IVF question, what do you think?

cnw112784

So I was watching this show and this lady, who is probably 29ish, was trying to concive her second child, had been trying for 6 months with no success was going through her second IVF treatment because she wasnt getting pregnant "fast enough"....what do you guys think of this after all our IF chats yesterday? I have nooooooooo problem with IVF at all, I just know I had trouble conciving this child which was my first, it took about 2 years, which compared to some isnt long at all, but I just was thinking, wow to be on your second round of IVF and youve only tried for 6 months, and your first child was one of those "first times a charm" babies...I was just surprised her doctor would even do it so quickly since she had no problems before and was still pretty young...I dont know all the background on it, but it made me say hummm...what do you think?

FabulousMrs.P

It depends on what the issues are. Even if she doesn't have any physical problems, her husband might. If he has very low sperm count, etc.  then IVF treatment might be necessary.

Also, I know some women who have had conditions where they have to get pregnant within a small window of time due to a chronic disease which with time can lead to major conception issues.

I can't think of anyone I know who has gone through the expense, pain, and emotional stress of IVF just for the fun of it. And most doctors wouldn't suggest it unless they thought it was necessary.

KozieKim

Personally it really doesnt get my panties in a knot over anything ppl choose to do. It does seem rather fast for IVF but if the couple has the $ to spend, its their choice. Most think what the Sarah Jessica Parker choice to hire a surrogate was wrong..really who can get pregnant at 100lbs.. but still I am not a fan of pregnancy, and if I had the money would consider it myself. I had a singleton and now preg with twins my desire to be pregnant again is over. 

HappyAardvark

I've never gone through IF treatment but from what I have learned from those who have, no respectable RE would jump into IVF after only 6 mos of TTC and no other diagnosis.

jpeazybreezy

I get what you're saying. She comes across as a little lazy, or impatient. I would say that there could be issues with both of them that would make a move to IVF the best option for them, and after 30 thats the time you have to wait anyway right?

I bet there are some impatient people out there who don't want to wait a year before moving on to treatment, but personally I think that the medical establishment shouldn't get a say in it anyway.  My Dr shouldn't decide how long I have to wait before I get treatment for something. Its despicable. Why subject a couple to months of heartbreak and stress just becuase the Dr thinks they should "try"? That sucks.

And you KNOW rich ppl don't wait that long. I bet there are Drs that will let you start IVF prior to even ttc the ol' fashioned way, if the price is right!

Mrs. Mo

Was it only due to how quickly she wanted to get pregnant or was there some other reason?  If she knew she couldn't get pregnant naturally or would have trouble ( lack of ovulation, tubes blocked, severe MFI) then it really doesn't matter what her age is or how long she has been trying. Did something happen to her after having the 1st child that may have caused Secondary Infertility? If they actually said that her 1st child was conceived the 1st try and she or her SO has no medical issues than I really don't agree with it. If that was the case, her doctor should also have his license revoked for not following the American Society of Reproductive Medicine's standards. IVF is no joke. You have to inject yourself several times a day with hormones that have awful side effects and then go through a surgical procedure to have the eggs removed and another procedure to have the fertilized embryo(s) tranferred....all for about a  50/50 chance of success. I am also assuming that she has no IF coverage and was paying entirely OOP. No health insurance company would cover anything IF related for someone who was that age and totally healthy (no medical reason for not getting KU).

If she truely was doing it just to get pregnant faster & not for a medical reason, I think she is one of the rare exceptions that the media likes to hype like OctoMom.

cnw112784

Mrs. Mo:

Was it only due to how quickly she wanted to get pregnant or was there some other reason?  If she knew she couldn't get pregnant naturally or would have trouble ( lack of ovulation, tubes blocked, severe MFI) then it really doesn't matter what her age is or how long she has been trying. Did something happen to her after having the 1st child that may have caused Secondary Infertility? If they actually said that her 1st child was conceived the 1st try and she or her SO has no medical issues than I really don't agree with it. If that was the case, her doctor should also have his license revoked for not following the American Society of Reproductive Medicine's standards. IVF is no joke. You have to inject yourself several times a day with hormones that have awful side effects and then go through a surgical procedure to have the eggs removed and another procedure to have the fertilized embryo(s) tranferred....all for about a  50/50 chance of success. I am also assuming that she has no IF coverage and was paying entirely OOP. No health insurance company would cover anything IF related for someone who was that age and totally healthy (no medical reason for not getting KU).

If she truely was doing it just to get pregnant faster & not for a medical reason, I think she is one of the rare exceptions that the media likes to hype like OctoMom.

yea, it was just a tv show, so I dont know all the details, but she only said " we havent been able to get pregnant for awhile so we are doing IVF" so she didnt go into detail about if there was an issue, which I agree, if you have a problem or your husband does, then by all means do what you need to do, and I cant see how anyone would just want to do all that is involved with IVF, just for the fun of it...because it is zero fun sticking yourself etc....she just never said, " I have 'blank' wrong, or an issue with'blank' so I have issues conceving" she just said its been taking awhile, and she did say she and her husband concevied her son on the first try last time, and shes kindof a celebrity in a way so I know she has the money...I just kindof had question marks over my head when I thought about it....and the person I was watching the show with NOT ME, so dont flame me, lol, said " she already has one biological child, what about adopting a second one" which I know is going to send people over the edge but I think she meant it as, you were able to carry your own child once and if there are all these problems, why not adopt...but that was HER opinion, not mine....

