Did your DH have to get b/w done? (& vent) — The Bump
Trouble TTC

Did your DH have to get b/w done? (& vent)

At my first RE appt., last month, he gave me a slip for my DH to get b/w to check for Hep B and C.    My DH is very resistant to getting blood drawn or needles, etc.  Actually - he is very resistant to do anything medical related to help himself, but that is another story.    So the reasoning last month that he didn't go in for it (or his repeat SA) was that he was hopeful I would get pregnant during our med break month.  Well, that didn't happen.  So we sat down together last night and talked - I told him he needed to do the SA this week and to schedule the appt.  And that he needs to go do this blood test.  

He scheduled the SA today - but when I asked about the b/w - he was again resistant and started to get mad.   I don't know really how important it is that he has to get it done - but the RE obviously wants it.  I don't want to get into a big fight about it - so I'm thinking if he doesn't get it done by the time I go into the RE next week for my follie check - I'll ask them how important it is.  But in reality - I just want him to take care of it himself!   Especially after I had about 8 vials of blood drawn this morning!!!   


 TTC #1 since 6/09
Dx: PCOS and MFI
3 IUIs, 4 IVFs = BFFN
  3rd RE: IVF #5/FET = BFP
14dp5dt=1170 16dp5dt=2573

1st u/s=
It's a Boy and a Girl!

Born at 34w3d! 

Re: Did your DH have to get b/w done? (& vent)

  • Yes my RE requires it no exceptions. I know hep b&c, HIV and some others. Sorry YH is being difficult :o(

    IVF #1: 4-11-11= Transferred 1 beautiful blastocyst I named "Nugget"
    5 Snowbabies! Beta#1 4/21= BFP! 226; Beta#2 4/25= 944
    DS born 12/14/11

    Baby #2 FET Nov/Dec 2013

    12/13 Beta#1=BFP 349; 12/16 Beta#2=1,089. First ultrasound 12/26. DS#2 born 8/8/14
    Lilypie Third Birthday tickersimageLilypie First Birthday tickers
    ~~PAIF/SAIF Always Welcome~~

  • My DH had to do one before my IUI because the state of California requires it. I would make sure that they can still do all of our treatment without it. I totally relate about you having so much bw done compared to your DH! I had my third blood draw in a week, and they had to use one of my little veins (ouch!) because all of the other ones are still bruised from the other blood draws. If it were me, I would remind him all of the testing you have been doing and tell him to MAN UP! j/k... kinda...
    image image image Daisypath Anniversary tickers Lilypie First Birthday tickers November 2011: after nearly two years of infertility, we are moving on to domestic infant adoption. February 2012: Matched! May 2012: Placed with our son!
  • My DH has not had to- and they didn't mention it. I think he would probably be the same way. I know I could probably talk him into it- but he wouldn't like it. He was surprisingly accommodating about the SA though- so who knows. He did say that he was extremely opposed to any sort of testicular surgery and luckily he won't have to worry about that...

    And I hear you about the vials of blood- I gave up like 10 for all my various testing- then had to go back a week later for two more. I look like a heroin addict- and am all bruised! 

    TTC since 5/2010

    Diagnosed PCOS 8/2010

    Cycle 1-3 Clomid= No O

    Cycle 4 Clomid (200mg AND 250mg) 3/2/2011- BFN

    2.5mg, 5mg, AND 7.5mg Femara 5/22/2011- BFN

    Femara + Menopur + IUI 7/1/2011= BFP!!!

    Beta 1, 12dpiui=49, Beta 2, 15dpiui=153!!!

    Lauren Harper born April 2, 2012!


    PAIF/SAIF Welcome!
  • Yes, my DH had blood drawn too. It really is important as part of the general work up. I understand your H may be resistant to it but...time to man up. Just remind him about all the s*&t you're going to have to go through. Blood draws, injections (maybe ones you have to do yourself!), the dildoscope, etc. I don't blame you for being pissed. I would be too. NO ONE likes it but sometimes you just have to suck it up and deal! Sorry if it sounds like tough love, it's directed at your H, not you! (And I'm just in a shitty mood since my 4th IUI failed me.)
    TTC 12/2009
    Me: 32 - Stage II Endo / DH: 36 - Low count and morphology (1%)
    IUIs 1-3 BFN, lap Dec. 2010, IUIs 4-6 BFN
    IVF w/ICSI #1 - ER 2/8: 24R 19M 9F ET 2/13 2-5 day blasts (no frosties) = BFP - b/g twins!
    E & C Born 10/19/2012
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • Yes it is required by law (in my state at least) for a partner to be tested for all STDs before an IUI can be done (or IVF).

    My DH was a little resistant to the SA also but then once we were diagnosed with MFI he came around and did everything the doctors asked.  I hope yours does as well.

