Shower for co-worker?

amandachs

Ok ladies, please help me with your infinite wisdom.  I have a co-worker who has been with us less than a year (not that I know if that makes a difference) and the office just found out she is expecting her 4th child.  It makes me uneasy to make a huge deal out of this since yes it's her 4th, but her other three are all under 5yrs old.  There are two other co-workers in the department, one a male and one a female, both expecting their first child respectively. 

My question's are these:  Would it be inappropriate to do a $ amount and just do a department gift card to each of the three for 1/3 of what was collected?  I don't want to offend anyone but don't want it to be a babyshower popularity contest about who goes home with the most presents.  And besides, I can't imagine the chick having her 4th would have the balls to do a registry, but if she did would it be ok to ignore it?

Thanks!

mairanellis

My husband's company is going through this right now.  We are expecting our first baby, and his coworkers are throwing us a baby shower at their office.  He has a coworker that was due with her 2nd baby a few weeks before us.  The office had a "celebration" with cake and punch, and everyone contributed to a gift card for her.  So, while the office didn't throw her a full-blown shower (as they do for the other first-time parents), they still celebrated with cake and punch. 

dragon_chica

mairanellis:

My husband's company is going through this right now.  We are expecting our first baby, and his coworkers are throwing us a baby shower at their office.  He has a coworker that was due with her 2nd baby a few weeks before us.  The office had a "celebration" with cake and punch, and everyone contributed to a gift card for her.  So, while the office didn't throw her a full-blown shower (as they do for the other first-time parents), they still celebrated with cake and punch. 

This.  If you guys were planning to go forward with a shower for the other two than do that.  The one having her 4th should get something smaller and a group gift.  If she complainss than she's just tacky and needs to suck it up.

weddingbells2010

Ditto to PPs.  At my job, only 1st time mothers get showers, even if their other children were from before they were employed with us.  Our "sunshine" committee, who organizes showers and handles other things like bereavement or illness baskets, will usually recognize an expectant parent of more than 1 LO with a $25 gift card and some cake and coffee at a faculty meeting.  Sometimes people bring a little something for that person, but it's not a shower.  They do not participate in the shower that is thrown for first time parents, either.

amandachs

Ok thanks guys.  Sounds like an appropriate way to handle it. I just didn't want to come across as the insensitive one without kids if they brought up doing a lot more.

klreese0213

i actually think this is a great idea (collect an amount, then divide into thirds). It definitely takes away from the popularity of it all. Maybe also bring a cake in for lunch to celebrate all 3 babies.

greengirl0909

At my work, we all chip in at the beginning of the year. ANYTIME someone has a baby, they get a $25 gift card.(large staff)

At my husband's work, a "discrete" person offers to collect money and people give her whatever they want to give for that person.   When we were expecting the first time, another lady was also expecting.  When our babies were born, we each got a cash gift, I have no idea if it was the same for each of us or not.  (small staff)

NewFamily09

I think you should see if people at work want to get together and line up meals for her for a  few weeks after birth.  I know if I had 4 kids under the age of 5, I wouldn't have time to cook.  She'd probably appreciate meals a lot more than gifts.