Finally DH and I had our first consult with Dr. Chen at IRMS St. Barnabas today. All the positive feedback I got about her from her patients here was right on. She is kind, supportive, gentle and treated us with dignity and respect. She carefully spelled out what our options are, basically saying that being 40 somethings doesn't work in our favor but not to give up hope.
The only disappointment was that the finance rep was not available to meet with us, but we expect her call in the next day or two. In the meantime, Dr. Chen asked me to get a mammogram since my last one was 2 years ago and to give her the results of the pap smear I get tomorrow with my OB/GYN.
This afternoon I was on the phone with my insurance company to find out coverage for IVF and it's great. the only catch is that the IVF coverage expires when I turn 45 this November. So if we're going ahead with IVF we have to get moving now! Then I called my prescription plan to find out how much of the fertility drugs (injections) would be covered. Since I forgot to ask Dr. Chen for the names of the drugs, the insurance company will contact her to get that info then determine how much will be covered.
It was a relief to leave the office in a positive mood, but I'm still emotionally fragile about this -- the cost, the odds stacked against us due to our ages, mine especially. DH didn't complain once! So he feels, as I do, that we were treated well by a infertility team that cares about their patients.
I'll keep you posted. Thanks again for all the good vibes!