Would you sleep on a different floor than your LOs? — The Bump
Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

Would you sleep on a different floor than your LOs?

One of my many excuses for putting off TTC is that our house has a bad design for our growing family.  There are 2 bedrooms on the main floor (right now one is mine/Dh's and the other is DD's).  We have a "master suite" upstairs, which is the entire length of the house and has it's own half bath.  Right now we just use that for storage.  Financially DH and I have decided that we can't afford to try and sell our house and upgrade.  So my dilema is this- DD is almost 2 and while we want to start TTC I don't know where we'd put the new baby!

If it was a girl then maybe DD and the newborn girl could share a room (although the erratic sleep schedule of a newborn would probably drive DD crazy for lack of sleep).  DH and I don't want to share our room with the newborn because there's not much space and it didn't work out with DD in there either so that's not really an option. 

I don't want DH and I to move upstairs because then we're very far away from DD (even though there'd be room for a newborn to room with us up there).  What if there was a fire/burglar/etc? But I don't want to move DD upstairs alone for the same reason! Not to mention the hazard the stairs would pose.  Even if we put a gate at the top of the stairs I don't trust that she wouldn't push a peice of furniture up against the half-wall along the stairwell and then fall over (I know, I'm creatively paranoid).

Given a setup like this, what have you/what would you do?  I hate to put off TTC but when I resolve all of my other fears about having a newborn again I am still faced with this dilema. TIA!

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Re: Would you sleep on a different floor than your LOs?

  • DD is upstairs, and we are downstairs. It's never been a problem. I say just go for it, you'll figure something out.
    S- March 09 E- Feb 12 L- May 15


  • I would prefer not to for the reasons you mentioned but then one side of me thinks it is all silly. Is something really going to happen to my child because I sleep on a different floor? Probably not but probably isn't an absolute. I would be more concerned having a kid that isn't confined to a crib and could get up and wander the house while I was asleep.
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  • I would move upstairs since the master bedroom seems large enough.  Maybe with the extra space, the new LO could sleep in your bedroom.  Either way, I would be weary of having your toddler and a newborn in the same room because of newborn's sleep pattern. 

    My advice, move upstairs, leave DD downstairs with a monitor.  When the new LO is old enough, move that child downstairs as well. 

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  • I'm also paranoid and wouldn't move DD upstairs.

    What I would do is:  H and I move upstairs while the new baby is small? (until 4-5 mo)

    Then move baby #2 with your D, share room and make upstairs room a playroom, while going back to your actual room.

    Does your DD STTN?

     

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  • I grew up upstairs, my parents were downstairs.

    Keep batteries in your smoke detectors and lock your doors.  :P  Seriously, there's nothing you'd be able to do for your daughter on the same floor that you can't on different floors...  I think it's totally fine to be on seperate floors.

  • imageMarMat:

    I'm also paranoid and wouldn't move DD upstairs.

    What I would do is:  H and I move upstairs while the new baby is small? (until 4-5 mo)

    Then move baby #2 with your D, share room and make upstairs room a playroom, while going back to your actual room.

    Does your DD STTN?

     

    Yep she STTN- but she's also in a crib right now.  I have been slow to make the transition to the toddler bed.  But we'll be doing that transition soon, so maybe that will change the dynamic?  I don't know... I'm really lost with the whole thing.
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  • That is a tough situation.  Personally if I was concerned I would have the two share a room on the same floor as me and DH, at least until they are a little older.  We had DD in a bassinet in our room for four months.  You mentioned that due to space that did not work for you.  During the newborn stage could you share a room with the newborn upstairs and have DH sleep down stairs with DD? Do you have an extra room down stairs say a dining room that is not used?  My grandmother had an eat-in kitchen and when my grandfather got sick she turned the dining room temporarily into a bedroom so that he could be on one floor. 

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  • imagesnicksnack:

    That is a tough situation.  Personally if I was concerned I would have the two share a room on the same floor as me and DH, at least until they are a little older.  We had DD in a bassinet in our room for four months.  You mentioned that due to space that did not work for you.  During the newborn stage could you share a room with the newborn upstairs and have DH sleep down stairs with DD? Do you have an extra room down stairs say a dining room that is not used?  My grandmother had an eat-in kitchen and when my grandfather got sick she turned the dining room temporarily into a bedroom so that he could be on one floor. 

    There's nowhere else we could really use for a bedroom.  We have a finished basement but there's no safety windows that we could crawl out incase of a fire so it'd be a firetrap.  Otherwise the two small bedrooms on our main floor and the upstairs suite are it. 

    My biggest issue (other than the lack of space) with putting a newborn in the room with DH and I was that I couldn't relax when DD was in there as a newborn.  i kept listening to her and watching her that I couldn't sleep.  I am so high strung I figure it would be the same the next time around.  But I don't want to distrupt DD and put the newborn in her room for fear of DD's sleeping schedule......argh!

