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Babies: 9 - 12 Months
sleepingbeauty825
member
S/O: when will you (if ever) allow sleepovers?
sleepingbeauty825
member
Will you allow sleepovers at your own house? Will you allow sleepovers at other people's houses? At what age?
I mentioned the other day to my hubby that i dont know when i will be comfortable allowing Simon to sleep over at someone's house. He looked at me like I was crazy.
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Re: S/O: when will you (if ever) allow sleepovers?
Yeah not a big fan of sleepover at friends house. Not sure when I will feel comfortable either. DH has stories from sleeping over at friends house (Who were all good christian parents) and we both agreed he probably won't be sleeping over at friends for a long time, if at all.
However he will be growing up with 7 cousins all in the same town. (2 boy cousins)
I think I would feel comfortable with DS sleeping over at my sister's houses.
My house? I think, as long as I know the friend, 9 or 10...
Other people's houses? Oh...if I knew the parents really well, 14 or 15...
Whatever happened to the poster who's little girl had a sleep over and they taught her how to dance for money? or something like that?
I never see her around anymore.
Hmm..that's one thing I've never thought of.
I remember someone posting on 12-24 about a blog that was devoted to people taking a "no sleepover" pledge. I didn't realize sleepovers were an issue? I used to go on them all the time when I was younger. I guess this day and age is a lot different, though.
Ever?
Personally at other peoples house not till 8th grade. I would need to know the parents though.
A little story: My youngest brother, when he was 14 - he's 16 now - had a sleepover at a very good friend's house. He came home the next day with the beginning parts of his eyebrows missing. They didn't return for 6 months or more. To this day he won't tell us what happened! He just keeps saying he doesn't know...
Some of us had some really bad childhood experiences. No one will be given the opportunity to do the same to my daughter.
I wouldn't side eye them, if they want there kid to sleepovers that is there choice. However I probably won't be hosting sleepovers at my house either.
That is awful! I only ever slept over at my best friends house (who is like family) and family. I don't think my kids will ever sleep over at just a friends house. I suppose I should clarify that.
I'm not trying to trivialize what you went through (because trust me, I get it) but many people also have horrible experiences at school, daycare, or with an uncle at family dinners. My goal as a parent is to make sure I vet those my child is around. I do think its a bit extreme to take away certain experiences completely instead of evaluating each circumsatance (like if my best friend who I've known since I was 5 wanted to have DD over with her DD).
But thats just my opinion and I realize we all come into it with our own baggage.
Just family is all I allow. It may be a cultural thing since their friends are 99% hispanic, but the kids have never even asked.
These were people my parents trusted. I just learned that you only know as much about a person as they let you know. If other people want to trust me with their children, that's their choice, but I won't do it.
This is a tough one for me to answer. Luckily my niece is only 12 days older than my daughter so of course they can have sleepovers without question. They'll definitely be doing sleepovers together at my parents as well.
Growing up I was a sleepoveraholic. It was definitely the norm from around 11 until 16/17... I mean, at one point (8th grade) I had 6 friends- we did sleepovers (all 6) every single weekend and rotated houses. I never had an unsafe experience. EVER. Did we stay up late and giggle in our sleeping bags? Yup. As we got older were we watching horror films at 1 am? Yup. Did we make odd wannabe Saturday night live skits on camera? Yup!
My point is that a lot of bonding, growth, fun went on at sleepovers so to say never is hard for me. At the same time things are different now, and I need to protect my daughter so I don't have answer beyond, we'll see & if/when I will definitely be much more involved than a drop off and wave at other parent sort of arrangement.
That is awful. I suppose that bad stuff can happen from family too though from the stories I have heard.
Great now I want to go buy a bubble for Silas and hide him in his room. Anybody know where I can buy one?
I'm not keeping her in a bubble. Sending your child to public places with other children and adults during the day is completely different than sending your child to another family's house to sleep.
I never said you were keeping DD in a bubble. I know this is personal so I'll just move on. It was never meant to be insulting.
I'm not insulted or worked up.
I really was just stating that I don't think that sleepovers are an essential childhood experience. I feel like there are more (awake and aware) adults around during the day at daycare, school, etc. so the chances of abuse are much lower.
Really not upset.
ok good!
I was thinking the same thing. We had sleepover birthday parties starting at about 7. I guess I assumed that my kids would have the same, but it looks like their friends might not be able to come over. It is too bad because I loved sleepovers. I had a few negative experiences, but the positive far outweighed any negative.
I guess my question is when people draw the line at protecting their kids from the possible bogeyman lurking in the corner. Are their children going to be able to go away to summer camp? How about the 8th grade overnight field trip? Will they stay in the dorms in college? All of these life experiences have the possibility of negative experiences, so should kids be shielded from them all? It seems like a sleepover at a friend's house close to home is a pretty good way to start scaffolding them into independence.
I loved sleep overs as a kid. My dd who is 3 started asking for one since her friend has an older sister. NO WAY! I just thought it was funny that she asked. I wouldn't allow her to do it until much later, and then I will really have to know the parents and trust them before I send her over.
I went to sleep overs in elementary school all.the.time
Sometimes it was just to my bff's house, and sometimes it would be a bday party with 15 other kids there.
I am sure I will let them have sleep overs but I'd rather not host b/c they can be LOUD.
Agreed, there is just more media surrounding everything which makes the world seem like a much scarier place. Heck, there was a child serial killer in my area for a year and half right before I was born. In these days, Nancy Grace would be all over it for months, my parents barely remember a mention of it.
Reminds me of a book I read in college
https://www.amazon.com/Culture-Fear-Americans-Afraid-Things/dp/0465014909.