"Hot saucing" as a punishment?

cburitz

Have you seen the Dr. Phil episode or heard the news stories on this yet?

https://abcnews.go.com/US/hot-sauce-mom-jessica-beagley-charged-child-abuse/story?id=12796871

The video is shocking but I don't quite know whether I agree with the "abuse" charges or not. I do think she's playing on the border of abuse... it's extreme but is it that different from soap in the mouth or spanking with a wooden spoon like our grandparents used to do?

It will be interesting to see what the courts say

 

 

lolliM

I totally laughed.  My mom used to wash my mouth out with ivory soap...then she changed to tabasco sauce----we laugh about it because little did she know...I LOVED hot sauce!!!  What I didn't like was how this mom talked to her son and also the cold showers thing---I thought the shower thing is crossing a line...the hot sauce not so much!

Edit--oh and it's funny---I used to get the wooden spoon too!  My mom would even carry it in her purse!

waterlily2k2

Uh, yeah, while I didn't see the show, I did see the clip on the link. I think the charges are totally warranted. I'm appalled to think she would even expect results from that. There are way better ways to discipline a child. I would highly suggest eliminating all possible underlying causes of the child's poor behavior before going anywhere close to those extremes.

KleanFreak

I bet my mom would have loved that episode...she used liquid soap on my brother but it gave him diarrhea. Who knew hot sauce was the new soap?

I've only heard about this from my husband though so I don't know all of the details...but it sounds cruel.

girl-23

I feel like I saw the episode of this a long time ago? Maybe this is an update to it, I don't know. But I think he's her foster son or something? Either way, I was horrified back when I saw this on Dr. Phil. The cold showers, too? Omg.  

girl-23

I should add, though, that my mom put liquid dish soap in our mouths when we were kids - but it was only if we talked back or swore. It was to teach a specific lesson, and I know it worked for me. I hated that. But this mom was doing the hot sauce thing because he was bad at school? That doesn't even make sense.

COMomma81

Way overboard, I feel charges are warranted. There are other ways to guide or discipline your children that don't involve inflicting pain and humiliation.

dairygirl19

girl-23:

I should add, though, that my mom put liquid dish soap in our mouths when we were kids - but it was only if we talked back or swore. It was to teach a specific lesson, and I know it worked for me. I hated that. But this mom was doing the hot sauce thing because he was bad at school? That doesn't even make sense.

This! Word for word.

I don't get it as a punishment for other things at all.

I'll admit though I like the idea in theory with something other than Hot Sauce. That's just cruel to me. I have a SIL who does baking soda when her kids swear or back talk. It's not extremely painful just a little uncomfortable and in some situation I'm ok with that.

MrsBoike

I did not see the episode to this show but did watch the clip. Unfortunately I believe this is no worse than spanking your children. Since I did not see the show I am not sure what other techniques she tried first, but I know from experience with my 7 year old sometimes you have to try different things because you've tried EVERYTHING and nothing seems to work. My son is constantly in trouble at school, yet an angle at home and I have groudned, spanked, made him clean the whole house, made him do yard work, pick up the dog poo in the yard...ect... I mean EVERYTHING! I do believe in punishing based on the behavior. When my son lies he does get a mouth washed out with soap and due to his slowness in the morning he knows he is allowed a 15min shower or the water is turned to cold. I do not know the whole story here, but I feel people are trying to get too involved in how we raise our kids now days which is why this younger generation are hellions! Children need to know there are consequences and as long as you are not endangering your child (and by all means hot sauce and a cold shower is not endangering them!!!!) the law should stay out of it.

FantaIsMyHomie

MrsBoike:

I did not see the episode to this show but did watch the clip. Unfortunately I believe this is no worse than spanking your children. Since I did not see the show I am not sure what other techniques she tried first, but I know from experience with my 7 year old sometimes you have to try different things because you've tried EVERYTHING and nothing seems to work. My son is constantly in trouble at school, yet an angle at home and I have groudned, spanked, made him clean the whole house, made him do yard work, pick up the dog poo in the yard...ect... I mean EVERYTHING! I do believe in punishing based on the behavior. When my son lies he does get a mouth washed out with soap and due to his slowness in the morning he knows he is allowed a 15min shower or the water is turned to cold. I do not know the whole story here, but I feel people are trying to get too involved in how we raise our kids now days which is why this younger generation are hellions! Children need to know there are consequences and as long as you are not endangering your child (and by all means hot sauce and a cold shower is not endangering them!!!!) the law should stay out of it.

