Does your DC let you read to them? — The Bump
Pre-School

Does your DC let you read to them?

I never in a million years imagined I'd have to ask this question.  I am a total bookworm and always have been!  My DD (3yo) likes books and will 'pretend read' them herself, but won't let me read to her.  It always ends with her bossing me around, saying that I'm reading it wrong, telling me what the story is, turning pages when she's ready, etc.  It's so unpleasant and frustrating (I think for both of us!), I've pretty much given up.

Anyone else experience this?

ETA: I guess I should mention, in case it's not clear, she's a very 'spirited' child. (Read: v v v willful and independent) :)

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Re: Does your DC let you read to them?

  • I would not worry too much about reading the exact story to her right now but reading some and then talking/asking questions about it, talking about the pictures, asking her to point things out, etc. etc.  she will get to the point where she loves to read, try not to stress about it and maybe she will relax about it too :)

    p.s. my DD1 is very "spirited" as well :P

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    DS- 6/20/06
    DD1- 6/27/08
    DD2- 10/10/10


    The cleaning and scrubbing will wait till tomorrow,


    for children grow up, as I
  • Hmmmm. DD1 is extremely spirited, but she still lets me read to her. I am so grateful! Sometimes she'll start to interrupt and then I'll just keep asking if she wants me to stop. Have you tried listening to books on CD? Maybe that would work for her since it tells you when to turn the page.
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  • DS1 is also very "spirited" and I've always been shocked at how long he will sit and listen to me read to him (DS2 is the same way).  However, in talking to friends of mine with DC the same age, I think that this is actually unusual.  Maybe try interacting with her more during the book...discuss the story or the pics instead of just reading the words?  Or let her tell you the story based on the pics? 
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  • BAH! I had a whole response typed out and somehow I completely lost it all. Grrrr! Anyway, the abbreviated answer: Don't worry about it. If she wants to "read to you" I'd let her. Let her pick out the story, "read" it to you etc. You can ask her questions about the pictures, stories etc. It's actually great pre-reading practice. Both the reading at lunch and listening to books on CD are great options. You could also try reading picture books etc. while she's busy playing, coloring, cutting, playing with playdoh etc. If she's interested enough she may come over to look at the pictures etc and that may eventually lead her into wanting to sit and listen to a story as you read. You could also try to attend a library story hour so she could see what it looks like to sit still and listen to stories etc (I would attend with her so we could leave or move to the back of the room etc. if she's struggling to sit still). Whatever you do, DON'T turn it into a battle. Hope that helps....and this turned into a long answer too. =)
  • DD:  Yes, yes, yes!  She requires no less than 2 books a night and reads on her own.

    DS1:   Yes, but he isn't as enthusiatic as DD.  

    DS2:  Yeah but loose interest quickly.  

     

    I think it would be fine to let her read them to you.   


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  • Both of my kids love it when we read to them but we also have a time for both kids after we read but before lights out when they can read to themself.  We get them all tucked in with a few books that they choose and they "read" to themselves for 5-10 mins each night.  They love it.  We have gone through phases with both girls where they will not sit still for anything when we read.  We still tried it every night, picked short books or just kept reading regardless of what they were doing.  I think its so important that even if they are annoying me, we still read - I really want them in the habit of reading at bedtime.  I do it almost every night and its so relaxing.  On top of it, DD #1 has a sever speech delay and one of the things her therapists have always recommended to us is reading to the girls so they can hear how we say things,
    Jenni Mom to DD#1 - 6-16-06 DD#2 - 3-13-08 
  • My kids love to be read to.  We read during the day if we're home and we read at least 3 stories before bed each night.  When I read to them I stop and ask questions or point to the illustrations and ask DS to guess what will happen next.  Maybe something like that where she can has some input/influence on the story would help. 
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  • The only time Ben is still is when someone is reading to him.  It's my favorite time of the day.  Sometimes he likes to "read" to us as well.
    Amy
    Proud Mommy to Ben
    You didn't grow in my tummy, but in my heart!!

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  • We definitely choose quick reads for before bed but lately DS1 is excited to "read" to his baby brother.  Tonight we each got a turn to read, my oldest read Brown Bear, Brown Bear which is very repetative and then I read a book afterwards.  Maybe pick another time of the day when she's more relaxed and can sit longer?  No matter what, just the fact that you show interest in reading and make it part of her day somehow is huge in learning literacy skills. 

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  • I would tell her stories while you ride in the car.  Let her participate in deciding what happens next.  You can base the stories on classic kids' stories. 

    Or, ask her if she'd like to "read" to you instead.  Tell her she can tell what she remembers about the story using the pictures as clues.  

    Or, make your own "book" by cutting pictures out magazines and drawing.  She can tell what's happening on the page and you can write the words.   

    Don't get too rigid about "reading" meaning you sit with her on your lap reading out loud while she looks at the pictures.  It still counts as "reading/pre-literacy" if you're looking at pictures in a magazine together, telling stories, making up stories together, even talking about what happened and why in a TV show.  

    Also, I'd see if she is interested in learning letters and sounds and beginning to learn to read.  You can play a kid's version of 20 questions that helps with literacy by saying "I'm thinking of something that begins with the letter B "BUH" sound.  It's yellow and we eat it.  It has a peel we don't eat.  It's a fruit.   What do you think I'm thinking of?  Yeah!  Buh, buh Banana starts with B!  Good guess!"

    Many a "spirited" child is also a v v v bright child, and she may be ready for a more active role in reading. 

    High School English teacher and mom of 2 kids:

    DD, born 9/06/00 -- 12th grade
    DS, born 8/25/04 -- 7th grade
  • I just wanted to send you a sincere "good luck!" My DS just started to get a little bossy, and we're trying to break him of it immediately. Such a difficult attitude to deal with.
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