**RE Update** (Warning: Long and Pity Party for 1)

MySweetBaboo

I had my first appointment with the RE yesterday and it went great.  Based on all of the test results she got from my OB and my history and clomid, (which she hates and she doesn?t prescribe), she feels that IUI with Letrazole/Follistim/Trigger is the way to go. This is her preliminary recommendation before more blood work and an HSG which I will have next cycle.  She does not see any reason for IVF to ever be considered for us at this time.  She said she would do 3 IUI?s and if none of them worked, we would have to re-group and come up with another plan.

I had an ultrasound and I have an 18mm folly, ready to ovulate.  She said all of my follicles look great, and that is good news for the protocol she is leaning toward. My ovaries look great, my uterus looks great, but the hsg will tell us more. My right ovary is tucked back behind my uterus. I asked her if this is a problem and she said it could be, she doesn?t think so at this time, but that the only way to move it would be laprascopically. (I can?t help but have a vision of my OB haphazardly throwing my ute and ovaries back in after my c-section). I had mentioned in my history that ?a little? endometriosis and a couple of cysts were found and removed during my c-section and she said that was good to know while we are looking for a diagnosis.

Dh had his blood drawn, they held off on mine because my OB should have two things they need (Rubella immunity and Cystic Fibrosis) from when I was pregnant. So they will draw my blood when I go for my hsg which I will schedule on cd 1.

She alluded that clomid didn?t work and for the amount of time that we have been trying that she didn?t think timed intercourse was giving us the 20% chance that most couples have of achieving pregnancy each cycle and that IUI would give us that 20%.

The bad news:  

Dh doesn?t want to spend the money on IUI for only a 20% chance. He said if we didn?t have our daughter, he?d be more than happy to risk it. While I understand, I am very upset and feel like there is no hope.  I was hoping he would agree to do just one IUI cycle, but right now he is not keen on the idea. We have a cycle and a half to decide what to do. After the results of the hsg, things could change and I will ask if there is anything else we can try before IUI. I may put off treatment with the RE and try acupuncture for a few months.

I am just not feeling very optimistic about our chances without the IUI. This has consumed me for 2 years and I feel like I am going through a breakup. I know that sounds dramatic, but seriously, I am in mourning of sorts. It is a very odd place for me to be.

Sorry for the book and if you made it this far, I appreciate it! J

LME06

I'm glad all your news from the RE was good Baboo. I'm sorry YH isn't on board with the plan. I can understand your frustration. I hope you two can come to an agreement soon!

RobinR91

I'm happy you have a plan, or recommendation. I understand your feelings too, and I hope you and DH come to a solution that works for everyone ASAP.

 

I'm sorry you are going through this, I hope things work you. You are in my thoughts!

adamstodrake

I am so glad for the good news! Hopefully your DH will come around to trying the IUI at least once when he's had some time to digest this news. The breakup feeling makes a lot of sense. I know how badly I am ready for baby #2 and when DH wasn't ready I was really heartbroken. I had this vision of my two babies playing together and was ready to make that happen. DH was not, and so I waited.

We're supposed to TTC starting in August, and sometimes DH will make a comment about waiting a little longer which is like a punch in the gut. If DH said he didn't want to try for more at all, I don't even know how I'd cope with that in the beginning. It would be like rewriting my vision for my family in a way. Sorry that got so long winded. What I was really trying to say is that feeling that way is totally understandable. Hopefully acupuncture would help if that is the route you go, but I will keep my FX for you that your DH comes around to the IUI if other approaches don't work. Hugs to you this morning!

ncgirlgoingtori

Baboo, I'm so sorry for the mixed emotions that you must be having.  It sounds like you had a good experience with the RE.  Perhaps your husband just needs a llittle more time to digest all the information, and the two of you can continue to discuss IUI.  It's good that you have a cycle and half to make a decision.  Good luck with whatever you decide. 

psychgirl33

I'm glad your appointment went so well!  I'm sorry your husband isn't on board with spending the money on the IUIs.  Maybe he will change his mind.  That's a very hard place to be in.    Then again, maybe if you talk to the RE about your hubby's reluctance, she might have another approach you could try.  I hope one or the other is the case!!  ((hugs))

Bizzy98

I'm sorry you are going thru this Baboo.  I can understand why you are upset and feel down.  Maybe Dh will change his mind after having some time to think about things.  I'm glad that your test results came back good.  That's good news!  I hope you are feeling better. 

