I'm finally breaking down... (long...sorry)

ShangriLaRose

and vent-worrying on here.

I don't post my own original posts really, mostly because I haven't felt a need. But now I've hit the point where I really need to.

I had to have a c/s w/ my DS, which I was fine with at the time. He was breech, and we tried everything to get him to turn, including an external version, and he just wouldn't budge. No big deal. He came out perfectly healthy, and all seemed to be perfect. About 5 days after we went home from the hospital, I got really sick. Long story short: I had a septic blood clot, was in the hospital for 2 weeks, and then was at home on IV antibiotics for another month and a half before the clot broke up and went away. It was a miserable experience, and was also very hard on my poor DS. 

They told me that my chances of having this happen again go up every time I have a c/s... or any other major surgery, for that matter. I am lucky, and very thankful, that I have very VBAC supportive doctors. They've been very honest with me, and have answered any and all of my questions thus far. They even informed me that we will be scheduling a c-section date in advance, as a precautionary measure, at my next appointment at the end of this month.  (Because it is a military medical facility, it is easier for them to schedule an OR in advance, and cancel... than the other way around. Makes sense to me, and I'm fine with that.)

 At my appointment last week, we had another U/S (I'm considered high-risk because of what happened after my C/S w/ DS... while I'm at higher risk of blood clots w/ surgery, it can actually occur any time.) She's breech just like DS was, and she's BIGGER than he was at this point in pregnancy. (which means she'll run out of room sooner than DS did, if she keeps growing at this same rate she has been... constantly measuring ahead.)

So I'm freaking out that I'm going to be doomed to an RCS. I know it's out of my control,... and I've been trying to mentally prepare myself for either eventuality. (VBAC or CS.) But I am just SO SCARED of getting sick like that again. Not only for this LO, but for my DS and husband too. I was VERY sick then, and with the odds being high that it could happen again, I'm just terrified.

Thanks for sitting through this... I just really needed to try to get it off my brain. Want a cookie? Or some ice cream? 

kimbo1216

I have nothing helpful to say.  I just wanted you to know I did read your story and pray it all works out and you get your VBAC.  Remember though, if you have to have an RCS, you are not necessarily doomed to have the repeat clot.  I know your chance are high, but they are not certain.

Best wishes and keep us posted.

ashleah83

Awww I am so sorry.  I can definitely understand why you are so stressed out about this.  T&P that baby turns around and all goes well for you!

EMLYNNLERETTE

I am so sorry you are feeling so stressed!  If you haven't already, check out spinningbabies.com for options to turn your baby.  One thing they mentioned is Moxabustion (or moxibustion) and as crazy as it sounds, my midwife said it is extremely effective.  You have my T&P's as well!

OctoberCAPA

No advice, but I'll pray that the baby turns and you can avoid an RCS.  It sounds like a really tough situation and I'm glad you have good doctors.  Your DH and DS will support you no matter what.  And we're always here to listen.  

MommaA117

I'm so sorry. I really hope for you that you do end up able to do VBAC and have no complications this time. Would they not induce beofre she got to a too big point? (If she were to turn around of course)

Sazhrah

I have heard a lot of women recommend spinningbabies.com. Also, keep in mind that your body generally wont make a baby you can't birth. It might make it harder but definately not impossible. The VBAC board was very very helpful to me when I was thinking of a VBAC.

I will keep you in my thoughts and pray that you get your successful VBAC and that your doctor (even though military) will continue to support you in this.

pbj10

I am really sorry for everything that you are going through. I know that the uncertainty makes it harder to deal with. I pray that everything goes well, for your health, for your LO's health, and for your family.

TashaK2011

Goodluck with everything and I will keep you in my T&P, hopefully she will turn soon. As scary as it is to think the blood clot could happen again, at least this time they are aware of the risk and can be better prepared. We are here to listen any time!

brobin01

ending T&P's your way. I'm hoping for a miracle!!

sunshine336

Pretty much what the other ladies said- I don't have any helpful advice but I hope it all works out for you.  Glad you were able to get it off your chest.  

And I would like ice cream on top of a giant cookie  

AshleyPT

I know some women in my Bradley class had success with chiropractors and the Webster technique to turn breached babies.  Maybe look in to that?

gymnst1013

That is scary!!  I'm sorry you had to go through it.  I really hope this birth is perfectly smooth with no complications for you. (((hugs)))

ShangriLaRose

Thanks ladies! I just really needed to spill all that before I imploded or something. That would have been really messy, and I really try not to do that to my poor husband very often. He really hates it when I cry. It makes him feel helpless. lol 

EMLYNN: I've never heard of that website, but you can bet that as soon as I'm done doing my homework this afternoon, I'll go take a look and see what it says! I'll try just about anything.Thank you for telling me about it!

Other than this board, the only other board I post on is VBAC, and mostly when I just have questions. The ladies there have been really helpful, and it's encouraging to see many sucess stories. 

APRIL: as to your question... that is something I"m going to be asking them at my next appointment on the 27th, since that's when we're doing my joint consult for both VBAC and CS. While I would really prefer not to induce (as it is known to lower the success rate for VBAC), I'll try it if they think it would be best, and as long as it's safe for LO and I.

marchmay

I am sorry your first L&D/ postpartum experience was so traumatic. I totally understand your concerns and fears this time around. 

You still have time for DD to turn-- I feel like they start worrying if baby hasn't turned by thirty-five weeks.

Keeping my fingers crossed that she turns and that you get the VBAC you're hoping for!