been at do not allow them at all.  They just go from diaper to lots of pairs of underwear.  We had to send in 8 changes of clothes a day but within 2 weeks, that was mostly solved with DD#1.  She was just turning 2.  Our potty training happened at the same time as a transition to a new room, one which DD was really interested to be in since they share a space, but are separated by a wall, and her older friends were on the other side.  So when they were starting her transition, they started taking her to the potty like the other kids in the new class. So assumed it was part of going to the new class.  We had a potty at home, but she hadn't really done anything on it, maybe peed in it once.  So I had no idea if she was ready or not, but I figured I would just try it and send her in underwear and see how she did.  If she didn't take to it after a day or two or was upset by it, I would back off.  She didn't have an issue, and it was a long 2 weeks of lots of laundry, but it was nice to have it done in a group setting by someone else.  She was also more willing to go sit on the potty at school than at home, since they were taking turns, so it was almost like something you want to do!  good luck. 

    Oh, this makes me feel so much better! Perhaps I will get J potty trained with zero effort on my part (aside from some extra laundry).

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  • I answered your post above, but ditto NorthernVA.  When DD1 moved to the 2-year old room, they started her within a week or two of being there.  We knew she was ready and the peer pressure really helped.  Our DCP would not allow pull-ups, only underwear.  There were other kids that started PTing at the same time and it took them MONTHS to catch on.  It only took DD1 a couple weeks.  Honestly, I was so happy someone else started the process because DD2 was born three weeks after DD1 transitioned to her new classroom and I never would have gotten my act together to PT.  They jump started the process and we just followed their lead.  It was a HUGE help. Just check in with them regularily and ask them to respect your wishes if you feel like it isn't going well.  I actually think that diapering is easier for them and PTing really a pain - they have to deal with a bunch of kids peeing or pooping in their pants and then cleaning it up.  Can't tell you how many times I walked in the classroom to see a teacher cleaning up a poop accident.  DD1 didn't start doing the entire process (wiping, etc.) on her own until a couple months ago.
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