well meaning coworkers (vent) — The Bump
Pregnant after a Loss

well meaning coworkers (vent)

Ok, I want to start off saying that I absolutely want to and try to do what is best for baby.

Here it goes, let the vent begin!  So durring several conversations with coworkers about my pg, we have gotten on the subject of PNV.  Since about week 7, I have been unable to take them due to m/s.  When ever I tell them this, they basically start lecturing me about why I really should be taking them and giving every suggestion under the sun on how to take them without getting sick. 

I've tried explaining that it really doesn't seem to matter when I take them or with how much food, they make me gag!  It's like they think I don't WANT to take them.  They are good for me and baby, of couse I want to take them, I just can't!  I have tried the chewables (supposed to be a good alternative), and they are OK, I just know they aren't as good as true PNVs. 

I think the thing that irritates me about it the most is that no one really seems to understand just how bad the ms can be for me sometimes.  It's kinda like I said before, it doesn't matter if my stomach is empty or full, and doesn't matter what I've had to eat.  I seem to stay pretty nauseous most of the time and then throw up when it gets really bad (although this past week has been much better). 

I feel like it is more important for me to focus on eating and keeping food down rather than aggrevate my stomach further with a PNV.

I know that my coworkers have nothing but the best intetions in mind when giving me advice, but some times I just want to scream at them that they just don't under stand.  On top  of all that, I always end up feeling really guilty.  Like becuase I can't take my PNV right now, if something bad were to happen it would be all my fault, even though I'm doing what I can.  Ugh, it's just so frustrating! 

Ok, vent over, thanks for "listening".

Nov. 19, 2010 BFP #1--m/c Dec. 24th, 2010 First cycle after m/c on Feb. 2, 2011--March 8th, 2011 BFP #2 EDD Nov. 19, 2011. Nadia Dorothy Grace born on 11-18-11 @ 3:04pm 6lbs 14oz Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

Re: well meaning coworkers (vent)

  • That's really frustrating- I would just avoid the topic with them if possible.

    FWIW, I've been taking the chewables the whole time b/c even after m/s subsided I couldn't do the "real" vitamins.  My MW said the vitamins are more for me than for the baby (although the folic acid is important). 

    Keep down what you can keep down and talk to your OB about it at your next appointment and go with what they say.

    imageLilypie Second Birthday tickers image
  • I would maybe try the chewables as has been mentioned.  I take the Flintstone Vitamins because I've been told it's okay and  I also purchased a folic acid pill that is 500mg as well to be sure I get enough. I know it creates more pills to take but I've heard many complain about the PNV making them sick.  I haven't had any real m/s yet or issues but my pill issue is I have a difficult time swallowing pills and I CANNOT swallow the PNV at all I choke every stupid time even if I cut them in 1/2.

    And you're right I'm sure your co-workers do have the best of intensions and probably don't realize how they are coming off.  Just kick in that "selective hearing" strategy when they lecture ya!!  You're right though eating healthy, proper nutrition and keeping down what you need is VERY important so focus on that and just talk to your doctor about your concern.

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  • It's hard to deal with people when their good intention are so abrasive. That said, have you talked with your doctor. If your m/s is extremely bad they can prescribe something for you to help.

    I was horribly sick with DS for 6 months and alternated between PNV and Flintstones on the really awful days. For me I was going to be sick anyway so I took the vitamins, esp b/c it was hard to keep a good diet down (which IMO can drastically reduces the need for one anyway).

    If your keeping good food down then just tell your co-workers that or that you've talked with the OB and all is well. They don't need to know all the details.

    image Nicholas loved for 28 weeks, 4/11/10
    Baby Boy loved for 15 weeks, 5/31/11
    Baby Girl loved for 16.5 weeks. 3/1/12
  • It's amazing how opinionated people can be on the subject of babies.  I can see how they would be though, one of my coworkers is pregnant.  She got pregnant shortly after I miscarried and doesn't take prenatals, eats terribly, etc.  I shut my mouth though because it's not my business to tell her how to take care of herself and her baby.

    I would tell your coworkers, "thank you for your concern, but I have talked with my dr. and we decided this is the best choice for me right now".

    Pregnancy Ticker Missed m/c 11/30/2010
  • I haven't had a chance to talk with my OB about it since my first apt, but definitely plan on talking with her as I have an apt with her this coming Wednesday.  However, one of my coworkers daughters has the same OB I do.  She also had really bad ms and couldn't take PNVs, so she was told not to worry about it, that she would be able to catch up on nutrition and stuff later on in her pg.  She was also told (I think) to try the chewables and that's what she did.  I'm definitily trying to do the chewables (although sometimes the taste of them makes me gag too, so I may need to try another brand). 

    Nov. 19, 2010 BFP #1--m/c Dec. 24th, 2010 First cycle after m/c on Feb. 2, 2011--March 8th, 2011 BFP #2 EDD Nov. 19, 2011. Nadia Dorothy Grace born on 11-18-11 @ 3:04pm 6lbs 14oz Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
  • Sometimes people don't understand that their good intentions can be hurtful.  Don't feel guilty, just do what you can.  I switched to the gummies when m/s got worse because then they don't come back up.  My doctor actually told me to just skip them if they make me sick and just take folic acid instead.  Try eating healthy when you can and know that you're doing the best you can for your little one. 
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker ........ born 11/16/11 at 36 weeks weighing 3 lbs, 6 oz
  • Get the gummy kind. It has saved a few of my friends when they couldn't even do the chewables. Honestly I think the only reason I've been able to tolerate my PNV so well is because I was taking them for over a year before we conceived this time around. I would definitely talk to your OB and see what he/she says. And stop talking to your coworkers about pregnancy choices- trust me, it will only get worse when you are already getting "advice".
    After two losses, a rainbow arrived! DD born 11.5.11
    Dx with severe Asherman's syndrome after a botched PP D&C (pursuing med mal)
    Hysteroscopy Oct '13, not enough progress 
    Hysteroscopy Jan '14, given an end-of-the-road diagnosis
    Joined International Asherman's Association April '14 
    Not ready to give up yet.
    Hysteroscopy with Dr. Isaacson (an expert in the USA) 6.2.14: Good prognosis, at least 50% of cavity open.
    Repeat hysteroscopy scheduled with Dr. I on 6.16.14. Great progress. Unbenched!!!!
    Discussing actively TTC with DH after the heartache of the last year. We're both reeling.
    Please, please, please. 
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