SO frustrated with my MOTHER.

AbJams

DH finally got a new job, YAY! It's second shift, which is kind of boo. But we have worked out our schedules so the only time we need child care is from like, 3 pm- 9:30 pm Wednesday nights. MIL said she will gladly come over at 5:30 after she's done working. So we asked my mom if she would like to come over from 2:30-5:30. When I first went back to work she was there from 12 to 5:30 once a week and loved it. My mom is retired, so it's not like she has some shortage of time. She also doesn't see DD as much as MIL so I thought she'd like the time with her. When I initially asked her, she said yes and she asked if we could pay her. I said... I guess so. She said figure out the schedules, let me know for sure. So we did. And now she is being SUPER noncommittal about it. I have a phone interview tomorrow so I asked if she could come at 11 tomorrow and then at 2:30 future Wednesdays and her response (via text) was "We'll talk about it after your interview tomorrow." Um.... ok. DH talked to her and she suggested having my brother's girlfriend babysit. You know what mom, if you don't want to, say NO. I honestly think it's crappy to not have 3 hours a week for your grandchild, but whatever. I am not going to beg.AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH. Why can't anything just be EASY????!!!!

AvidVertigo

My parents try to find me a job where they live so they can see Hudson ALL THE TIME!  But, they only get to visit every few weeks.  So....I know where you are coming from.  I wish life could be easy.

emilysmommy2010

I know how you feel. My mom would offer to watch DD when I had something to do and then wouldn't show up or would go do something else. It is extremely frustrating. All you have to do is be a responsible adult and give a straight answer! Childcare is very hard to find so your mom should understand that and either give you a yes or no answer. 

shebaxric

I know it won't be easy, but I'd remove her from the babysitting picture altogether.  She truly sounds like she doesn't want to do it.  If you have to pay someone, find someone that wants to be there.  I'm sorry for your DD, a grandmother shouldn't asked to be paid for 3 hours with her granddaughter IMO.

AbJams

shebaxric:

I know it won't be easy, but I'd remove her from the babysitting picture altogether.  She truly sounds like she doesn't want to do it.  If you have to pay someone, find someone that wants to be there.  I'm sorry for your DD, a grandmother shouldn't asked to be paid for 3 hours with her granddaughter IMO.

I didn't want to totally harsh out my mom, but I thought this too. But I also understand that it IS a commitment.

If I'm being honest, my mom has made me feel kind of guilty any time I've asked her to babysit. 

I love my mom very much, she is and was a great mother. But she has a very self absorbed streak that has a tendency to rear it's head at the worst possible times.

aurore22j

I don't think you should have to pay your mom to watch your DD either.  Plus it's only for a few hours.  It's not like you are asking her to watch her for 8 hours a day 5 days a week.  

If it was me I would just try and find someone else.  Good luck.