July 2011 Moms

MIL vent WDYT

My friends threw me a shower last saturday. They gave DD a rack three feet long that was full of dresses in different sizes! There are summer ones, winter ones, and my favorite a few heirloom ones. MIL has taken a children's sewing class where you learn to do pintucks and smocking etc... She gets up and announces to everyone that she took this class and now (because our friends were so generous) she has nothing to do. She says I'm not going to sew for this child and goes on and on from there. She repeats this tyrade at my house after the shower to DH. It bothered him that she seemed so ungrateful! I have apologized for her to my friend who organized the whole thing. She just told me she knows how my MIL is and she wasn't worried. Does it sound as rude to you as it does to us? If she wants to sew so bad there is plenty that she could still do, monogram some things for instance.

I should mention that she has NO FILTER. You never know what she is going to say next and has offended a lot of my friends before.

Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Photobucket

Re: MIL vent WDYT

  • Yes, that's incredibly rude and childish.  Your friend wasn't worried because your MIL looked like a complete ass.

    I would never suggest other things for MIL to sew.  In fact, I'd have shrugged my shoulders at her and said "No one asked you to sew anything.  Don't do it if you don't want to."

    I don't enable the crazy, nor do I tolerate the immaturity.

    ETA:  Sorry your MIL is a douche and made a fool of herself at your shower.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Wow.  That is pretty rude at a shower.  I understand that she was excited about it and her feelings were hurt, but was she expecting that no one would buy clothes for the baby and that she would make them all?  Yikes!

     

    BabyName Ticker Lilypie - Personal pictureLilypie First Birthday tickers
  • Loading the player...
  • She's probably just super bummed that she put the time into taking the class and now doesn't think she will get to use her new skill for your LO. I'm sure she was looking forward to making cute dresses for her. Not saying she still can't. That being said, she didn't need to go over the top like that. At least your friend was understanding. I would just kind of brush it off. No sense in stressing over it, even though I can understand it being bothersome. 
    Jake on swing AlternaTickers - Cool, free Web tickersimage
  • I can understand being disappointed that there isn't a "need" for an outfit now, but WTF woman.  Hasn't she heard that little girls can never have too many dresses?  If she hadn't made such a scene I'd have likely asked to have her make the baptism gown (if you're doing one) or something.  But now... I'd say F her and the horse she rode in on.  I'd ignore her tirade. 
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    DD1, Kathleen 9/15/2007

    imageimage

  • imagetawillers:

    Yes, that's incredibly rude and childish.  Your friend wasn't worried because your MIL looked like a complete ass.

    I would never suggest other things for MIL to sew.  In fact, I'd have shrugged my shoulders at her and said "No one asked you to sew anything.  Don't do it if you don't want to."

    I don't enable the crazy, nor do I tolerate the immaturity.

    ETA:  Sorry your MIL is a douche and made a fool of herself at your shower.

    Exactly. Your MIL should be embarrassed.

    2 girls and a dog
  • Ignore the tirade; it was totally inappropriate. Besides, didn't she think that you would want to pick out some clothes for DD yourself? We've gotten a lot of clothes & I've noticed that most people have very different ideas about what is cute than I do!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • imagetawillers:

    Yes, that's incredibly rude and childish.  Your friend wasn't worried because your MIL looked like a complete ass.

    I would never suggest other things for MIL to sew.  In fact, I'd have shrugged my shoulders at her and said "No one asked you to sew anything.  Don't do it if you don't want to."

    I don't enable the crazy, nor do I tolerate the immaturity.

    ETA:  Sorry your MIL is a douche and made a fool of herself at your shower.

    While she was at my house DH suggested she make another quilt like she made for DS. It's beautiful. She snapped at him and said I'll make one but, I'm not going to make one like that! She is wondering why me made the primary plans for DS care while we are @ the hospital with my parents.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Photobucket
  • Also, does she think the only dresses your DD will need are in the NB-3M range?  Did she assume you got a lifetime supply of dresses?
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • imagetawillers:
    Also, does she think the only dresses your DD will need are in the NB-3M range?  Did she assume you got a lifetime supply of dresses?

    Yeah. I reckon she won't need anything larger than 18 month size.Confused There are one or two in every size from NB up to that. I was overwhelmed by the sight of them.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Photobucket
  • imageBethD76:
    imagetawillers:

    Yes, that's incredibly rude and childish.  Your friend wasn't worried because your MIL looked like a complete ass.

    I would never suggest other things for MIL to sew.  In fact, I'd have shrugged my shoulders at her and said "No one asked you to sew anything.  Don't do it if you don't want to."

    I don't enable the crazy, nor do I tolerate the immaturity.

