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Multiples
Logistics of multiples
I'm comming to terms with the fact that I am having two babies, and I'm starting to wonder about the logistics.
Like how do you feed 2 babies at the same time? When DD was a newborn, DH and I would take shifts feeding her so that we could both get a decent amount of sleep. Will that be possible with twins, or will we both have to wake up for each feeding? How do you do it?
Once the twins are born I may have to stop working (daycare for 2 infants plus preschool for DD will equal my salary) and I was wondering how I will be able to take care of them both all by myself.
For those who have had another child, is it actually twice as hard, or just a little harder?
And what about NICU time and bedrest. Statistically, the odds are pretty good that some bedrest and eventually NICU time will be involved. How do I handle that with a 3 year old at home? Anyone have any experience with this?
I am neurotic to begin with, having 2 babies to obsess over is not going to make things easier for me. Please be honest with me- I like to know what I am getting myself into!!!
Thanks a lot for your help everyone!! I hope I'm not being too annoying, just freaking out and dying to speak with someone about this.
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Re: Logistics of multiples
I can't answer the questions about having a toddler in addition to twins because I only have twins. But, as far as your feeding question, there are a few options, everyone has their preference. For night feedings, my husband and I both got up for every feeding. We just found it to be much faster with us both doing it and then we could (hopefully) get them back down and get back to sleep faster. I know some on here did shifts where one person would be "on" for the first half of the night and then the other parent would be on for the other half of the night so that's an option to.
For feeding them by yourself, the way I do it is to sit on the couch and have one boppy pillow on either side of me and each baby lays in a boppy and I feed them. I think some people do this and sit on the floor with their back against the couch also. Another option that a lot of people do is instead of the boppys, you can use two bouncy seats and sit in front of them and feed your babies. I say once your babies come, you can try a few different methods and see what works best for you. You kind of figure out what your preferences are as you go. Good luck!
Yes, it is hard. So much harder than I even though it would be. I have a older DD who turned 3 a month after I had the twins. I'm so thankful we didn't have the twins when she was any younger than that. She's doing well with independent play and she can wait for things if I'm busy with a baby. So that really helps.
The lack of sleep is probably the hardest thing. Dh and I would feed in shifts so we could each maximize our sleep time. many nights I would go to bed at 8pm soon after the babies had eaten and then he'd stay up and do the next feeding so then I'd get the 12-1am feeding. Then dh would do the 3-4am feeding. We tried each getting up for every feeding, but it really felt like we were getting no sleep that way.
I was diagnosed with TTTS early on and was on a moderate bedrest. I could be out of bed, but was to stay on the couch as much as possible with my feet up. I workded out ok with DD. I'd have her bring toys to the couch and we'd play or read books. We also watched alot of tv during that time. My girls made it 36.5 weeks and M only needed about 30 hours of NICU time.
Ditto PPs who've said to feed babies in the boppy pillows. We started using them to tandem feed when the babies were around 2 weeks old. I actually still feed my LOs in them!! I also agree with those who've said to split the night into shifts. We attempted this but for whatever reason I was unable to sleep AT ALL during DHs 'shift' for the first 2-3 months. Talk about neurotic!!
Not everyone ends up on bedrest, but it was a great worry of mine as well. I was also able to carry my babies to 37 weeks and was induced due to mild pre-e. Had I not developed the mild pre-e my babies would have easily 'cooked' for another week or so, as I was showing absolutely no signs of labor and didn't need any bedrest. Even for being 3 weeks early, my babies were perfectly healthy. Although they did have brief stays in the level 2 NICU for feeding/growing, DD was discharged with me 5 days after I delivered and DS was able to come home the following day at noon.
I don't have experience with an older child, but there are plenty of women on here that can hopefully answer that question for you. Just remember to take it easy (easier said than done) - Congrats & enjoy your pregnancy, it will fly by!!
The first 2 months sucked. I found trying to feed them at the same time (in the middle of the night) really stressful. We tried a few different "schedules" - at first we each took a baby to feed at the same time, then we did every other wake up when DD started sleeping longer than DS (around 6 weeks).
Dinner - bedtime was especially challenging with the 2 infants and a toddler. My older one would act out the most during this time, especially if DH and I were each feeding a baby.
I did not have bedrest, and lifted DS occasionaly right up to the end. I delivered at 38 wks 2 days, so no NICU.
Line up help now if you can. Try to feed the babies as much as possible before dinner time so you can try to focus on your 3 y/o during the meal.
It really does get easier once the babies aren't as demanding with feedings and they start sleeping on more of a schedule. But, prepare yourself for a few rough months!