MIL Vent

cs1225

I see that someone else posted this earlier today, but I just had the same thing happen to me.  We are not really telling too many people right now for several reasons, the main one being that I've had a miscarriage at 13w a little over a year ago.  We told our parents and asked them not to tell anyone.  Yesterday, my husband's aunt congratulated me.  I couldn't believe it.  My husband confronted my MIL today and she responded, "Well, you are already over 12 weeks."  Apparently it is up to her when people find out, not us!  So annoying.

kristin172429

I really don't understand when people do that!  Sorry that happened.  My thought is, yes you are excited, and yes, this is a new family member, but it is our news to share and we get to decide when to share it!!!  Our parents were great and really respected our wishes.  Maybe I should sign them up to counsel other people's parents on not telling??  ; )   I guess it is just one of those things where you know that anything you tell her now will probably be family news, so make sure you want it shared.  

harmonicbabe26

Oh I would be furious if that happened to us... That's why we are super careful not to let anyone have the slightest suspicion until we're absolutely 100% ready to let it out to the whole world.

Selfish and inconsiderate...

 Another thing I just cannot stand is reading what some girls had to go through when their own Moms were making them feel bad about keeping the secret long. I think I read one post where a girl's Mom confronted her saying "are you not telling me something?.." Excuse me???? This is MY news to tell, not yours to ask of, whether you're my Mom of a stranger on the street. Things liek that are between  the new parents, NOT paernts and MOM, MIL. Oh gawd... I think I would totally lose it if my Mom came out with stuff like that....

ClaireBear90

Oh wow. That was really inconsiderate of her. At least in my case it is my first pregnancy so I don't have a known history of miscarriage. (I'm assuming that your MIL knows about your miscarriage.) To know that you've experienced that loss and still go ahead with spreading the news before you feel comfortable with it... ugh, I seriously hope that if I have daughters-in-law someday I'll be more respectful of their wishes. 

wigirl2007

harmonicbabe26:

That's why we are super careful not to let anyone have the slightest suspicion until we're absolutely 100% ready to let it out to the whole world.

This exactly.  The only person who knows is a girl I work very closely with and she figured it out on her own.  Nobody else finds out until we're ready to share our news with everyone. 

repedrick

My MIL and SIL are super blabber mouths. So we decided not to tell anyone including parents until after 12wks when we were ready to tell the world to avoid this situation.

I know they're excited too but thats just rude to steal your news. DH and I had to tell MIL and FIL that SIL was pregnant about 2 yrs ago but that was because she was only 18, in college,baby daddy not in the picture, no health insurance, was 16wks along and not seeking any medical care b/c she was scared. So we felt we had to do it for her & baby's safety. I'm sure she will pull some stunt when we announce to try to get back at us, but I dont care cause the joke will be on her that we're ready for everyone to know anyways!