South Florida Babies

Everything comes to an end at some point

I haven't told anyone about this yet and I need to get it out of my chest and vent so here goes.  If you are my FB friend, don't mention it, I have not told my family.

 We are getting divorced.  We haven't filed yet but will do so in the next couple of weeks.  I'll be moving out soon as it's just too awkward living in the same house. It's not that we don't get along, it's that we get along too well and there is just no room for either one of us too really grief, if you will, because it still feels like nothing has changed (since we live together, etc).

 We are getting divorced simply because we just grew apart and for a long time our relationship has been more like roommates or even brother/sister.  What is so heart wrenching for both of us that we feel we losing our best friend.  I can't imagine living without him because he really is my rock but the romantic love just isn't there.  Needless to say, there is no animosity whatsoever, no fighting, no nastiness, nothing.  It's very amicable but it doesn't hurt any less.

I'm devastated and disappointed, mostly because he's such a great dad, a great companion and a great person.  However, we both realize this is the best for both us and this way we end it on a good note without turning divorce into a nightmare and screwing up our kid.  

Carrying on as a single mother terrifies me.  I've always been very independent but the thought of being a single mom just paralyzes me.  Not just being a single mom, but being  single STUDENT mom.  Again, I'm lucking that Matt will still be around and very, very involved but I'm still terrified.

I was the one that actually brought up the bright pink elephant in the room as we had both been living with our heads buried in the sand .  Right now I"m in the "What the f^ck have I done?!?!?!" stage and having seconds thoughts.  It's one of those "too good to leave, too bad too stay" situations. I don't know where I"m going with this, I just wanted to vent a bit because I haven't told anyone and there's only so much comfort the two of us can give each other. 

Re: Everything comes to an end at some point

  • I'm sorry, June. Even if you know it's the right thing to do, I'm sure it's still a very difficult decision. 

    {{hugs}}  

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  • So sorry to read this. You will certainly have your challenges, but stay strong!  You need to do what is best for you and your family.  {{hugs}}

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  • AlbahAlbah member
    Oh June! My heart aches for you as I read this. :-( Divorce is always a difficult situation but it seems that you are both taking it as the adults you are and ending things in good terms. The way you speak of the situation though, I almost want to encourage you both and hope that things work out in your relationship. I am sure the decisions you make are what's best for you and your little one. I am sure you will do just fine as a single student mom; dad's help despite the situation will be such a blessing, especially snce you both still get along. Anything you need, please let us know.
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  • im sorry june :(
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  • Oh, no.  I'm so sorry, June.  You're very strong and I know you'll make it through this.
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  • Oh June!  I"m so sorry you are going through this, and alone.  But like Albah, I too would think maybe another try?  I'm sure you guys have talked about this long and hard.  Stay strong, esp for your little man.  You'll get through this.  ::hugs::
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  • ((hugs))  I know this must be such a difficult decision.  I wish you all the best through this next chapter in your life.  We're always here for you to vent. 
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  • June, it makes me so sad to read this! :( My heart is just breaking for you. The way you are hurting the and way you write that he is hurting also makes me wonder if there is a spark of romantic love hiding somewhere but it does also sound like you guys would have found it by now if it were.

    The important thing is that you guys are doing this in an amicable and healthy way for your son. And in a way that is right for the both of you as individuals and friends. I wish you the best of luck. My heart goes out to you guys.

    ox,

    Mel

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  • June- my heart breaks for you guys. We are always here for you- so if you need to vent, vent away. I hope you find the strength you need to get through this.
  • ::hugs:: 

    June - I'm so, so sorry you're going through this. It breaks my heart that you've had to make this incredibly difficult decision, No one wants to find themselves in this situation, but the truth it that it could happen to anyone. I'm wishing you tons of strength and grace to get through this with your head held high. Please let us know if you need anything at all.

    XOXO 

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  • ((hugs)) I'm sorry June.
  • I'm so sorry, June!   That must be a very difficult decision to make.  However, it does sound like there's still a chance to reignite that spark.  If there is, go for it.  If not, then I wish you the best as you embark on this new part of your life.  You will be a great single mom and student and are lucky to have an involved dad.
  • imagecocojack10:
    Oh June!  I"m so sorry you are going through this, and alone.  But like Albah, I too would think maybe another try?  I'm sure you guys have talked about this long and hard.  Stay strong, esp for your little man.  You'll get through this.  ::hugs::

     

    I agree w/both ladies....it is definitely worth a try to salvage your marriage and family.  It is a tough time, been through a divorce myself, but if things are not as bad as you say they are, maybe you can reconnect and find that spark/love/connection that once brought you together in the first place.  Good luck. 

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  • imagecocojack10:
    Oh June!  I"m so sorry you are going through this, and alone.  But like Albah, I too would think maybe another try?  I'm sure you guys have talked about this long and hard.  Stay strong, esp for your little man.  You'll get through this.  ::hugs::

    I'm so sorry, June. I'm on this boat too. If this aren't "bad" then maybe seeing a marriage counselor or taen steps to hopefully get that spark back? I know it really easy to let that happen in some cases. Alexis and I have been there, that whole "roomate" feeling. But, we worked it out and then we got married. I'm sure if it's gotten to this point then you've gone over all these options. Either way, I'm sure you are both going to do what's best for yourselves and your son. We are all here for you whenever you need us. ::hugs::

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  • Thanks guys!  I feel like I'm in limbo right now.  Too good to leave, too bad to stay.
  • imageMrsJuneHawk:
    Thanks guys!  I feel like I'm in limbo right now.  Too good to leave, too bad to stay.

    I am sorry you are going through this June but what you just said to me, menas you are not done! The love connection is definitly something that can come back but it takes alot alot alot of work. but is it worth it? I totally think so. A counselor wouldnt be a bad idea. I wouldnt give up on both of you quit yet but whatever you decide to do, I know you will get through it. xoxoxo 

     

  • So sorry to read this June, big hugs to you and hope everything can work itself in whichever direction you decide to go. 

    Hugs

    Nat

  • I'm so sorry you are going through this :( Even though it's amicable, I'm sure it's still hard. I think for me that would make it even harder! I hope you guys can work it out! Sending tons of hugs your way!
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  • Sending you good thoughts, June. I'm so sorry :-(
  • I'm so sorry June! *hugs* to you. You have always seemed like a super strong person and I know you will make it through this stage in your life.
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