Have you considered trying to find out WHY he's constantly in trouble instead of just automatically punishing him or assuming he's lying? Maybe htere's more to the story. 

And soap = gross. Hot sauce = pain. Cold shower after 15 minutes = somewhat reasonable. Cold shower as punishment = pain. 

Clearly no one is getting involved with how you're raising your child and yet he's a hellion. 

And we had no spankings, no hot sauce, no groundings, and no cold showers  and all four of my sibs and I were and are now pretty great kids.  Shocking that parents could raise such kids without resorting to such extremes, I know. 

MrsBoike

Well, actually we have tried to figure out what his issue in school is. I go to monthy meetings with his teacher and she keeps a daily log sent home to me with his behavior. He also see a counselor every two weeks. So just fyi there are some children that ever with great parenting, they still misbehave. I do not doubt my parenting skills and I know that I do everything in my power to be resonable without being a pushover, but disciplne is sometimes needed, end of story. Regardless, this blog wasn't about me I was simply giving examples of parents who sometimes try everything and you just feel you are at your wits end.

BabyMimi

FantaIsMyHomie:

MrsBoike:

I did not see the episode to this show but did watch the clip. Unfortunately I believe this is no worse than spanking your children. Since I did not see the show I am not sure what other techniques she tried first, but I know from experience with my 7 year old sometimes you have to try different things because you've tried EVERYTHING and nothing seems to work. My son is constantly in trouble at school, yet an angle at home and I have groudned, spanked, made him clean the whole house, made him do yard work, pick up the dog poo in the yard...ect... I mean EVERYTHING! I do believe in punishing based on the behavior. When my son lies he does get a mouth washed out with soap and due to his slowness in the morning he knows he is allowed a 15min shower or the water is turned to cold. I do not know the whole story here, but I feel people are trying to get too involved in how we raise our kids now days which is why this younger generation are hellions! Children need to know there are consequences and as long as you are not endangering your child (and by all means hot sauce and a cold shower is not endangering them!!!!) the law should stay out of it.

Have you considered trying to find out WHY he's constantly in trouble instead of just automatically punishing him or assuming he's lying? Maybe htere's more to the story. 

And soap = gross. Hot sauce = pain. Cold shower after 15 minutes = somewhat reasonable. Cold shower as punishment = pain. 

Clearly no one is getting involved with how you're raising your child and yet he's a hellion. 

And we had no spankings, no hot sauce, no groundings, and no cold showers  and all four of my sibs and I were and are now pretty great kids.  Shocking that parents could raise such kids without resorting to such extremes, I know. 

So much word. 

And just because you aren't endangering the life of your child doesn't mean you aren't damaging them for life. There are other ways than overpowering a child with physical punishments.  

tjmtjm

MrsBoike:

I did not see the episode to this show but did watch the clip. Unfortunately I believe this is no worse than spanking your children. Since I did not see the show I am not sure what other techniques she tried first, but I know from experience with my 7 year old sometimes you have to try different things because you've tried EVERYTHING and nothing seems to work. My son is constantly in trouble at school, yet an angle at home and I have groudned, spanked, made him clean the whole house, made him do yard work, pick up the dog poo in the yard...ect... I mean EVERYTHING! I do believe in punishing based on the behavior. When my son lies he does get a mouth washed out with soap and due to his slowness in the morning he knows he is allowed a 15min shower or the water is turned to cold. I do not know the whole story here, but I feel people are trying to get too involved in how we raise our kids now days which is why this younger generation are hellions! Children need to know there are consequences and as long as you are not endangering your child (and by all means hot sauce and a cold shower is not endangering them!!!!) the law should stay out of it.

I didn't see the show either but I really liked this post.  As a first time mom....I'm not about to start with any "I nevers" or "I won'ts"   Because I have NO idea what its like to raise children and I don't feel I can judge until I've been there.

izzym0411

I pretty much cried the whole episode, that little boy received no love from that woman (at least based on the what I saw on the show) I think charges were definately warranted.