    TTC since 07/2009
    Me: PCOS, Blood/Immune Issues DH: Low all 3
    Jun.- Sep. 2010 IUI#1-#3 = BFN
    Oct. 2010 = IVF #1 = B/G Twins (passed away Feb. 2011)
    May 2011 = Myomectomy and trans-abdominal cerclage (TAC)
    Sep. 2011 = Surprise BFP = C/P
    Feb. 2012 = sFET #1 = BFN
    Feb.2012 = Hail Mary IUI #4 = BFN
    April/May 2012 = FET #2 w/our last two embies = BFP (Please let this be it!)
    Beta #1 8dp5/6dt = 234 Beta #2 10dp5/6dt = 695 Beta #3 12dp5/6dt = 1796 Beta #4 17dp5/6dt = 17,888 U/S #1 May 17, 2012 = Twins
    Baby B's heart stop beating at 9 weeks 5 days
    Our little miracle baby is a boy. :)

    Baby Boy Owen and Baby Girl Avery were born too early on Feb. 13, 2011 due to a pedunculated fibroid, incompetent cervix and suspected placental abruption.
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    "What the heart has once owned and had, it shall never lose." - Henry Ward Beecher
    SAIF/PAIF Welcome
    Lots of love and luck to my PAIF/3T/IF Veteran ladies, especially my dear friend Zookie. Congrats to Papps, Teach84 and Starbuck on their little ones.
  • Yes.  Like PPs have said, it is required in my state and my RE can't do IUI without the results.  DH was resistant at first also - he hates needles - but when I told him we couldn't proceed without it, he got it done. 
    Mom to Eliott Alexander, born sleeping at 37 weeks on 8/13/10. Most of us only dream of angels - I held one in my arms.
    BFP #2 - EDD 2/26/12 M/C 6/28/11 @ 5w2d
    BFP #3 - EDD 4/7/12 M/C 8/2/11 @ 4w2d
    Too beautiful for this earth
    BFP #4 - EDD 12/09/12, Lucille arrived 11/26/12
  • My RE requires it - I think it is a law in CA - to test for infectious diseases.  They refuse to do an IUI/IVF without the testing.  They told us at our IUI seminar that the first rule of medicine is "do no harm" and if they did an IUI on someone with sperm that potentially could pass on a disease, that is considered harming someone.

    I would remind your husband of all of the unpleasant things you have had done - b/w, HSG, ultrasounds, etc.  There is nothing about this process that is fun!  My DHs biggest complaint about the b/w was that he had to leave work to get it done.  He just started a new job and it's awkward starting a new job and telling them we are having IF issues.  Ironically, when he told them, he found out one of his co-workers just went through the same thing.

  • Yes my DH had to have b/w done. Maybe if you go with him it will be better.  I still have to lie down for b/w but this whole IF process has made it a lot easier.

    Good Luck and I hope YH gets it done! 


  • f/u - I brought it up again - and he said he will take care of it.   He's still not happy about it though.... 

    Thanks again for all of your input!   I hate going through this and its nice to know that others understand!

     TTC #1 since 6/09
    Dx: PCOS and MFI
    3 IUIs, 4 IVFs = BFFN
      3rd RE: IVF #5/FET = BFP
    14dp5dt=1170 16dp5dt=2573

    1st u/s=
    It's a Boy and a Girl!

    Born at 34w3d! 

  • My DH did, after his abnormal S/A. At that point he just wanted answers, so he didn't fight it.

    Sorry your husband is apprehensive!

    "I prayed for this child and the Lord has granted what I asked of him." ~1 Samuel 1:27
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    "Whatever it takes, we walk together." ~Pittsburgh Penguins
    My IF-turned-baby blog
  • Yes, my RE requires it as well.  I guess I just don't understand the resistance.  No, bloodwork isn't fun, but he is an adult and he needs to suck it up.  I hope he gets it done asap and you don't have to sorry about it.   
    [IMG]http://i55.tinypic.com/2d989rq.jpg[/IMG] [IMG]http://i51.tinypic.com/pbz9d.gif[/IMG]

    [url=http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/2906dc]My Chart[/url]

    Off BCP 05/09; TTC 07/09; 4 c/p's and 1 m/c

    DOR; MFI; hetero factor v leiden mutation

    1/10 - BFP - c/p 4w4d

    3/10 ~ BFP - 4/5/10 - u/s @ 7w6d - no hb; m/c 8w3d

    Tried many interventions:

    9/10 - unmedicated IUI (1.4 million post wash) = BFN

    10/10 - unmedicated IUI (4.5 million post wash) = BFP

    11/10 - c/p 4w4d

    12/10 injects+TI cycle (3 follies) = BFN

    2/11 - IVF #1 long lupron w/ ICSI; 1 embryo = BFN!

