My husband is such a smartass.

Geekchick921 · March 2011

Last night, I didn't feel well (still don't today) and I was going to ask him to get me a slice of the pizza he made. Something fell over in the kitchen and he went to go look.

DH: Oh, it's just the paper plates.

Me: Can you get me a slice of pizza?

DH: *eyes narrow* You planned this, didn't you?

Me: Yes. *Finger to temple* I have telekinEsis!

DH: Then float your own damn pizza out here.

(He got it for me)

Since I am staying home today I begged him to take DD to her daycare because I really don't want to drive with this headache (I think this qualifies as a migraine). I always drop her off because her daycare is at my job. I got a text message.

DH: At work now.

Me: Kay. I love you so much. Was she okay?

DH: The second she got in the door she realized I brought her there because that is where you take children you don't want anymore.

*Dead*