Interesting article: "How to land your kid in therapy"

ironmommy

Thought some of you might enjoy this and would love any thoughts or comments!

 

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2011/07/how-to-land-your-kid-in-therapy/8555/

 

 

susanmosley

I really like that article.  I think the author did a nice job citing sources - since it isn't a new opinion or theory - but also sharing her experiences and opinions.  I think there is a lot of truth to what she discusses, and that article gave me a lot to consider - both regarding how I was raised and how I am as an adult, and of course regarding how we are raising DD.  

lite-bright

I liked it and think it puts in words a lot of things I've always thought. It's counter to some of our impulses as parents, though. If you struggled, you want to help your kid so things are easier for them -- but then they never get the character growth that comes from floundering, figuring out your own way, relying on yourself, and overcoming obstacles.

I mean, I see it in myself. My mom talked a lot about how we couldn't afford x-y-or-z growing up, being on an "austerity budget plan," etc. It gave me a lot of anxiety as a kid -- I felt l like we were constantly in danger of homelessness. On one hand, I don't want my kids to feel the way I did because it was very stressful and not something I think a kid should worry about (family finances).

On the other hand, it made me very aware of what I could do to earn money, I got a job at an early age so I had my own money and didn't have to ask my parents for things, it made me extra-aware of managing my money during college and not getting into crazy credit card debt, and it has meant that financial security is always very important to me. 

I do wonder how you teach those things -- truly understanding the value of a dollar and working for it -- if your child grows up without any of that stress. They might learn the principles, but I don't know if they take it truly to heart. 

UsedToBeGoldie

I think everyone needs to do what they feel is truly best.... and not stress so much about it.

I'm the youngest of 4, and DH is the youngest of 6.  Every one of our siblings is so different from us - yet, grew up in the same house, same values/lessons, etc. 

DH's brother is fantastic with money and uber successful... DH is horrible with money, but successful enough that he's OK.... and then his other brother is to the extreme of horrible with money and horrible with keeping a job and keeping his life in any kind of order. Just looking at those 3 shows that what the parents teach or do only takes a person so far.