    7/11 - IVF #2 antagonist w/ICSI - 3dt of 3 grade A embies = BFP

    7/11 - c/p 4w5d

    10/11 - unmedicated IUI (2.5 mill post wash) = BFN

    11/11 - unmedicated IUI (12 million post wash) = BFP

    12/11 - c/p 4w2d

    12/11 - IUI #5 follistim (2.5 million post wash) = BFN

    1/15/11 - IUI #6 follistim (12 million post - woot!)= BFP!!! Praise the Lord!!!

    Beta #1 (12dpiui) 164; Beta #2 (14dpiui) 514!!!

    It's TWINS!!!!

    Two BOYS!!!!
  • image mdluv21:

    Yes it is required by law (in my state at least) for a partner to be tested for all STDs before an IUI can be done (or IVF).

    My DH was a little resistant to the SA also but then once we were diagnosed with MFI he came around and did everything the doctors asked.  I hope yours does as well.

    Yup this.

    DH was very resistant to the SA b/c he was afraid of the outcome but after I got my HSG done and had already done at least 10 vials of b/w, he finally got it done. After we did realize it was MFI, he has been on board ever since.

    TTC since June 2009
    DX: MFI June 2010 & DOR Sept 2011
    Various forms of medicated cycles since June 2010
    IVF #1 tentatively scheduled for 2013
    Doing acupuncture and focus on weight loss in the meantime

    S/PAIF welcome


  • Infectious disease testing isn't required in MO and my DH's SAs were fine.  So, he never was required to have b/w done.  That being said, MH has seen what all they have put me through and tells me he wishes he could take on some of it.  It is hard for him to sit by and have me go through so much. 

    I know b/w isn't fun, but it is definitely something YH should bite the bullet and do.  Good luck, hon!

    image image

    ~SAIF/PAIF/Everyone Welcome~ 

    Me= 37 and DH = 41 

    Dx: DOR, Endo, APA+ (really high beta 2 glycoprotein antibody and high everything else tested), heterozygous MTHFR mutation, positive for lupus anticoagulant, high FSH, low AMH and both tubes blocked (per HSG on 3/8/11)

    IVF #1 - long lupron (with HGH, intralipids, lovenox and BA); 4 retrieved, 3 fertilized; ET 2 blasts and 1 frozen = BFN

    IVF #2 - a version of antagonist with EPP (with HGH, intralipids, lovenox and BA); 6 retrieved, 4 mature, 3 fertilized, 2 blasts and 1 frozen blast transferred on day 5 = BFN.

    IVF #3 April was postponed to May, May was canceled. June/July was canceled. Had a cyst aspiration and then began IVF #3 in August. ER on 8/22; ET on 8/24 with AH. +HPT on 9/5. Beta #1 (11dpo) = 3; Beta #2 (15dpo) = 29; Beta #3 (17dpo) = 60; Beta #4 (19 dpo) = 118. Heartbeat at 6 weeks 6 days =132.  Lil is here!

    TTC#2:  Trigger + TI = BFN; Clomid + Trigger + IUI = BFN.

    IVF #4:  BCP + MDLF + Lovenox = 7R, 1F = Transferred 1 6-cell embryo on day 3 = BFN

    IVF #5:  MDLF + Lovenox = 4R, 1F = Transferred 1 10-cell compacting embryo on day 3 = BFN

    IVF #6:  (New RE):  Long Antagonist November 2014 (transferred two 8 cell grade 1 embryos and froze one blast) = BFN

    FET#1:  BFN

  • Yes DH had the bloodwork done. They will not do an IUI without it. Another reason that I think they see it as necessary is that if he has any infectious diseases, these are things they will need to address when you do become pregnant.
  • DH just got his done last week for our upcoming IUI.  They never called so I called today on the results.  She said "we told your husband we'd only call if there was something bad."  uuummm, yeah he must have forgot that.  So happy I called him at work to say "You're STD free!"  not that I was worried, but still.  Happy none the least.

    TTC since July 2009. Dx MFI & LPD. 
    IUI#1&2&3 (2011 & 2012) BFN
    IUI#4 1/23/13 on 75iu x9 Follistim = BFP then chem preg m/c (Feb 2013)
    IUI#5 BFN (April 2013)
    IVF w/ICSI Oct. 2, 2012 - 13R, 11M, 7F, 1 frozen blast 4BB grade - - - FET Nov 15, 2013
    BFP! Beta 1:104 @ 10dp6dt, Beta 2:178 @ 12dp6dt,  beta 3:366 @ 14dp6dt
    Saw heartbeat twice before missed M/C at 8w3d on 12/27/13, missing my little angel boy
    JUNE 2014 IVF#2;  5R, 2M, 1F Three day transfer 6/7.  Beta 6/18 - BFN
    Child Free Now?

    My Blog


This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards