My MIL thought it would be appropriate to text me about DH's Two newly-pregnant cousins...

angelabrown810

Both are my age and we've all been married for around the same time. One is having her second, the other is pregnant for the first time but having TWINS!!!! (emphasis, my MIL's not mine. This from the same woman who thought that telling me about how she read the book "Heaven is for Real" and believed that I would meet the babies I lost in heaven as if that would be some sort of bizarre consolation. After receiving said text, I promptly got up from my desk at work, walked into a bathroom stall and burst into tears where I proceeded to cry for approximately one consecutive hour. Every time I think I'm making some sort of emotional progress, something like this happens....or I have another miscarriage. 

I finally caved and started researching therapists near my office in DC. This board has been so helpful to me during the past year, but IRL I have no one. My husband has been as supportive as he knows how to be, but he doesn't really understand. Every single person I know seems to be able to have healthy babies on a whim, whether they want one or not. I'm just so tired of feeling like I'm in this by myself.

AgWife83

Oh I'm so sorry, I wish I knew what to say to make it all better. (((hugs)))

hopefulmom81

angelabrown810:

Both are my age and we've all been married for around the same time. One is having her second, the other is pregnant for the first time but having TWINS!!!! (emphasis, my MIL's not mine. This from the same woman who thought that telling me about how she read the book "Heaven is for Real" and believed that I would meet the babies I lost in heaven as if that would be some sort of bizarre consolation. After receiving said text, I promptly got up from my desk at work, walked into a bathroom stall and burst into tears where I proceeded to cry for approximately one consecutive hour. Every time I think I'm making some sort of emotional progress, something like this happens....or I have another miscarriage. 

I finally caved and started researching therapists near my office in DC. This board has been so helpful to me during the past year, but IRL I have no one. My husband has been as supportive as he knows how to be, but he doesn't really understand. Every single person I know seems to be able to have healthy babies on a whim, whether they want one or not. I'm just so tired of feeling like I'm in this by myself.

I can totally relate to this post.  You are definitely not alone.  I don't understand what is with the multiples announcements lately and why people think we are appropriate people to tell personally.

 

angelabrown810

Thank you ladies. Of course, I would have found out anyway, as today was the day that one of them decided to switch to the obligatory Facebook ultrasound avatar.

KZ2010

I'm so sorry she did that.  People do not understand how hurtful it is to hear about yet ANOTHER happily pregnant person.  My DH's step-mom did the same thing to us (she told us about my DH's cousin's pregnancy the day after our D&C....yeah, thanks). 

I'm glad you're seeking help from a therapist.  No shame in that...I have my first appt. this Saturday.  I too feel like I have no one IRL because my BFF is pregnant (she's due 3 weeks after I would have been) and my DH doesn't understand why I'm still "wallowing" and not "over this by now".  It's only been two weeks since we learned the baby died, but he's "over it" and is actually angry at me that I'm not.  Sigh... 

Anyway, this post is about you, not me.  I'm very glad you're looking into getting more support.  I really hope it's helpful for you.  In the meantime, be kind to yourself and know that you have us.