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  • imageDEBBIE33CASEY:

    One of my many excuses for putting off TTC is that our house has a bad design for our growing family.  There are 2 bedrooms on the main floor (right now one is mine/Dh's and the other is DD's).  We have a "master suite" upstairs, which is the entire length of the house and has it's own half bath.  Right now we just use that for storage.  Financially DH and I have decided that we can't afford to try and sell our house and upgrade.  So my dilema is this- DD is almost 2 and while we want to start TTC I don't know where we'd put the new baby!

    If it was a girl then maybe DD and the newborn girl could share a room (although the erratic sleep schedule of a newborn would probably drive DD crazy for lack of sleep).  DH and I don't want to share our room with the newborn because there's not much space and it didn't work out with DD in there either so that's not really an option. 

    I don't want DH and I to move upstairs because then we're very far away from DD (even though there'd be room for a newborn to room with us up there).  What if there was a fire/burglar/etc? But I don't want to move DD upstairs alone for the same reason! Not to mention the hazard the stairs would pose.  Even if we put a gate at the top of the stairs I don't trust that she wouldn't push a peice of furniture up against the half-wall along the stairwell and then fall over (I know, I'm creatively paranoid).

    Given a setup like this, what have you/what would you do?  I hate to put off TTC but when I resolve all of my other fears about having a newborn again I am still faced with this dilema. TIA!

    This is us except we have been letting DD sleep in the other end of our master upstairs since she was born and we need to move her to her own room. All we can do is like the PP said. Check all the alarm batteries and lock all the doors. I am putting a gate in her bedroom door so she can't get out of her room with out one of us and keeping the monitor on. When we do have another LO we plan leaving that baby upstairs until he/she STTN and then purchasing a double video monitor. Its not the best situation but we are old and in the TTC now or never boat.

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  • I'm sure you will figure it out.

    Moms and babies (I mean toddlers) adapt very easily. Eventually your D will learn to sleep with her sibling noises and later in life make pajama parties.. LOL!

    I think you need to work in really wanting a sibling (remember those newborn months go away fast!) and you also have a toddler to attend. Time will go faster.. Smile If you are convinced, things will work around.

    I'm also thinking on TTC, like starting in 6 months.. I fear for those 3 first months, but I'm trying to talk to myself that if DD is older, it would be more difficult for me to go back to the "boring" stage. So I would like to go through it fast.  Just a thought.

    I hope you get to find peace with your decision

    GL!

     

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  • Ideally, I would like all bedrooms on the same level.  Eventually kids are potty trained and using the bathroom at night and I don't like not being able to hear what they are doing if I am on a different level.   At some point they also are able to get out of bed and come to your room when they are sick or need something.  I don't like the ideas of kids going up and downstairs to get to me. 

    If I had to have bedrooms on different levels, I could get ok with the master being downstairs and kids being upstairs though.  I would never buy a house where the master is up and children would have to be on the main level.  The potential for a burglarly scares me.  Also the fact that DH and I would be up and making noise n the 1st level while the kids are sleeping, doesn't make it seem functional. 

    In your situation, I'd probably move the older child upstairs and have the nursery down with you.  Once both kids were old enough to share a room, I'd probably move them both up since it sounds like that room is large.  Is there anyway to do a remodel and turn the 2 bedrooms downstairs into a master suite and make the upstairs two bedrooms with a shared bath?  That would work better for you and be significantly better for resale too when the time comes.

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  • We are downstairs in the master and DS is upstairs, along with the guest room.  No issues with the set up.  In fact, we prefer it this way.
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  • I can't even get my kid out of my bed, never mind on another floor.....  Embarrassed

     

    Like many PP said, I would suggest having the new baby sleep in your room until he/she is ready to share a room with your older daughter.

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  • Honestly, I've never understood this concern. DD has always been a floor above us. Its never been a problem. If anything, its nice because her room is right above us and we can hear her through the ceiling.

     

    Maybe I'll understand when she's older, but as of now, I'm not concerned. If I'm worried about stairs, I'll leave a monitor in her room so she can call us if she needs something.

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  • Our house is set up the same way except we have 1 bedroom downstairs and the large suite upstairs. DS in on the 1st floor and we are on the second, its not that far we've all adjusted. I had him in the basinet until 4months so I didn't have to take the stairs multiple times a night.
  • I would. I think it's fine. Get a good baby monitor, move upstairs and room in with the baby for a few months before moving her downstairs into her own room.
  • We are house hunting and many of the house we are looking at has the master on the 1st floor and the others on the 2nd.  I do plan on staying downstairs in tha master if we get one of these homes.  So yes, would stay on a different floor.  The new baby (hopefully soon!) would stay in our room for as long as possible (a few months).
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