MrsLoos

I would hope that after yesterday's UO post we would learn not to judge or assume we know why people take the routes that they take to become parents or build their families.

Like pp said there are many reasons why they may be persuing IVF after 6 months of TTC. 

Reality t.v. and the entertainment industry have done such a disservice to the IF community. There is so much misleading information that is put out there and so many times infertility treatments are made to look like an easy fix for people who are impatient. It's rare that you see a t.v. show that does a decent job of depicting the struggles that an infertile couple faces and they seem to perpetuate the myths and judgments that the general public has towards IF and IF treatments.

PMTeagle

PappsMcgee:

FabulousMrs.P:

It depends on what the issues are. Even if she doesn't have any physical problems, her husband might. If he has very low sperm count, etc.  then IVF treatment might be necessary.

Also, I know some women who have had conditions where they have to get pregnant within a small window of time due to a chronic disease which with time can lead to major conception issues.

I can't think of anyone I know who has gone through the expense, pain, and emotional stress of IVF just for the fun of it. And most doctors wouldn't suggest it unless they thought it was necessary.

Pretty much this. If neither of them have issues and are just impatient, well have fun spending $15-$30,000. I'd be surprised the RE would do it after only 6 months, but whatev

 

This.

aliciaroset

I know it can take fertile couples up to a year to conceive (my sister and a set of friends each took around 10 months) so I'd be frustrated after 6 months, but I don't know if I'd even go to an RE by then.  I assume she 1) had a diagnosis or 2) had money (or both, of course)

IVF Isn't something to take lightly physically, so I'm hesitant to think anybody would just jump into it just because they were impatient, but there are all kinds of people out there.

03/17/2007

I was only 23 when we underwent our first IVF cycle. They couldnt find anything wrong with my husband or me. We only tried for 1 yr before consulting our OB and then a RE. We got a lot of negativity and "just wait it out" from people, but in my gut i knew something was wrong. It turned out our embryos were missing calcium needed to develop after day 5. That is something that they would have never been able to diagnose until we actually went through IVF. Yes we were starting to feel impatient, but waiting wouldnt have helped in our situtaion either. Our first IVF miracle was born in July 2009 and we now are pregnant with another from FET. I agree that going throughout IVF just becaise youd ont want to wait is crazy, but if you feel its what needs to be done then do it.

Janimal

It's not fun to announce to the World "HEY!  My husband has a low sperm count and they can't swim!"  Or - "Hey - turns out my ovaries are like those of a 45 year old!" --- So I wouldn't judge her for not elaborating on why they went ahead with IVF. 

I try to do my very best not to judge other peoples' reproductive choices.  But there are some I do judge.  I refused to watch Kate & 8 because I believe they give IF treatment a bad rap.  Octomom is another whole story.  RESPONSIBLE people and Drs don't risk having high order multiples.  So many people who knew we were undergoing treatment made comments about us having a litter of kids, and part of the disdain for treatment I think comes from this misconception.  You know there was another multiples mom pregnant at the same time as Kate.  But her babies didn't make it and they were ripped apart for their choices.

I was monitored carefully and was NEVER at risk for multiples.  This baby in my belly now was the result of ONE frozen embryo being transferred.  We transferred one before this one that I miscarried.  We transferred one at a time because that was our responsible choice to have a singleton baby.  The most we would have considered is 2.  In special circumstances it might warrant transferring more, but that's the exception.

Anyway, I got off on a tangent.  IF is misunderstood.

ProcrastinatingBride

jpeazybreezy:

I get what you're saying. She comes across as a little lazy, or impatient. I would say that there could be issues with both of them that would make a move to IVF the best option for them, and after 30 thats the time you have to wait anyway right?

I bet there are some impatient people out there who don't want to wait a year before moving on to treatment, but personally I think that the medical establishment shouldn't get a say in it anyway.  My Dr shouldn't decide how long I have to wait before I get treatment for something. Its despicable. Why subject a couple to months of heartbreak and stress just becuase the Dr thinks they should "try"? That sucks.

And you KNOW rich ppl don't wait that long. I bet there are Drs that will let you start IVF prior to even ttc the ol' fashioned way, if the price is right!

Actually, it's after 35.  And you're right, for enough money, most people can find a doctor to tell them/do to them whatever they want the doctor to do. 

Having said that, there are standards of care for a reason.  Do you think Nadya Suleman's doctor should have implanted 8 embryos because she really wanted her 8 babies all at once, and why shouldn't she get to decide that for herself?

Jovan3

I think maybe she's just anxious. My SIL tried for 9 years before getting IVF! Some people aren't as patient as others. I don't think I'd be patient either.