    ETA:  Sorry your MIL is a douche and made a fool of herself at your shower.

    While she was at my house DH suggested she make another quilt like she made for DS. It's beautiful. She snapped at him and said I'll make one but, I'm not going to make one like that! She is wondering why me made the primary plans for DS care while we are @ the hospital with my parents.

    Big Smile  My MIL would do something like yours did.  That is, years ago she'd have tried it.  DH and I have pretty much put a stop to her ridiculousness by distancing ourselves from her.  We just don't want to be around her foolishness.  We only see her about once every month or two.

    She was at our son's baseball game last night and asked me what our plans were for our kids while I'm in the hospital.  She was pretty pissed when I told her my mom would be taking care of them.  It really shouldn't have been a surprise.  I'm not sure what she expected.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Ugg she reminds me of my MIL. Everything has to be about her. I've just learned to take what she says with a grain of salt and try not to let it bother me (sometimes easier said than done) Then I just vent to someone and usually feel better. My MIL also has no filter and has said some pretty rude and inconsiderate things to me, some I would NEVER even say to my worst enemy. So I can completely understand why you're so upset!

    It just sucks that she had to ruin a perfectly nice occasion that was meant to be fun. Sorry you had to go through that. Feel free to vent to me ANYTIME.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
  • imagetawillers:

    Yes, that's incredibly rude and childish.  Your friend wasn't worried because your MIL looked like a complete ass.

    I would never suggest other things for MIL to sew.  In fact, I'd have shrugged my shoulders at her and said "No one asked you to sew anything.  Don't do it if you don't want to."

    I don't enable the crazy, nor do I tolerate the immaturity.

    ETA:  Sorry your MIL is a douche and made a fool of herself at your shower.

    This!  Incredibly rude and uncalled for!

    BabyName Ticker
  • [note to self: when your son grows up and gets married, do not being a raging b*tch or crazy lady to his wife.]

    your MIL is crazy. I would have been mortified if that had happened at my shower. Granted, your MIL is the one who looks crazy and not you and luckily your friend seems to understand that but still, I would be pissed. Luckily your DH seems to agree with you.

    I would drop it for now. Based on what you mentioned regarding her inquiries as to why your parents are watching your DS while you are at the hospital (vs. her), it sounds like she is upset about more than sewing. It sounds like she is feeling left out. I dont know why we as wives always seem to carry the burden of managing our ILs feelings, but I know I do. For me..I ask my FIL to hang things around our house and the nursery so that he feels involved. I also try to send MIL pictures of things that I have already done so that she feels involved too.

    If she brings it up again, I would let your DH respond and just be simple with it "mom, I think its great that you took the class but we didnt ask you to and you have DD's and DS's whole lives to make them anything that you want, it is not BethD76's fault that her friends were so generous"

    good luck, and to all of us having sons...remember all of these horror stories about MILs when our sons are grown.

     

     

  • imagetawillers:

    Yes, that's incredibly rude and childish.  Your friend wasn't worried because your MIL looked like a complete ass.

    I would never suggest other things for MIL to sew.  In fact, I'd have shrugged my shoulders at her and said "No one asked you to sew anything.  Don't do it if you don't want to."

    I don't enable the crazy, nor do I tolerate the immaturity.

    ETA:  Sorry your MIL is a douche and made a fool of herself at your shower.

    Couldn't have said it better myself..

  • Here's my question.... You are 37 weeks pregnant. If she was planning on making some dresses in NB should she have already done that. I mean if she really wanted to make them she should aready be working on them.

    I am so sorry she acted so childish. This is something my mom would do. I just wonder what happens to their filter as they get older.

  • My MIL made my Maid of Honor cry the morning of our wedding by asking her if she'd gained so much weight because of medication she was on...

    I feel your pain.  If I was your DH I'd be asking for a direct apology to your friends.

    Mama of 2: one who grew in my womb, both who grow in my heart.
  • imageKristin030:

    good luck, and to all of us having sons...remember all of these horror stories about MILs when our sons are grown.

     

    I think about this all the time. I usually try to learn from other people's mistakes. I know I'm not going to be an overbearing, overprotective mom already. But the girl he marries better not need to be b!tched at either haha.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker image Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • imagerookiemom9:
    imageKristin030:

    good luck, and to all of us having sons...remember all of these horror stories about MILs when our sons are grown.

     

    I think about this all the time. I usually try to learn from other people's mistakes. I know I'm not going to be an overbearing, overprotective mom already. But the girl he marries better not need to be b!tched at either haha.

    I made the vow not to treat his woman bad when I found out I was having a boy. My grandma was awful to my Mom and you heard about my MIL. I'm breaking the cycle.

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Photobucket
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"