my life in Holland

DAWNNA76

this was on the Autism speaks blog but I thought it was sucha great  post I wanted to share. while I dont have a autism diagnosis (even if we ever do) I do have a 2 children with developmental delays and this speaks to my feelings

 

WELCOME TO HOLLAND

by
Emily Perl Kingsley.

c1987 by Emily Perl Kingsley. All rights reserved
I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience to understand it, to imagine how it would feel. It's like this......
When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. The Michelangelo David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."
"Holland?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland?? I signed up for Italy! I'm supposed to be in Italy. All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."
But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.
The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.
So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.
It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around.... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills....and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy... and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."
And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very very significant loss.
But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things ... about Holland

FutureFung

I've always loved this poem. I'm glad you found it My offer (from your last update post) is open any time if you ever feel like you'd like to talk, have questions, would like a resource, etc.

Mama_v2.0

That is beautiful! Thanks for sharing. 

suzie711

What a beautiful poem and message - thank you for sharing

doublem

I've always loved this anecdote, too - it has been really helpful for me as a teacher and as a person who seems to be in a different boat than where I wanted to be at this point in my life.  Thanks for reminding us about it!

StellaZ

I have enjoyed some of Kelle Hampton's take(s) on that poem as well. It helped her a lot.

I also came across this blog (Floor Pie) through Teacher Tom, the journey of a parent and their son who was recently diagnosed with Aspergers.