wish I had some "me" time

sarahjared

The only time I seem to get to myself is when I pump (after starting daycare DS decided my boobs weren't fast enough and only wants bottles).  I work 9-10 hours a day and then usually have the kids by myself at night (DH works weird hours).  I deal with dinner, baths, and bedtimes.  When that is over I have stuff to do around the house (laundry, dishes, you know).  I only get around 5 hours of sleep a night.  Tired of still looking pg but don't know when in the hell I am supposed to do anything about it.  I don't have time for any hobbies or working out.  There has got to be a way to balance my life but I can't figure it out.  Oh, and getting up earlier isn't an option as I already get up at 5am every day. 

What is even more frustrating is that DH has time to workout.  I'm glad that he is fit and hot but I feel like a cow compared to him (or anyone really).  Doesn't help that he sells a fitness program as a side job so he is on the computer talking to fit, hot chicks several times a week.  Nothing inappropriate-just work stuff but I feel like I will never achieve what they look like.

Just needed to vent this out.  So frustrated and irritated I could cry or hit something.  I'm sure the steroid pack for my root canal isn't helping me and my emotions at all.

knmommy

(((hugs)))  I know the feeling.  I need to lose some weight, no time, and with my health right now don't know how. 

Why do you need a steroid pack for your root canal???  I'm sorry.  I had mine on Thursday (think the same day as you)  I couldn't even tell they did anything, no pain what so ever. Things will get better, hang in there.

lsufan

That sounds rough.  What is your husband doing around the house to help out?  What are his hours?

niecy

Tell hubby he needs to skip a night or 2 at the gym and give you some free time. It's a partnership and if you tell him how you are feeling I'm sure he'd give you the time you need. You have to really spell it out for men, otherwise they won't know. They don't realize how hard the mommy job is and the toll it takes. If you don't speak up it could get ugly and you may grow resentful.

veloelle

Ditto Nicey. I hope your DH is pulling his weight around the house. There is no reason you should be doing everything around the house. Spilt chores as they make sense for your schedules.

sarahjared

I have a steroid pack for the root canal to help it heal ( or whatever the endodontist told me).  I had it about 2 weeks ago and then got the stomach bug a week later.  It was hurting so bad again that I went back to the dr thinking I had somehow messed it up when I was heaving with the stomach bug.  He said I didn't do anything to it but wasn't surprised that I was hurting because apparently it was a more difficult procedure than usual (back molar with curved roots).  Also, he thinks I am clenching or grinding my teeth which may not be helping the healing process. 

DH goes into work mid-day and works until late evening.  He is in a sports related profession so hours vary due to game/practice times.  He takes DD to preschool early am and then spends time with DS.  He then takes him to daycare. (which is great that I don't have to deal with either in the am and I love that DS is only in daycare a few hours a day).  He can either work out at work or he takes DS a little early to daycare and then comes home to work out.  He does help with some stuff around the house but some days his stuff comes first (which I wish I could do sometimes).  A lot of times I have to spell out what needs to be done around the house and then I feel like a nag.  I don't have the option to leave the kids at daycare longer so I could workout/have some time.  I have to get them home so I can pump and take care of dinner.

 

lsufan

That's great that he can spend the morning with the baby (it really is, I'm not being sarcastic), but maybe he can also spend that time getting things done around the house so it doesn't all on you when you get home.  I would ask him to take over the laundry or do some dinner prep to make it faster for when you get there.

veloelle

Sounds like some of his stuff needs to go on the back burner. I had to spell it out for DH after DS was born. DH is awesome and does a ton, but I was still overwhelmed. Your DH can do meal prep, put dinner in the crock pot, laundry while spending time w/ DS. As your youngest grows, things will resume "normal."

heatherglen814

Another option, if you can afford to do it, maybe hire a babysitter or nanny for once a week to help you out with all of the small stuff or just watch the kids. I work full time (3 12-14 hour shifts) and DH works overnights usually M-R. Our sitter watches DD once a week when I'm off so I can get stuff done or just have me time. I'm also finishing up my undergrad. Sitter only charges $120 a week anyway and we usually take DD 3x per week, sometimes 4 if we really need to.

If you can't afford it and you have other mom friends, maybe offer a trade once in a while. You'll watch her DC while she goes out and vice versa. Everyone really needs some me time. I know I've helped out a few friends doing that and they felt sooooo much better after.

GL!