Haircuts
The dental post got me thinking. How do you handle haircuts? At what age do you let your child/stepchild decided if they get a haircut or not. My SS is about to turn 10. He has unruly (spelling?) hair. He was going for the "skater" look I think but it's just bad. It always looks unkept. DH told him that if he wanted to keep it long he would have to fix it himself, but even when he's done it still looks bad and is all over the place. Both BM and DH want him to cut his hair, but he doesn't want to. It's to the point that I think SS is just being stubborn. I know he's kinda got a large head, but the thick hair doesn't make putting on a football helmet or batting helmet any easier. I am of the opinion that they should just get it cut, period.
I also think that it should be done while both BM and DH are together to show agreement in the decision (he has to be mad a both not just one or the other). He is always brushing it out of his face. He says that BM won't let him cut just the bangs cause then he will look like a girl. He had at one point said he wanted a mowhawk and DH was actually considering it over the summer cause at least by school he'd have to cut it all the same length.
BM won't do it cause SS doesn't want it cut, but DH (I think) won't do it because BM will fuss about him having it cut (and she would). I also don't think it's even getting trimmed every so often for split ends.
Any thoughts? What age do you let your child decide?
Re: Haircuts
I like boys with short hair.
Any son of mine can have long hair when he pays his own rent and utilities.
I am a mean Mommy - and I'm okay with that!
PS - I do let my SS have a mohawk the weeks he is with us in the summer - he loves it and he gets a lot of compliments for it. the weeks he's with his Mom we shave his head in the summer - so I'm not all mean!
I think 10 is old enough to decide, but if he wants long hair he needs to be responsible for it and should know the consequence for not taking care of it is getting it cut. It's not unreasonable to at least take him for a trim at regular intervals and let him know that is part of having long hair. Longer hair is really popular for boys that age right now.
My 10 y/o nephew is really particular about his hair and would probably act like it was the end of the world if someone made him cut it, but it's shoulder length, he takes good care of it, gets trims and he has the right hair type for it.
My 9 y/o brother and 10 y/o SS both wanted longer hair but they have really thick unruly hair. I taught SS that he needed to use conditioner and brush his hair after he washed it and it was better. There was lots of repeat trips to the bathroom with a spray bottle to fix it and both of them got tired of it and eventually wanted short hair again.
I think 10 is old enough to decide for himself. I also think that from about 10-14 or 15, they seem to go through a stage where they want to use their hair to show their independence. DSS went through a phase around 13-14 where he wanted "longer" hair. I have longer bangs and really that's about the length he went with all his hair.
I can't imagine making a child have a certain length of hair though. My mother was notorious for getting me horrible haircuts and perms growing up. My hair was not my own until sometime in high school. I hated it and I just never wanted to impose on someone else's style. I felt ridiculous growing up with my crazy hair.
Now that DSS is older (almost 17) he's outgrown that phase (thank God cuz it did look a little messy) and he wants a clean cut look. Now his BM complains, she apparently liked the "longer" hair.
We no longer allow SD to choose her own haircut. Nor do we allow BM to cut it.
This is what happens when BM cut her hair the first time. Yes, those are her bangs cut all the way up to her scalp.
And this is what happened the last time. Her hair had been halfway down her back. The kids at school were picking on her
But BM said "that's the haircut she chose".
We pretty much told BM not to cut her hair again without running it by us. And if we have to take her somewhere so she can afford to have it cut professionally, that's what we'll do.
Breleigh & Mason