Natural Birth
brianamah
member
All my natural birth friends wound up with epidurals
brianamah
member
I've had a few girlfriends who, while pregnant, had every intention of a natural birth. One studied hypnobirthing, one had a doula she worked with, a few said they were doing it natural at the hospital.
In the end ALL of them wound up with an epidural. And not only that, but they all seemed to have the tone of "Oh you HAVE to get the epidural."
Yikes! For those of you who've already been through the process, any thoughts on this? Did you want to change your birthplan during labor? How'd you stick to your guns?
thnx
-b
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Re: All my natural birth friends wound up with epidurals
I remember thinking twice when I was in labor, "I can understand why women get epidurals." But even with that thought, I was still not tempted to get one, so no I never wanted to change my Birth Plan.
I did hypnobirthing which helped a ton, plus I read about a lot of natural forms of pain relief (birthing ball, warm bath, tennis balls on the back, etc). I also decided that I did not want to know how dilated I was. So when I got to the hospital they checked me, but I told them I didn't want to know how far along I was. I figured I would be done when my baby was in my arms and it didn't matter how dilated I was. So I just took it one surge at a time and tried not to think ahead to the next one.
Just stay focused! You can do it!
I had 2 clients that BEGGED for the epidural during transition, but once we found ways to distract/relieve SOME of the pain, they got through it. Everyone needs to be centered by the time it gets really bad, and reminded why they chose to have a natural birth. Both of those clients said even though they begged for that epi, they are so glad they did not get it, and will do natural again.
just have plenty of techniques ready. You may be the woman who needs it completely quiet and no one touching you to get through it. You may be the one that needs accupressure, or distractions or...you just gotta be open. You can do it.
My thought on this is that people underestimate how much is actually working against you when try to have a med-free, low-intervention birth in a typical US hospital. I know that's what happened to me and I had worked in L&D before I got pregnant. So I can imagine what it's like for people who don't really know what hospitals are like until they set foot in one during labor.
For me it wasn't that I wanted to change my birth plan, it was that I got tired of fighting the system while trying to cope with labor. And nurses and doctors are more educated and they are authority figures, so it can be hard to resist interventions when those authorities are continuously pushing them on you.
With DS, I got to 7cm and then asked for an epidural. This was around 6 or 7 in the morning. It took me until 3:00 in the afternoon to get to 10, and my epidurals (yep, 2) did not work they way I expected. I hated the experience. I will not be getting one again. Had I known then that I was probably beginning transition, I would not have gotten the epidural. However, going into it, my thought process was "no drugs, but an epi is fine." In a way, by saying that, I was setting myself up to get an epidural as soon as it got too hard.
Some women have a great epidural experience; they are able to relax and dilate more quickly. That was not the case for me.
This exactly. I knew what I wanted and there was no way anything could change my mind.
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I don't want this to come out wrong, because I don't know your friends, and I don't know any other woman's situation, but...
I think a lot of the women I've talked to who "wanted to go natural" but wound up with an epidural did not plan ahead very well. By that I mean, they decided beforehand they didn't want an epidural but didn't research or practice any positioning, relaxation techniques, pain relief, etc. nor did they research hospital policies so that they could ask for a heplock and intermittent monitoring, and lastly, they didn't make sure they found a provider that supported them.
While it's definitely possible to just tough it out with no preparation, I think it's a little misleading when women who didn't prepare well say "Oh I wanted to go natural too, but you'll totally need an epidural."
Don't get discouraged! Their experience is not yours, you can do this!
eta: I hope that didn't come out judgey, I really didn't want it to =(
Coming from a different perspective, I gave birth in a hospital and when I went in I told them I didn't really want an epidural but if it got too bad, I was open to it (keep in mind that this was after 20 hours of constant back labour). At our hospital there is only 1 anisthesiologist (sp??) and once he/she leaves for the night there is no more option for an epidural, so I had to make my decision by 10:30 pm. By that point I had had 25 hours of back labour and no sleep. Regardless of that though, the nurses only mentioned an epidural to me twice. Once when I originally told them that I didn't want it and once to say that the anisthesiologist was just finishing up with his last surgery, so I had to decide now. During the 5 hours in between that, there was no mention of anything except other possible options (shower, laughing gas, sterile water drops, different positions, etc....) for pain relief. So not all hospitals push the epidural immediately.
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I'm not talking about pushing epidurals immediately. I'm talking about the myriad ways that hospital management of labor in a typical L&D ward interferes with natural childbirth. And by "natural childbirth" I'm not just talking about whether you had an epidural or not. I'm talking about the normal emotional and physiological processes of labor and vaginal birth happening unhindered.
No one ever pushed an epidural on me either. What I'm talking about goes way beyond that.
I understand what you are saying completely. With that said, I went in with every intention of a natural labor and delivery. I went to Bradley classes, read a million books and discussed it a million times with my midwife. I felt 100% prepared, but you can't ever really prepare yourself for it as it's so unpredictable. I ended up being induced due to pre-e and had a very difficult and complicated labor which led me to get an api after 20 hours of hard labor. In those 20 hours I only dialated to 3 centimeters. I was exhausted and worried I wouldn't be able to have enough energy to push. I got an epi and within 2 hours was fully dialated. I pushed for 3 hours with no success and eventually had to use a vacuum. I don't regret my decision to get the epi. Without it I would never have had those 2 hours to rest and prepare for the three hours of pushing. After all of that, I will say that I would never tell someone "they MUST get an epi" as I did it out of desperation. I hope that with my next pregnancy I'm able to go into labor naturally and have a natural labor and delivery.
Oh, I totally understand what you're saying! Along with being possible to tough it out without preparation, it's definitely possible to be VERY well prepared but still get an epi. Again, no judgment here at all, I was just commenting on the situation that I often see.
I apologize for my mis-understanding. However, I never felt any of the other hinderences either, but with me being in Canada that may be why.
Daughter #1 - February 12, 2010
natural m/c March 11, 2011 at 8 1/2 weeks
Daughter #2 - January 11, 2012
Ectopic pregnancy discovered November 6, 2012 at 6 weeks
Daughter #3 - January 19, 2014
Started our exploration into the world of international adoption June 2012. We have no idea what this is going to look like but we are excited to find out!
I'm glad you didn't have that issue. I hope more hospitals will change and be like the one you delivered at.
And yeah definitely don't know much about how they do things in other countries. I hope it's better in Canada.
this exactly for me too.
i have two friends who wanted natural births. both of them ended up with epidurals for their first kids and didn't feel very positive about it. but then both went med-free with their second babies.
I kinda do agree with this. I really didn't think labor was that unbearable, but it was definitely nothing I would have gone in with no preparation or only a half-baked drive to do it. A lot of the women that said they'd "try going natural" rarely managed all the way through. But then again, I never got the sense they were very dedicated to the idea. Like "If I can run this marathon, fabulous! If I can't, whatever, can't do everything"
As far as the hospital, not all hospitals are full of drug pushers. I never once asked for pain meds, nor was it ever offered to me at any point. It might have helped that the nurse didn't hang around much to watch me suffer (OK with me, I wasn't suffering) The only time pain meds even came up was one visit with anesthesiology on check in. Even they never breathed a word of "are you suuuure?" They just took the med history they needed and said that if I didn't ask for meds, it would be the last time I'd ever see the guy. He was right. Never saw him again.
After I had DD I said I would do it again, but I wouldn't begrudge any woman her epidural. That being said, I'm about to do it again, and I'm actually looking forward to it.
I have 5 close friends who have had natural births in the last year. None of them begged for an epi and none of them regretted it.
My honest advice.... Don't have your baby in a hospital if you don't want to be pressured to get an epidural. Look into a birth center. Hospitals are NOT natural birth friendly.
I had my baby with no drugs what so ever and it really wasn't that big of a deal. Yeah, it was uncomfortable, but not the end of the world.
I had a homebirth with my 2nd baby. I KNEW what to expect and even so thought a couple times "WTF was I thinking?????"
Id do it a million times though and have decided ALL future babies will be homebirths.
I'm in New Zealand, and so I know our hospitals here have a different approach to many American hospitals.
I birthed in a hospital, but it was basically just me, DH and my MW in the room, until she got a consultant to come check if an episiotomy was needed. The OB took one look and said, "oh no just a couple of good pushes and she'll be fine."
Anyway, back to the point of my story...
I didn't do any special research beyond a basic ante natal class which covered all aspects of birth and all interventions, as well as some ideas on natural pain relief like massage and water.
I read one book about yoga, which I half heartedly did some exercises twice. I'm kinda lazy like that.
I didn't have the epi. I never once wanted the epi, or thought about it, or had to be talked down from having one, I simply didn't hit that wall.
I did at one point think, "God this is awful and I still have that transition thing to go through." in hindsight I was in transition when I thought this.
I was in early labour for a day and a half, and in active labour for 7 hours.
I did have a saline drip put in at some point.
So my view of it is that the prep you need, depends on the environment you will be birthing in. I didn't have to fight hospital policy, or have to think of different ways to position myself because hospitals here are so natural friendly and my midwife suggested the shower and then the tub.
I also think everyone experiences the pain differently, and the length of your labour can make a huge difference to how exhausted you are, and your ability to push through.
And finally, if you want, I can be your friend and then you'll know someone who planned to go epi free, and did.
Elizabeth 5yrs old Jane 3yrs old
Blanket statements against hospitals aren't fair. There are some really great hospitals out there that are natural-birth friendly. I don't think they're the majority, but they do exist. And I don't think it is always helpful to tell a woman to just go birth somewhere else because a lot of women don't have the choice to birth anywhere else for any number of reasons.
I don't have the option to birth outside of a hospital because I am a military dependent living overseas. I have to go to the military hospital for my health care. Sure, I could attempt to navigate the Italian system on my own. But I'm not fluent in the Italian language as it pertains to medical care and pregnancy (that sort of stuff just doesn't come up in language classes!). If I tried to go out in town on my own, a translator would not be provided by my insurer. And the closest midwives are an hour or two away anyway. And that's not a time frame I'm comfortable with because I had a rather fast first labor and know that subsequent labors can go even faster. Telling me to go have my baby somewhere other than a hospital does me no good. Telling me my hospital's policies and learning my care provider's tendencies and learning how to discuss my desires with my birth team so that we're all on the same page - that does me some good.
This. If you want a hospital birth, then I would recommend staying home as long as possible.
I was dreaming of an epidural when I told my H it was time to go to the hospital. I thought "I can't taken much more of this."
I was in transition. I found out that I was 9.5 centimeters dilated when I got to the hospital! After I found that out I knew I could do it without meds.
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First off, know that you CAN do it. And it can be great! Unmedicated birth is an awesome goal!
Your post makes me want to share my story because--to be honest--I looked down a little on people who changed their plans during birth and I wish that I had more perspective on the "giving in" issue beforehand. I didn't know that an epidural could have a genuine medical benefit during labor until I was faced with it. I also kind of don't want to share, because I want you to see unmedicated birth as doable and wonderful and be encouraged. But since you asked, I'll lay it all out...
I did everything "right" for my hospital birth--loads of reading, Bradley classes, hired a doula, labored at home until contractions were 2 min apart and I was unable to talk through them (8 hours into labor). When my labor shockingly stalled after 20 hours in the hospital, I went home rather than get pitocin. I returned 8 hours later when contractions were 2 min apart again and I was unable to talk through them again. It turned out that LO was OP which was the cause of my terrible back labor and the strange progression and regression of my labor. Even then, the drs and nurses never mentioned an epidural to me. They were respectful of my wishes.
At 55 hours into labor, LO seemed stuck because of his position and my strength was giving out. A c-section was becoming a reality unless we could get LO to flip. The dr wanted to try two low-tech things to move LO: side laying for as long as I could bear it and then manually/internally trying to flip LO. Because of my extreme pelvic separation since 24w PG, side lying was unbearably excruciating for me. At that point, an epidural became the medically advisable path to the lowest-intervention birth, as it would allow me to lay on my side for an extended period of time to encourage LO to move. Still no dr. brought it up. After careful consideration with our doulas and DH, I asked for one. It was a heart-wrenching decision. In the end, the epidural facilitated LO shifting enough to descend. He was born vaginally after 63 hours of labor.
I rethink that epidural all the time. He still came out OP, so obviously my body COULD do it. But, the epidural may have loosened me up more and it allowed me to try everything we could rather than having a c/s. Also, it turns out that long with back labor was harmful to my body. My SI joint in my back is still inflamed and I have daily pain 12 weeks PP that is requiring chiro and PT care.
While my sincerest hope for you is that you will have an unmedicated delivery and a birth that lives up to all of your hopes and dreams, just remember that a change of plans can come from a place of wisdom and greater health for you and baby. This is where a doula is invaluable. I thought about an epi earlier in labor just because of pain, and DH and the doula helped me get through that with relaxation, water, breathing, etc. For me, the epi ended up being about medical benefit rather than pain management and no one had ever told me that epis could have benefits like that in extreme cases.
More Green For Less Green
I'm curious why you're on this board and specifically this thread. While your comment might be honest, I think PP is looking for support.
I had a wonderful med-free, non-pushy birth at a hospital. It's possible.
Much like other posters have said, you have to go in with some preparation and the mindset of "my body is made for this. I can do it!"
The best thing we did was hire a doula. It's pricey but sooooooooooo worth it!!!
I don't think there was anything wrong with her post. Maybe she's on this board because--crazy thought here--she's interested in discussing natural birth. It's not like she said "Get an epidural, you're crazy not to!!!"