BlueEyedDreamer

So glad to hear your appointment went well! I'm sorry you and your H are not seeing eye to eye on how to proceed - that is such a tough decision. Hopefully you can get some alternative options and create a plan B when you go in for your HSG. Acupuncture for a few months sounds like a good option, too!

I can't imagine how hard it must be to face the possibility of ending TTC. My heart goes out to you, baboo! ::hugs:: 

punkymama

It's great that things look so great but I am sorry that you are feeling down  ((big hugs)).  There is no easy answer and I hope that you & YH can come to a compromise soon. 

xoxo

ccam

Your RE appointment sounds like it went really well.  I'm sorry that YH isn't on board right now.  Maybe he just needs time to think it over and he'll come around in the next few weeks.  Good luck to you!

Ricola

Oh Baboo, first of all, I am sending you zombie hugs:

I am glad that you went to the appointment and got everything started. It sounds like your RE know what she is talking about and has a good idea of what to expect from the tests and what kind of treatment would work. I hope that your HSG and all the b/w come back great and that there will be no more things to deal with.

I am so sorry to hear that YH is not on board with the IUI right now. I can see why you feel the way you do. I hope that he can let all of this sink in and once the tests are all done and you guys know exactly what you are dealing with, that he can re-think his opinion and weigh in all the facts. I imagine it to be hard to not be on the same page about how far you would go with an RE and it's definitely something that needs to be talked about, so nobody resents the other. 

One step after the other, Baboo, and the first ones are taken. I hate that you are in this position right now, but please do not lose hope. Wait for all the tests to come back and see what your RE says after she reviews the results...maybe there is a way around IUI for now. Sending you tons of love and hugs, my friend.

sekura

Baboo--sorry to hear you and DH aren't quite on the same page. 

I don't know if this would help, but you said that the reason he didn't want the IUI was due to $$.  Would it be possible for you to save that money yourself (get a second job, sell some books/cds/antiques around the house, babysit, all of the above) to raise the money for it yourself?  If that's the only thing that is holding him back, and it is really important to you to get the IUI, I'd bet you can make it happen.

I wish you the best of luck, whichever way you go with it .

red1976

I'm so happy to hear that everything looks so good! I just wanted to chime in because I too have a right ovary that is consistently tucked behind my uterus. It always has been ... they never see it on u/s. That's the ovary that had the heavy dermoid cyst on it and it just never returned to position. My gyne could never answer whether or not it was an issue so I'm left to wonder if it contributed to our troubles conceiving.

 As for YH - I would give him time. Things may change and his mind may change as well. Just continue to keep communication open - it always makes things easier. Make sure you express to him exactly how you feel - as you did with us. Big hugs and best of luck to you always  

purple4u

Hi baboo!  Sound like your RE has a good plan in place.  Give your DH some time to process the info.  Talk to him, he is probably feeling the way you are but may not be ready to admit it yet.  

PM me or email me if you need to chat!   

catahoulatte

Pretty much ditto what everyone else said. I'm so happy that the first steps went well.

I don't know if your H is like mine, but anytime there is something thrown at him unexpectedly, he reacts negatively until he has time to think it through and then he becomes more rational about it. I hope your husband can work through everything that was said to you both and reconsider. Like one PP suggested, what about a savings account or something for the IUI, that way it's not just coming straight out of pocket?

Lots of hugs and happy thoughts coming at you. I hope you guys can get a game plan moving that satisfies what you both want.

salt78

psychgirl33:

I'm glad your appointment went so well!  I'm sorry your husband isn't on board with spending the money on the IUIs.  Maybe he will change his mind.  That's a very hard place to be in.    Then again, maybe if you talk to the RE about your hubby's reluctance, she might have another approach you could try.  I hope one or the other is the case!!  ((hugs))

Psych said it better than I could have. 

