s/o s/o "Were you trying?"

MrsLnt

I got this question a few times and I think that's the question that bothered me the most because it's so, so invasive.  I especially hated when I got asked that by coworkers.  If I say yes, it sounds like my job wasn't my priority (I'm in a very family-unfriendly field) and if I say no, it sounds like I'm irresponsible.

Did/do you get this one a lot?

pea-kay

It's just soooo personal. Like, if you say yes, they are picturing you and your husband having sex.

Ew. Not something I want my aunt thinking about.

klr210

wow! inappropriate. invasive. rude.

I would just answer vaguely with "we're excited about these kids" and then move on. Wouldn't it be fun to respond with "so are you avoiding pregnancy by using birth control or just not getting any lately?"

SpinningJess

I hate places of employment/industries like that.  I strongly feel that work should just be the means by which we have the tools necessary to support our families.  Work should never EVER come before family!!!  I'll happily say yes we were trying to have baby #2 and we were blessed with #3 at the same time.  Anyone who doesn't like it can shove it haha

In all reality, there aren't many questions that bother me, because I know it's just curiosity and conversation starters. I take them as an opportunity to educate people who don't know how multiples "work" so to speak (now that I have this awesome information!  haha)

nichellemybelle

I HATE this question! Almost everyone asks me. It's kind of a private matter and no one's damn business. I try to avoid answering this question but if they insist on knowing I tell them yes and move on. And if I'm really in a mood I say something really inappropriate in regards to my husband "releasing his sperm." That usually gets them to shut up.

tSquared1987

I have gotten this a couple times. I just don't understand why anyone wants to know about someone's sex life. Ew. I don't want to know about anybody's so why do you want to know about mine, KWIM?

AlishaMay

Wow, I haven't had this one yet!  Yikes, that is pretty personal, and like Peakay said, you imagine all sorts of inappropriate images running through their heads. 

leslie13510

The one time I was asked this question I replied with, "Well he was in Iraq, but I sure was trying." 

Talk about a conversation killer.   I kind of wish more strangers would open with this question actually, because at least I know they wouldn't ask anything else after they heard my answer. 

MrsClark8109

pea-kay:

It's just soooo personal. Like, if you say yes, they are picturing you and your husband having sex.

Ew. Not something I want my aunt thinking about.

EXACTLY-- however my crazy aunt who is incredibly invasive and has no social skills asked this and my response was "OMG like 3-4 times a night we tried"--- needless to say her verbal diarreah has stopped!

kmb585

Yeah, I don't get what people are thinking when they ask such personal questions????

But as PP mentioned "yes we were trying and we happily got #2 and #3".  Thankfully we did b/c I really never want to go through that year of infertility, miscarriage and rollar coaster of emotions EVER again!

adoubleu12

I think it is the worst when it is people I KNOW that ask me if we were trying to have kids.  Like they didn't know that we weren't married, we JUST had moved in with each other, and I was in the middle of getting my degree.  It felt like they just wanted to hear me say that they were a complete accident so they can laugh at or pity me. Or even when people that don't know me ask the question, it is their way of saying "You look way too young to be having kids".  A-nnoy-ing!!! 

felinity

I found out at 6 weeks that a coworker of mine and I were both pregnant on the same schedule. (She's expecting one baby; I'm expecting twins.) I think the first thing I asked her was, "Were you trying?"  And then I felt like a bonehead (for all the reasons listed above) and added, "I'm so sorry, you don't have to answer that."  I was just surprised, and it popped out of my mouth. I definitely didn't mean anything by it.