Military Families

UGH! It's not even Christmas yet...

We have 3 families to rotate for christmas and last year was my parents year. Well In laws get all B!tchy about it, but whatever. They are never happy even though they know the agreement.

So this year my dh is getting deployed and will be gone for Christmas so I am moving in with my parents during the time.

I was repacking some christmas decorations today and I say something to the effect of "well I won't need this until next next year since chris will be gone" and mil says "oh well FIL is already worried that, he said "so does this mean we wont get christmas morning AGAIN?"

dude, you are kidding me right?? My dh will freakin not only miss Christmas with everyone but he misses our new ds's first Christmas and all those milestones, You want to B!tch about who gets Christmas morning?? SO freakin petty!!! I was pissed!!!   Like I need that stress?! argh!!!

 

 

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Re: UGH! It's not even Christmas yet...

  • Just stick to your plan. If they don't like it, tough. DH and I are from the same area. When we were dating, we spent the majority of our time with his family because HE was visiting and I wasn't. When we got married, I was visiting too, so time was split. My MIL just assumed that she was the center of the universe, and we would still spend our time with her. Before we came home for Christmas, we told both families our plan. My family always celebrates in the early afternoon, and his in the evening. MIL purposely changed her plan so we couldn't be there and so she'd have something to complain about. When we didn't show up at her new time, but instead stuck to our plan, she refused to speak to us for the rest of our trip. There was always drama when we came home, but we stuck to OUR plan. No matter what, someone will feel short changed.
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  • I agree stick to your plan. Stay with your family! It's less stress! I deal with the same thing sharing our time that we're home with 3 families.. Except my family lives up north and DH's family lives in Tx/Ar.. Last summer I went home to see my family while DH was deployed and DH's MOM flipped out that we didn't see her first... My parents paid for our tickets to come and were watching my pets plus, I get along with them.. Who  you think I want to see first psyco b... Not that I'm bitter or anything.. Stick to your plan! You'll be happier and so will your LOs!
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  • I am in the same boat. why do crazy MIL think you are going to spend Christmas with them when their son isnt even there???!?!?

    Married 11/27/09 and TTC right away
    Dx: Complete septate uterus with cervical duplication, endometrial polyps, PCOS, endometriosis, hypo thyroid, luteal phase defect
    4 uterus surgeries to correct my complete septum and to remove polyps and 2 years of seeing the RE, medicated cycles and IUIs
    Baby 1 and 2: BFP 3/3/11 with 2 babies EDD 11/1/11, M/C 4/6/11
    Baby #3: 8/11 pregnant EDD 4/27/11 and m/c:(
    Baby #4: 10/12/11 BFP! EDD 6/16/12m/c 10/26/11
    Baby #5: 3/13/12 BFP! EDD 11/25/12 ANOTHER m/c :(

    Baby #6: 2/14/13- BFP! EDD 10/24/13, CP 2/19/13
    Baby #7: 3/15/13- BFP! EDD 11/27/13, another CP
    Baby #8.  BFP 5/19/13 EDD 1/22/14. 8 was not our lucky number

    4th septum resection on 5/31/13.
    Baby #9: 6/29/13 BFP. C section scheduled for March 5th!

    My miracle baby was born March 5 at 9:33am. He was 8 lbs 12.5 oz and 21.25 inches long!

    image"">

  • This is one of the reasons why we don't rotate Christmas any more.  We spend Christmas Eve and Day at our home with our children.  We started our own traditions.  We travel to visit anyone after that.  People griped about it at first, but they got over it.  Why should kids have to spend every Christmas being carted back and forth to someone else's house?  We didn't think it was fair to our kids. 


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  • We don't travel to visit family at Christmas. They are welcome to come see us, but we don't deal with the drama...and we have started our own family traditions. We have shared CHristmas with DH's family for the past two years, but they live where we are stationed right now. My parents came up to visit last Christmas. This Christmas I think we're going to drive through California and just celebrate as a family. DD's first Christmas we told both families that we wanted to celebrate her first Christmas as a family and we went to Disneyland. Best Christmas ever! Do what you want to and the families will deal :)
  • image ufsandra85:
    I am in the same boat. why do crazy MIL think you are going to spend Christmas with them when their son isnt even there???!?!?

     I would still go spend Christmas with my IL's even if R was deployed.  If it is their turn you should stick with the rotation, they have been looking forward to it.  I have made two or three trips just to see my IL's when R was gone.  They are your family too. 

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  • my MIL is crazy and is mean to me. My husband doesnt even like to visit her and has advised me to not have contact with her unless he can monitor her words and actions

    Married 11/27/09 and TTC right away
    Dx: Complete septate uterus with cervical duplication, endometrial polyps, PCOS, endometriosis, hypo thyroid, luteal phase defect
    4 uterus surgeries to correct my complete septum and to remove polyps and 2 years of seeing the RE, medicated cycles and IUIs
    Baby 1 and 2: BFP 3/3/11 with 2 babies EDD 11/1/11, M/C 4/6/11
    Baby #3: 8/11 pregnant EDD 4/27/11 and m/c:(
    Baby #4: 10/12/11 BFP! EDD 6/16/12m/c 10/26/11
    Baby #5: 3/13/12 BFP! EDD 11/25/12 ANOTHER m/c :(

    Baby #6: 2/14/13- BFP! EDD 10/24/13, CP 2/19/13
    Baby #7: 3/15/13- BFP! EDD 11/27/13, another CP
    Baby #8.  BFP 5/19/13 EDD 1/22/14. 8 was not our lucky number

    4th septum resection on 5/31/13.
    Baby #9: 6/29/13 BFP. C section scheduled for March 5th!

    My miracle baby was born March 5 at 9:33am. He was 8 lbs 12.5 oz and 21.25 inches long!

    image"">

  • Last Christmas was the last year we will travel as a whole family to visit anyone for Christmas. This year we are staying home. The only time I will travel for Christmas will be when DH is deployed and then I will be going to my families house. DH was hauled all over every Christmas as a child and he hated it. He refuses to do that to his children.
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