I'm so glad that the RE was a good experience...maybe your husband just needs a little more time to process everything. In the meantime, I am always a fan of acupuncture if you want to try that. All fertility aspects aside, I've found that it is incredible for relaxation and stress.

(((((((((MANY HUGS))))))))))

MsNessa

I'm very sorry that you're going through this.  I can't imagine how tough it must be.

I hope your DH comes around to at least doing one and that ends up being all you need.   

nola 1017

It sounds like your RE gave you a great plan, and is so positive. I'm sorry that your husband isn't on the same page as you. **hugs**

ukcats27

I'm glad you had a good appointment with the RE.  Hopefully after thinking about it, your hubby will want to do the IUIs.  I'm sure he was just overwhelmed with all of the information at once.  Good luck!

lycih

I'm glad to hear that everything went pretty well with the RE, but I'm so very sorry that you and YH are having trouble seeing eye to eye on where to go from here. That's got to be very difficult.
Hopefully the acupuncture will help, and maybe YH just needs a bit of time to mull it over. 
Best of luck whatever you two end up deciding. 

kerivp

I'm very glad that you had good news and a plan from the RE.   I can completely understand your frustration that DH isn't on board with the IUI.  I think I would feel the same way.  

T&P for you and I hope your DH comes around!!

lukesliebe

I'm glad that the RE appt. went well for you Baboo and that you have some recommendations now. I'm sorry you're having this disagreement with YH. I hope it all works out smoothly and you boht can come to an greement that pleases both of you.

Big (HUGS)...

siple1am

I am so sorry that your DH isn't on board. Maybe it will just take time? I hope you will get to try at least one IUI. ((Hugs))

CarolinaGirl82

I don't blame you in the slightest for having a hard time with this information  It's still possible that you're husband could come around on the IUI when he sees how much this is something you want, but I hope that you can reach a better place emotionally.  I can't imagine how difficult this must be for you, and I'm definitely thinking of you and hoping for better news after the HSG.

kimikins79

I am sorry your DH is on a different page.  Maybe with some additional time, he will change his mind, especially after he sees how his reluctance is upsetting you.  Best of luck!

Cholzmei

I'm days late reading this because I've been offline since Friday, but maybe you'll check the thread sometime this week...

I'm sorry for what you are going through.  I'm sure it must be very disheartening and stressful.  I'm hoping that you and YH can come to agreeable terms for both of you soon.

MySweetBaboo

Thank you all!

Dh and I have agreed to go "the cheapest route". I take that to mean 1 IUI. I am going to talk to my RE about other options available after the hsg results. I am supposed to get it in July, but if my period doesn't start by July 8th, I may have to wait until August due to my vacation starts right smack around phantom cd 6.

I think we can get 3 cycles of injectibles with TI for the price of one IUI, but if she really doesn't think it will work, then I will take my chances and do one IUI. Beyond that, we won't stop trying but won't pursue treatment except maybe acupuncture.

We'll see how it goes. Thanks for all the support, I really appreciate you all!

Squishy622

Baboo I'm late to the party but will echo everything everyone else has said, and raise them a giant (((((hug))))!

bellaarchitect

{Saw your post while I was stopping in to congratulation Salt.  I now post randomly on the IF board.}

Baboo!  I am so sorry that you are at this crossroads right now.  It is totally understandable to feel like this after 2 years of TTC, it IS like a relationship!  My heart goes out to you, and I know that it is difficult to make heads or tails right now, but there are some positive things to recognize too.  I hope that you and YH can work out the details and come to a resolution that works for both of you.  Let me know if you do acupuncture...and if so, are you going somewhere ITP?  DH and I are both looking into doing this together, now that we know we are MFI.

  xxxx bella

BriannaHH

I am wishing you all of the best Baboo. I truly hope that things work out for you.