This may be true with a lot of hospitals, but not all. I gave birth in a hospital and the 'E' word was not even mentioned, I was never denied food/drink, I could move/push as I wanted, nobody ever told me when to push or for how long, a hep-lock wasn't even offered to me, no Pit after delivery. That's how pro-natural my hospital was and I was in the main hospital (this wasn't a birthing center).
The only thing that was limiting was that they only did water labors (I couldn't deliver in the tub), and when I got to the hospital I had to do twenty minutes of continuous monitoring. I would deliver at this hospital again in a second, so not all hospitals are anti-med-free births.
I was just about to say pretty much what Iris did, but she beat me to it.
I wanted to echo what pixieprincss said. Labor is a very unpredictable thing. I went in armed with the best possible chance of having a medfree birth. I took a childbirth class that combined aspects of bradley, yoga and hypobirthing, I used the hospital birth center (free standing birth centers are essentially illegal in my state), had a great support team and had visualized a positive, calm birth experience for months. I KNEW I could give birth naturally. Labor had other plans.
I experienced 50 hours of excruciating back labor and through it all never dilated past 6 cm. My contractions would last for minutes on end, and sitting or laying down was impossible. I hadn't slept in two and a half days. I knew at that point an epidural was the only way for me to give birth vaginally so we transferred to a standard L&D room (we did try pit for several hours in the regular room before I ended up with the epi). The epi let me relax and dilate the rest of the way. Unfortunately, I was unable to push my DS out, even though the epi was turned down so I could get into a squatting position, and I eventually had to have a c/s. In total I labored for 63 hours.
I don't want to discourage you. I wholehearted believe that most women are entirely capable of being able to labor without medication. It is extremely important to prepare yourself for a natural birth by reading, taking classes, and putting yourself in a positive environment with good support. My labor was very long and difficult. There were times when my mom or husband left the room in tears because of the pain I was in. Despite all of that, I intend on trying for a natural VBAC in the future because I still KNOW that it I can do it.
I think many of the PPs, particularly those with complications in their labor stories, have excellent points. There is a reason epidurals exisist, and I think the question isn't why would you get one but why is it the standard proceedure.
And on the note of begging for the epidural, I'll say this: I did it. I didn't get one, but I cried and told my husband I needed one. And looking back, I wasn't really saying, please start a cascade of interventions into my labor. I was saying, please let this pain stop because I'm too tired to deal with it anymore and I don't know anything that will stop it OTHER than an epidural, because walking, swaying, positive touching, the birth ball, water, breathing, visioning and pretty much everything else isn't working.
The problem is that when a woman says that at home or at a birthing center or with a doula and midwife, they know it's probably part of transition. When you say it at most hospitals, they page for the drugs. I think that's why most of your friends ended up with the drugs. Not because they couldn't do it, but because they didn't have the support to get them through that moment.
This was what I was thinking when I read the OP. My friend who is a L&D nurse says that when women come in to have a "natural birth" they take bets to see if she will actually make it, because without proper preparation and education it's a really hard thing to do. I think a lot of moms aren't completely committed to a natural delivery upon entering the hospital, so when the rough patches hit they look for an easy fix.
agree 100%
How did I convince myself to stay home? I was confident that my body was built to handle labor and that I didn't need to be at the hospital. I was also confident that I was more relaxed and the experience was more pleasant at home.
When I did go to the hospital I was greeted by the grouchiest, least natural birth friendly doctor possible, who immediately insisted on a saline lock (even though I was already at a 10) and refused to deliver LO from a squatting position. Wench. glad I waited to go instead of being there fighting with this doctor the whole time.
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This is it exactly!!! My Dr. left the practice 2 weeks before my due date and the WHOLE time I was pregnant I figured I'd get an epi. I transferred to a midwife and she was telling me about water birthing without any drugs and I really liked that idea! After 23 hours of labor the nurses kept pushing for an epi and I gave in (I was sooooo tired!). I absolutey hated the experience! I felt this sharp pai when he placed the epi. and thought "O, DEAR GOD, don't let me be paralyzed!" you have to hae someone move you if you want to move, couldn't feel wen you needed to push...it just sucked! This time I've been training my mind and body for 6 months to do this naturally and I will succeed!
Yep. Hospitals that are truly natural birth friendly are the exception, not the norm. And I bet if you compared low risk births in those hospitals to low risk births at a freestanding birth center, you'd still find far higher cesarean and intervention rates (birth center transfers would have to be counted in the birth center tab, not the hospital tab obviously) with no improvement in outcomes.