September 2011 Moms
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I'm "screwing up" my moms plans

Sorry no paragraphs, I'm on my phone... The backstory..I need to have a rcs. My OB told me she wanted it to be no later than 39 weeks because I went into labor with DS a week early and she wants me to avoid labor at all costs. On September 10th I will be 28w6d. I want LO to cook as long as possible, and kind of fell in love with the date. I don't have the date set in stone yet, it will be scheduled in 2 weeks. Anyway, this past Sunday I went with my mom to a baby shower. While talking about baby stuff with everyone I mention the cool 9/10/11 birthday that LO will most likely have. My mom whips around and tells me that I can't have the baby that weekend. That her and her friends are going camping then, already paid for the campsite, and that I was screwing up her plans. Her one friend(who is always a complete b*tch and has no kids of her own) then tells me about how selfish I'm being and so on. My mom told me that if I really was set on that date that she would figure something out, with a sigh and a roll of her eyes. I feel really bad now and don't know what to do.
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Re: I'm "screwing up" my moms plans

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    your mom needs to get over it.  that's her mistake for scheduling the trip.  what if you weren't have a c/s and went into labor that weekend anyways?  shame on her.
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    imageTheFannins729:
    your mom needs to get over it.  that's her mistake for scheduling the trip.  what if you weren't have a c/s and went into labor that weekend anyways?  shame on her.
    Yes, she is being ridiculous. I am hoping for a VBAC, but if things don't go well I will be having a RCS. My Mom declined a wedding in mid September on the off chance that I go into labor. Don't feel bad, your Mom is being selfish.
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    imageTheFannins729:
    your mom needs to get over it.  that's her mistake for scheduling the trip.  what if you weren't have a c/s and went into labor that weekend anyways?  shame on her.
    I was kind of thinking the same thing. I just wasn't sure if I was being the irrational pregnant daughter, because that's how it made me feel.
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    imageAmandaPaige6410:
    imageTheFannins729:
    your mom needs to get over it.  that's her mistake for scheduling the trip.  what if you weren't have a c/s and went into labor that weekend anyways?  shame on her.
    I was kind of thinking the same thing. I just wasn't sure if I was being the irrational pregnant daughter, because that's how it made me feel.

    no, and quite frankly, the health and you and baby and having a c/s during the time that your dr suggests is a million times more important than a camping trip.  I hope she comes around to seeing the bigger picture here.

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    You're not being irrational.  I'd tell her if her camping trip is so important that she needs to make you feel guilty over it, then she should go. 
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    wow! "you're" being selfish?? That's crazy. I would completely not consider their plans at all
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    Thanks ladies. It just really sucks. She has always had a way to make me feel guilty or wrong about things, and I guess this is just another example. We had a strained relationship up until about a year ago when we hashed out some problems. Things are a lot better now, but I feel like this is where the slippery slope starts. I haven't told DH about this yet because I know he will flip out on her and I don't want the drama. However the c/s isn't even scheduled yet, and my dr might not agree to that specific date anyway. I just had to get it out there because it's been bugging me more each day.
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    Your mom is being ridiculous. No question about it. I asked my mom not to go to a Bar Mitzvah that weekend, knowing that I would likely have my RCS during the week leading up to 9/10/11, and she said no problem (she also will be the one to watch my DS at that time). FWIW, 9/10/11 is a Saturday, not sure if your OB will schedule you for a Saturday. 

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    imageTheFannins729:

    imageAmandaPaige6410:
    imageTheFannins729:
    your mom needs to get over it.  that's her mistake for scheduling the trip.  what if you weren't have a c/s and went into labor that weekend anyways?  shame on her.
    I was kind of thinking the same thing. I just wasn't sure if I was being the irrational pregnant daughter, because that's how it made me feel.

    no, and quite frankly, the health and you and baby and having a c/s during the time that your dr suggests is a million times more important than a camping trip.  I hope she comes around to seeing the bigger picture here.

    Fanny said it best, both times. Your mom is acting like a spoiled brat. You and the health of the baby should be more important to her than a camping trip with friends that she can reschedule or do another time. She should get over herself.

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    Tell your mom to go on her trip and have a great time. You don't need her there, you'll have your husband. See how she likes feeling not needed/wanted. I'm sure she'll feel plenty guilty, I'm a big fan of turning guilt trips around on people and giving them a taste of their own medicine.
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    With it being so close to your due date, I'm surprised she agreed to go on a camping trip! 
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    I agree with pp in regards to your mother.. as a side note I am in love with the 9/10/11 date and would kill for ds to come then. Im due the 14th and DD was three weeks early so I really doubt hell stay in that long but if I do make it to 39 weeks ill beg for an induction then.. dh thinks im silly but its cool to me.. im lame like that. DD is 5-5-10 which I think is cool since 5+5=10 so.. only fair :)

    good luck and tell your mom to stop being so selfish.. its your baby you don't need to work around her..
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    imageCNAMamaof2:
    Tell your mom to go on her trip and have a great time. You don't need her there, you'll have your husband. See how she likes feeling not needed/wanted. I'm sure she'll feel plenty guilty, I'm a big fan of turning guilt trips around on people and giving them a taste of their own medicine.

    I couldn't have said it better myself.  If camping is more important than the health of her daughter and grandchild then she can go camping and miss everything.  My sister is hoping I go early so she can go on a trip the weekend after my due date (not scheduled).  But she's not going to buy a ticket unless I've already had the baby. 

    I think the stupidest thing about this is that campsites are not expensive.  So you already paid for it, so what, you're out 30 bucks.  BFD!

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    WTF ?!?!?!?!?  I love how other people (especially our own mothers) can say the most special things to us at just the right moments....holy crap.....

    'nuff said

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    Seriously?  You're Mom needs to grow up a little bit and get her priorities in check. And some new friends to boot!  I think that's a fun date (wish I could use it) and you should totally go for it!  Keep the people around you that are as excited as you are and that's all you need. 
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    Why would your mom even schedule a trip so close to your EDD if it is so important to be around?
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    imagedianamcu:
    With it being so close to your due date, I'm surprised she agreed to go on a camping trip! 

     I was thinking the same thing. And as for your mom's friend. I would tell her to shove it.

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