Parenting after a Loss
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Sorry to ask :-( need support/help

I am having a really hard time ladies...and I know in the "big picture" I should just let this go I just for some reason can't. I am really being down on myself about BFing or lack there of. DS and I were doing great, and I was ok with supplementing for a while now, he is just a big baby and I couldn't keep up (he's 26 lbs now!) 2 weeks ago Brady got a bad cold and refused to nurse and it has been down hill from there. Now 2 teeth are in and bitting has started too. Pumping at work has been really hard with how busy I am (laziness too) and he just pushes away from me (crying here) my boobs haven't been touched in 2 days by him or a pump and I don't see how I will make it much longer. My supply has been dropping for weeks too. DH tries to make me feel better by saying I made it so far and for a 26 lb kid that's like a 3 year old haha, I guess I feel so guilty because I was a SAHM with DD and nursed her for 2 years, never had a bottle and I loved the closeness with her, and I just feel like a bad mom with DS. I know stress in my life right now is not helping (CPS, taking ex to court, work...) but it's almost as if I'm making a bigger deal about nursing to forget other stuff. I cry daily about it and just wish I could get past this and not feel horrible. Should I keep pumping and try building a supply and putting more effort into it or does it seem like it's causing more stress and should be ok with stopping now? DS doesn't seem to care either way...sorry ladies I know I haven't been around much either, life has just been hard but DH and our LO's have never been better. Outside stress just sucks :-(
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Re: Sorry to ask :-( need support/help

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    You are being way to hard on yourself. 26lbs you have done a great job!

    Only you can decide whether to quit or not but having a happy mommy is important. BF'ing should be a good experience and it sounds like it isn't now. If you think it could be again I would say keep trying but if it is causing stress then maybe it would be better to move on.

    Either way you have a happy, healthy 26lbs boy and you should be proud of the 8 months of BM you provided for him.

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    First off, (((big hugs))). You have done a great job. I seems to me that you are getting more stress than benefit from it. DS has obviously already gotten so much benefit from BFing. He's thriving, happy and healthy (aside from the cold -- which is totally normal!).

    I can't answer how you should feel because only you can decide that. I hope you are able to come to peace with whatever you decide and feel proud of how far you have come. Smile

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    ((HUGS))  I would focus on the positives, you made it 8 months breastfeeding, that is amazing!  I can't tell you what to do, but I agree with PPs- the stress of BFing won't help anyone.  There is nothing wrong with formula/bottle feeding.
    ***** TTCAL/Forever Buddy to Cour10e******
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    Thanks ladies! I knew just getting it out would help too! I think I am being too hard on myself too, I always had it in my head that making it a year would be so easy because I made it 2 with DD. So I feel like I failed what I thought would be so easy...make sense?? I agree that if I have a happy baby and healthy one at that and I'm the one not happy something needs to change. I think I will try this week with pumping and maybe nursing a few time when he is tired and laying down with me to see if that helps. And if not and I just don't produce much I am going to stop and not look back. I need to look at the positives...I get my body back ;-)
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    You are way hard on yourself and you're right, all the outside stress isn't helping. I'm sorry you even have to go through all of this. You've done great and there's no reason to feel otherwise. ::big hugs::
    Marie, wife to Ron, mom to DS
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    I think you should do what makes you and your DS the happiest, which right now sounds like weaning. {hugs}  Being a good mom isn't about what you feed your baby.
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    ((Hugs)). You are not a failure whatever you decide. He's a happy, healthy, much-loved boy. Hope all the stress eases up soon.
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