Stay at Home Moms

Moms of more than one

DH and I are starting to think about the timing of when to TTC #2. I know you can't totally plan these things but DS was a one shot deal so we *think* it could happen the first month out of the gate for us like it did last time.  SO, do we try for an early summer baby so that I can recover from my c/s and get used to a nb/juggling 2 kids w/o preschool in the mix? We also live in GA so trying to take DS to the pool in the heat of summer with a nb might be impossible, therefore not really fair to ds to be stuck inside/home all summer. OR do I aim for an august baby have a few weeks at home and then do the preschool carpool thing 4 days a week w/a newborn?

I am curious to hear from moms who have done it and what your thoughts are. I realize the adjustment from 1-2 will not be easy no matter what but I am trying to take daily life factors that into account that I didn't have to think about last time. 

Colin Patrick-7/14/08 Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers imageimageLilypie First Birthday tickers

Re: Moms of more than one

  • I say aim for March/April. You'll be ready to go by the time summer starts and preschool in the fall.

    I had a long recovery with the 2nd section (due to the fact I got horribly ill in the hospital and further aggrivated my stomach muscles) and it took a good 2 months before I felt 100%.

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  • For me, it really was better to have my kiddos in the summer due to work but yes - that first summer with the new baby we couldn't hardly get out because it was SO HOT and I didn't want to take a newborn out in that heat.  DS#1 barely got to go to the pool at all.  He is also a very active child who really needs to be outdoors as much as possible every day and that was hard.  Heat+new baby = bad combo.  Spring or fall would have been better in that regard.  Plus I would think it'd be nice to have some one on one time with the new baby while the older one was at school.  Personally, the putting two kids in a car thing never really phased me - then again both my kids always loved the car. 
    Adrian 7.6.07 - ADHD, Disruptive Behavior Disorder, Learning Disability-NOS
    Cam 6.6.10 - Autism, Global Developmental Delay, Mixed Receptive/Expressive Communication Disorder
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  • Baby #2 isn't quite here yet so I don't have too much advice to offer. All I can say is that being hugely pregnant in the summer has NOT been fun. It's really limited how much DD and I do away from the house since the heat/humidity have been killer for me. We've spent a lot of time at home in the A/C this past month.
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  • We have a March baby for #2 and it's been so hot that DS hasn't gone to the pool unless DH is with me.  I don't want the baby out in the sun and DS is super fast and all over the place.  Oh, #2 HATED the car for the first 4 months, that was fun.  ;)  Basically, I planned on being able to go to the zoo and stuff like that with the nice Spring weather, but the baby was so bad in the car that we couldn't go very far anyways. 

    However, it is nice to be able to go in the yard or driveway to play bubbles/chalk and we wouldn't be able to do that in winter.  Although winter with a crawling/almost walking baby and an active toddler may be crazy too. 

    So basically I really don't think it matters when you have #2.  Super helpful, I know!

    ETA:  Oh and we had #1 in preschool 2 full days until DD turned 3 months.  It was perfect!

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  • I was working when I had #2, and we had DS enrolled in daycare.  I took him in for about 3-4 hours most days.  I didn't find it a big deal at all to take the two of them with me.  I just carried the little one in the infant carrier or wore him. 

    I actually really liked having the time with just the baby. 

     

     

  • We just had LO 7/1 and I am so glad to have time to get past these rough first weeks before throwing preschool back into the equation. Got MT bfp right before Halloween.
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    DD1, Kathleen 9/15/2007

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  • I personally aim for fall.  DS1 was born in Sept. DS2 was born in July.  We weren't really planning for July, but that's what happened.  It worked out ok, cause we had enrolled DS1, then 2, in ECFE classes where I could be there with him and his baby brother was in a nursery.  It was only two hours a day.  It was pretty easy with two kids.

    This time around we wanted an October baby, but got another Sept.  So he will be born after DS1 starts prek-4.  But it's ok, cause DH will be home with me for a week so I can trial and error things by myself.  Surprisingly, I'm pretty excited about juggling three kids. One of which will be in school anyway. : )

    Whatever time of year you pick, it will be an adjustment.  Just roll the dice and see what ya get. : ) 

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  • My kids are November, May and December. I HATE May babies. You can't really do much with them because it's so hot in the summer. They can't be out for longer periods of time, and you're in such terrible shape because you just had a baby.

    I LOVED having kids in November and December, even with the cold and flu season. By the time summer rolled around, I had a 6-9 month old and we could do more "stuff."

    That's just my $0.02.

    As for your adjustment, it's going to be a bit easier for you since your son is 3. Even though it's a tough age, your son is more self sufficient than a 1 or 2 year old.

    GL! Only you and DH can really make this decision. 

    image Mommy to Barbara 11/8/05, Elisabeth 5/13/07, Loukas 12/23/08 and Lazarus 09/25/12
  • And I had a newborn and a 3YO in preschool (when my 3rd was born). It wasn't bad to do the whole preschool pickup/dropoff. Not great, but it became routine, just like everything else......
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  • I would say wait even a bit longer.  This child is due the beginning of December.  A bit earlier would have been fine.  We've had no issue getting out to go to the pool or anywhere else other than I have to really make sure and stay hydrated.  A fall baby would give you time to get used to the car pooling thing and still allow you to be mobile in the summer.  If you are carpooling other people's children, wouldn't they understand and pick up your end for a few weeks while you recover?  I can't imagine them not accommodating that.
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  • Of the two options you posted (early summer or late summer baby) I would do the latter. You'll be significantly pregnant but if you take DS to the pool it would feel good for your body too.

    And there isn't an issue with preschool IMO. You drop DS off, you pick him up. You obviously have to take the new baby with you but in the beginning they sleep through everything anyway. It really isn't a big deal and multiple children mean you'll have to be juggling different schedules anyway.

  • Thank you all for your input. I am leaning towards being pg through the summer just b/c DS has a LOT of energy and I think it'd be hard for him to be cooped up with a new baby since my recovery will be longer given the c/s factor. I would have my mom and dad to help and DH. I think either way will be an adjustment I was just curious what those of you who had done it felt was the 'easier' route. We'll have to see what happens. As far as carpool I think my friends that go to the same school would definitely help but not sure how much b/c my house is out of the way to school and morning traffic would make that difficult but that's a whole other PITA b/c of how where I live is spread out. 
    Colin Patrick-7/14/08 Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers imageimageLilypie First Birthday tickers
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