traveling to see family over the holidays WWYD?

eturp

We are supposed to go visit DH's extended family over the holidays this year in FL. While we've known about this for awhile we've been having a really hard time putting $$ aside to save up for the trip (tickets alone are going to cost us around $1000). I'm sure all of you ladies know just how expensive babies are and how they always need something, not to mention I'm in school and only working part time. So this trip is inching closer and closer and we still don't have a dime set aside for it. MIL and DH's grandparents are adamant that we come to visit but I feel like they don't understand how difficult it is not only for us to save up but also the logistics of traveling that far with a 9 month old. Anytime we say anything about the stress a trip like that is going to put on us they guilt us by saying that all of the other "kids"--DH's cousins--are making the trip so why can't we? Well for one reason because they all live within driving distance of FL and it would take us nearly 3 days each way if we were to drive. Also, while DH has family out there we haven't been told for sure if we will be able to stay with someone or if we will need to find a hotel (yay more $$). I completely understand that his family wants to see us (and mostly wants to see DS) but I'm frustrated with their lack of understanding and am getting more and more worried that we won't be able to pull it off and save enough in time. I have a feeling if we don't go out there it will turn into WWIII and somehow it will be all my fault and MIL will say it is because I hate her or some BS like that. So any ideas how to handle this situation??

elle980

Can you call in sick?  ha ha  If you don't want to go or don't have the money to go, I'd just be honest about it and stick to your guns.

amethyst1220

If you dont have the money, you don't have the money. Have they offered to help with your travel expenses? I wouldn't put my family's finances in jeopardy to go. Sorry, it's a sucky situation!

sweetpea2718

So we're in a similar situation for a family event.  It was sorta last minute, therefore, DH is just going and I'm staying home.  Flights would have put us over $800 between fees, bags, parking, etc. We have a lot to do to our house, & I'm still on leave without pay.  Also, we were there a couple months ago.  Flying with a 2 month old is completely different than this 4 month old I would be taking on a plane. He is getting way more vocal about what he wants and doesn't want! It's frustrating because DH doesn't explain this to MIL, so it does look like i'm being selfish and keeping DS from his fam.  

Do what you need to do for your little family.  Like PP said, if they really want you there, they can help pay for it.   

 

mrsbmw09

Like PPs have said, if you don't have the money, then you don't have the money. Just be honest and explain to them that money is really tight right now and you don't think you can afford tickets, much less a hotel room. If they really want to see LO they will help you pay for the trip, or they can come visit you. Do what is best for your family and stick to it.

amy259

I think your DH should prep them now, he should tell them he doesn't think you will be able to pull it off. Do they not realize how expensive plane tickets are and you guys just had a baby it's not like they're free???!!! It's a stinky situation and hopefully they will get over it.