moving/renos/husband vent

ohsaysaysay

We just closed on our new house on Sunday and have been working on renos ever since.  Even before we got the house my husband and I had been butting heads over every decision.  Now that we have the house it seems like he'll ask for my opinion, shut it down, and then continue asking me what I think until I agree with him or until I just give up and say "I don't care!" or he'll tell me i'm out voted because his mom agrees with him.  I sometimes feel like telling him " Well you can have your mom move in with you".

I'm really really starting to break down over this.  We had an issue with paint that he and his family chosen(it looked horrible and pink) and the spare room had to be repainted.  I felt really rushed and really overwhelmed and frustrated and just chose a color without really taking my time to make sure.  Well now I hate it.  I didn't say anything yesterday when I first saw it because his whole family was there and I was so frustrated, upset and near tears I wanted to wait until we had alone time to talk about it.   Because we are currently living with my in laws(adding even more stress to the situation)  I didn't get to talk to him until bedtime.  So I brought up how I hated the paint, and he kinda shrugged it off because he likes it and his family likes it.    So I brought up how he isn't listening to me or any of my opinions and my husband snapped on me.   He took everything I said the wrong way and twisted it and made it seem like I was saying I hate everything in the house(which I didn't say and isn't true) and that I'm not appreciating any of the work that he is doing, and that it would be nice if I would come and give him more affection when I check in on the renos(WTH is that supposed to mean???)

I am beyond furious now that I've had time to think about it.  I know he's waiting for me to give in and apologize, but there is no way in hell i'm buckling now.  It's done me no good so far, so I refuse to give in.

 That man better have chocolates and flowers waiting for me when I get home today.

mabma80

It's time to stand your grond and put your foot down. Turns out it's YOUR house not Dh's family's house.  You go to DH while his family is there, and lay it down how it's gonna happen. Or, you'll end up with a brand new house that looks nothing the way you want it to.  Better to speak up now before they paint the whole da*mn house pink!

In the end, someones feelings are going to get hurt, and it's best that it's not yours. 

ohsaysaysay

I know,  that's what i'm doing from this point on.  The frustrating part is I can't even blame it on my in laws.  It's all my husband.  He asks for their opinion and they give it to him, and he turns around and uses it on me.  He wanted to take his mom lino shopping this morning,  I let him know he would wait until I got done work.