*Vent*

paulaanne

I just wanted to vent over people's reactions about the (potential) sex of my baby. (How ridiculous right?? lol) ... anyways, obviously we don't know yet, but it's already an "issue". At first it was funny and cute that everyone said they "know" I am having a girl or they want me to have a girl ... lots of boys already on both sides. But now, it is becoming a serious disappointment to people if it's a boy. I told them I feel "boy" and I get responses like "nooo, we need a girl" ...  makes me feel bad! This baby can easily be a boy and now I know how so many people are gonna feel if it really is! I can't believe people would be seriously disappointed (friends and family.) Perhaps I am being overly sensitive because when the times comes I am sure they'll change their tune, but I feel like it's crossed the line from cute guesses and slight hopes to serious disappointment. And I am getting it from everyone (no exaggeration!). Oh well

*Vent over!!*

Thanks - it always just feels good to get it out!

Lena122

Wow that does sound really rude! It's one thing for your family and friends to prefer a girl over a boy but to feel legitimately disappointed about a boy is really insensitive. What if you have a boy and years down the road he hears about how his family really wanted a girl? Hopefully you're right and once they know for sure they'll embrace him or her either way.

blondiemama09

I feel the same way, and I have only told 1 friend so far. She keeps saying, "I hope it's a boy" ..... and don't get my wrong, that would be great - but I can't help but read into the way (and why) she is saying it. What's so wrong w/ having a girl? I have a sweet little girl already and I would be thrilled to have another. I can't help but be upset that she is wishing 1 gender upon me. I'm happy w/ either, so everyone else should be too!

rrrowe15

People, especially family, get very attached to ideas whether you want them to or not.  I think deep down you know they will love this little baby no matter what they hope for.  Try just telling people that you don't care about the gender as long as you have a happy healthy baby. (That'll quiet 'em down!)  I hope it felt better to vent, my pregnancy hormones have been getting the better of me lately and I feel a little crazy.

Mom22inFeb

That happened to me alot with my DD. Once we actually found out it was a girl, the weird comments pretty much stopped.

I think when you don't know the gender yet, people think it's OK to tell you "I hope it is a ..." or "It's a ...". Once you actually KNOW what it is, they are totally obnoxious if they still say those things (of course, I'm sure you will still get SOME of those comments but hopefully not as many).

On a side note, I wanted to let you PAULAANNE know that you inspired me to get some bacon pizza Friday night as I have been dreaming about it since you posted about it last week and it was as delicious as I dreamt it would be!!

paulaanne

Mom22inFeb:

That happened to me alot with my DD. Once we actually found out it was a girl, the weird comments pretty much stopped.

I think when you don't know the gender yet, people think it's OK to tell you "I hope it is a ..." or "It's a ...". Once you actually KNOW what it is, they are totally obnoxious if they still say those things (of course, I'm sure you will still get SOME of those comments but hopefully not as many).

On a side note, I wanted to let you PAULAANNE know that you inspired me to get some bacon pizza Friday night as I have been dreaming about it since you posted about it last week and it was as delicious as I dreamt it would be!!

Thanks for your comments (everyone!) I really appreciate the support - makes me feel so much better!! Mom22 - Haha - sooo glad you enjoyed your bacon pizza - it also makes me want it again!!! LOL

lbsunde

I don't think you are being over sensitive at all... that seems really rude to me!  Everyone should be happy for you no matter what; I mean c'mon, it's a baby!  It's not like you picked out the sperm that was a boy.  People should realize that you have a 50/50 shot!

Jeter1028

I totally know what you're saying!  I even had a friend go as far as saying "If it's a boy, I will babysit anytime, but not if it's a girl."  This is also the same person that when I told her our possible boy name she said "I know someone with that name and I hate him.  That's a bad name."  Uhhhh, okayyyy.... 

People are completely self-centered...

tropicalmommy

Oh, I would vent too!

 If I were you, I would try not to care if other people are disappointed if you end up having a boy. It's not their baby, and for them to be so disappointed about it is kind of, I don't know, weird? I mean, why would they care so much if they aren't the people raising the child? Just remember that, and maybe the next time they say something about it you won't feel bad or guilty...which you shouldn't be feeling at all! Or maybe you could address the situation if someone is literally disappointed and sad, and inquire as to why they are so devastated, etc., then explain that you are beyond happy so they should be as well. Maybe putting it on the table will make them realize how silly they look for being sad over the gender of a child that isn't even theirs.

Plus, in the big scheme of things, everyone should be happy if the baby is born healthy! It seems some people forget how fragile a life is, and that it should be cherished no matter the gender.

Good luck to you, and I hope you aren't pestered by those people's comments anymore!

paulaanne

tropicalmommy:

Oh, I would vent too!

 If I were you, I would try not to care if other people are disappointed if you end up having a boy. It's not their baby, and for them to be so disappointed about it is kind of, I don't know, weird? I mean, why would they care so much if they aren't the people raising the child? Just remember that, and maybe the next time they say something about it you won't feel bad or guilty...which you shouldn't be feeling at all! Or maybe you could address the situation if someone is literally disappointed and sad, and inquire as to why they are so devastated, etc., then explain that you are beyond happy so they should be as well. Maybe putting it on the table will make them realize how silly they look for being sad over the gender of a child that isn't even theirs.

Plus, in the big scheme of things, everyone should be happy if the baby is born healthy! It seems some people forget how fragile a life is, and that it should be cherished no matter the gender.

Good luck to you, and I hope you aren't pestered by those people's comments anymore!

That is soo true! Thanks so much - your words really helped!!!