Ladies with Ferber or CIO success--advice needed

kafunder

We've been trying Ferber for like 2 months now. We'll do it, and then babies will STTN for a few days, but then they go right back to waking up in the middle of the night. We don't need it for bedtime---they go right to sleep drowsy but awake. The problem is they wake up between 2-3am every night and won't go back to sleep on their own (although they'll fall asleep just fine in bed with us if we let them). So, if you've had success with solving this, I'd love any advice. I also have a few questions:

1. When they wake up in the night, do you just start the intervals with that first cry? Or, do you go in and check them and then if they don't settle, then you start the intervals? I read Ferber but didn't see this addressed. We've been going in when they first cry, but maybe that's wrong.

2. Did some of you have more success with just plain CIO/extinction (I've also read HSHHC) than Ferber for night wakings?

3. When we go in to comfort them, we replace the paci. I'm thinking the paci might be part of the problem. I'm considering getting rid of them at night cold turkey, using either Ferber or maybe just moving right to CIO/extinction. Any advice?

When they wake up, they aren't hungry. They go to bed at 6:45pm and nap 2-3 hours per day. We get them up at 5am for a quick bottle, but then put them back down again until 7am (DH and I get ready for work from 5am-7am).

I'm desperate for advice. The middle-of-the-night sleeplessness is killing us.

TriciaandSean

We just started sleep training Monday and have already had huge success.  I was hesitant but have seen extreme results already. 

Like you, our son goes to bed fine it's the night wakings.  He is also still swaddled and gets a paci.  Being swaddled he obviously can't replace himself or suck on his hand for soothing.

With the first cry we set the timer for 5 minutes and wait before going in, I was afraid he would cry the entire time, but he would cry for 30 seconds, fuss a little wait, and than cry again he was definitely testing us.  After 5 minutes we go in and sooth trying not to pick him up (so far we haven't had to pick him up).  I wouldn't leave the room until he was calm with no fussing for 5 minutes.  If he fussed at all I would help him sooth himself.

The next time he cried we waited 10 minutes and than same as above and than the 3rd time we'd wait 15 minutes.  Any other wakings we stuck with 15 minutes.  We didn't go longer than this.

In two days he's gone from waking every hour or 2 (between 10 pm-5 am) to just twice last night.  He's even woken up fussed for 2-3 minutes and put himself back to sleep.  

If he wakes up fussing after 5-6 hours without eating I do feed him though since I figure he's probably hungry.  My main goal is to get rid of the 12-2 wakings and it's definitely working!

hopecounts

We only had to address 1 night wake up and we followed the intervals. We just looked on the video monitor to check her and since she was fine let her cry, which ended up being for ~3 minutes before she went back to sleep on her own.

Ferber was a lifesaver for us I hope it works for you.

TexasBaby10

We saw HUGE improvement in night wakings once our DS learned to fall asleep without the paci.  We did Ferber to teach him to fall asleep without it.  I'll give it to him early in the morning (5 am-ish) and he'll go back to sleep for another hour, but that's the extent of his wakings.  When he was falling asleep with the paci, he was waking about every two hours.

As far a night wakings....I have a hard time letting him cry when he wakes up alone in the dark, so I've always gone to him when he wakes in the night.

abs05

We did Ferber to break the paci and then again to break the swaddle.  Each time it worked amazing--one night of less than 15 minutes of crying.  Lifesaver. 

shibby00

When we sleep trained with Ferber and DD would wake up in the night and cry I would start over again with the first increment of that day, so day 1 I set the timer for 2 mins, day 2 set it for 5 mins, etc.  It took a couple nights for the random night crying to stop.  GL!

holn76

1. Yes, start the interval when you hear them cry. Let them cry 5, 10, 15 whatever your interval is THEN go in and check on them.

2. I did both and extinction worked really well but I had to redo the sleep training recently and did Ferber b/c he is more mobile now and wanted the peace of mind LO wasn't stuck in the corner of the bed or had an arm stuck in the crib rails. I think extinction has less crying.

3. Get rid of the paci at night. It makes for more wake ups. Ferber has a chapter on it. 

Once we eliminated the paci at night we solved 90% of our problems. 

wife1014

Thanks for asking this.  I asked yesterday and no one replied.  I think I have the bump plague...

SammyBeeRivers

Ferber and Weissbluth are totally against giving babies a paci at night. It teaches sleep associations. I think if you get rid of the paci, you'll get rid of your problem. GL

Unknown

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