Some ppl don't make sense (smokers)

Sunny1inTucson

This weekend we went back home for our shower. FIL was super excited and talking about how he's still trying to decide on a nickname for grandbaby (princess...cupcake...ok whatever).  And he was super interested in my health. Example, he was eyeing my caffeine consumption a lot, worried when I considered getting a salted caramel hot chocoloate ("Salt's not good for you!"), and almost freaked out when I mentioned I was having a foot spasm (I wore heels during my shower).

And yet...when we would walk outside and I was right next to him, he would light up his cigarette in front of me and smoke it! He's an outside smoker. Just didn't make any sense how incongruous his behavior was. I pointed it out to DH later in private.

So....how adamant are you going to be about your baby and the "outside smoker" type person? What kind of precautions, if any, will you take or ask others to make?

Mogwai

I don't expect people to change their behaviors for my health.  If I was walking w/ someone who was smoking, I tend to say something to the effect of "No offense, but I gotta stand a bit further away.. Smoke ain't so good for me right now."

You're right... his paranoia about your health seems incongruous with his obliviousness about the effects of smoking.  I bet if you'd said something, he'd at least have made sure he was standing down wind when he needed his fix.

hoochifyd

I just let it go, unless it is someone I will be around constantly. MIL is a heavy smoker, and I just deal with it when we go for visits. I figure the 2 days of 2nd hand smoke I get over a weekend will not do permanent damage. But we only see them a handful of times each year, which is why I don't complain... if we saw them more than that, I'd make a point to excuse myself from the room/area anytime she lit up...

alicatt79

It's pretty big outside...I'll probably walk somewhere else.  I won't take my baby to places where there's smoke inside.  FWIW, I'm pretty sure your FIL is aware that smoking's bad.  In his defense, at least he's considerate enough to go outside.

megs042107

luckily, we don't have any smokers in the family... well my one SIL smokes but we see her so rarely (only at large family functions since she lives 5 hours away) i don't have to worry about it.

but, i would talk to him the next time he brings it up.  even if he is an outside smoker, the smoke still clings to his clothing, skin, hair, etc.  the baby will still breathe that in even once he's back inside. 

leslienpete

Luckily we don't have many smokers in our family to deal w/ that issue. In regards to the hypocrisy, everyone does it. You see someone who religiously exercises and is in great shape light up when they leave the gym. There is the health nut mom who eats all organic food and uses natural cleaning ingredients yet drives a gas guzzling SUV. You have a dad who is making sure his kids are all wearing helmets on their bikes, yet he drives around w/out a seatbelt...

EcoBaby

I half-jokingly told everyone when I got pregnant that they all have to quit when I get pregnant. They are all outside smokers. My babysitter (close family friend) is quitting. Her husband is quitting (they have to quit together). My sister is quitting but for different reasons. I don't think my mom will quit. However, I have asked her that when she comes to the hospital, to not have a cigarette before she gets there. I don't want her to hold my fresh, clean newborn smelling like cigarette smoke.

I also won't bring the baby outside around the smokers when they are smoking. I won't even bring my dog around them when they are smoking But everyone knows that I'm a little crazy about it, so I think they will all respect that. I have sat with them outside since I've been pregnant while they smoked, but at first, they would all try to smoke somewhere far away from me. Of course, that left me all alone while they were over there talking and having fun! So we just position ourselves so the smoke isn't blowing in my face.

Jim&Jaime

I don't have to deal with it too much, but while the baby is in the belly, I can just walk away.  Once the baby is "here" in the world, I will physically take him away from the issue.  People don't realize what harm second, and third, hand smoke can have on babies.  I've even started to have DH leave his bar clothes in the garage or on the balcony when he comes home, because I don't want our house to smell like smoke or any of us to have to breathe it in.

kittytaylor1

This is one of my pet peeves. I always get up and leave when people are smoking, even outside. Even outside I find it very strong and if I can smell it I don't want it getting in my system. It's not just for my baby's health but my own. We had a close family friend die of sh smoke and she never had a cigarette in her life, so I'm a little sensitive about it.

Twizzle

Luckily, none of our friends or family smoke so it's a non-issue.  However, they did tell us in our newborn care class that baby should not be around a smoker, even an outside smoker, unless the smoker takes a shower and changes clothes after smoking and before holding the baby.  Smoke, even stale smoke after cigarette is done, greatly increases the risk of SIDS.

Sunny1inTucson

Oh and it was sad. DH's sister (18 yo) got us some really cute baby clothes as a gift, but they TOTALLY smelled like smoke. Obviously you wash all the clothes before baby wears them anyway, but it was kinda sad how strongly they reeked.

janinekrause

i used to smoke before i got pregnant and my DH smokes but is quitting. I'm not neurotic about it at all. I definitely wouldnt have my baby in a house where people smoked or near a smoking person but thats about it. I know that smoke on clothes apparently is linked to SIDS but I am not sold on that at all.