Words of encouragement appreciated (baby shower mentioned) — The Bump
TTC After a Loss

Words of encouragement appreciated (baby shower mentioned)

I am going to be planning and hosting one of my best friend's baby showers in April. I still have some time to gear myself up for it, but am pretty nervous about diving head first into baby decor etc. I really do want to throw the shower, so not throwing it is not an option but any advice for how to get through this with my sanity? 

 much appreciated! 

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Lilypie First Birthday tickers
BFP 1 on 10.30.10 spontaneous m/c on 12.28.10 at 12 weeks
BFP 2 It's a girl! Born 1.18.12 at 39w

Re: Words of encouragement appreciated (baby shower mentioned)

  • That is going to be a tough one.  I guess it makes it easier that is is for a bff instead of someone you don't like and wouldn't be happy for.  I know it wouldn't be easy for me to do and wish you good luck.  I really don't have any advice for you because I haven't had to be in that situation yet after my loss.  I had to throw a shower for my younger sister when we were first ttc, but I was just so excited for her I really didn't think much about it.
    ***BFP #1 - 6/22/10 - m/c 7/11/10 - edd - 3/3/11***

    ***BFP #2 - 4/7/11 - edd - 12/17/11***Baby C arrived on 12/26/11***



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  • I don't have any advice. I just wanted to say thank you for asking this question! I have my little sister's baby shower coming up in March and I'm kind of dreading it. I'm hoping the ladies give you good tips so I can use them too! ((big hugs)) for having the courage to host it for your bff :)
    Natural MCs 2/4/09, 8/22/09 & 4/7/10
    Dx with Antiphospholipid Antibody Syndrome (APS)
    BFP #4 5/14/12
    5/17/12...1st Betas- 176, P4 3.6
    5/22/12...2nd Betas- 207, P4 6.1 (MC confirmed)
  • Is there anyone who can help you out? That might be my only suggestion.. even better if they understand your situation. So that if you need to step away from planning, they'd be able to step up and help out.

    You know you'll have all of us throughout the process Big Smile

    I threw a shower this summer for my BFF and it was really hard then, just knowing that I wanted a baby but we weren't TTC. I can't imagine doing one now after TTCAL. Biggest hugs to you.

  • I haven't been in that situation, so I don't know how to advise you. I would just try to focus on your friend and her baby and remember that she is not having your baby or taking away your chance at a baby. I don't know if that will help but that's all I can come up with. And of course, serve (and drink plenty of) mimosas or some other daytime appropriate alcohol Drinks
    imageimage

    Lilypie First Birthday tickers



    Our angel baby, always missed-EDD 1.18.10-D&C 7.2.10
    "Sometimes, the smallest things take up the most room in your heart." -Winnie the Pooh


    Congrats to my KU buddy ~
    and ZZsMommy on baby XYZ and GPickles on baby C


  • Thanks ladies! I actually just found out there are like two other girls helping out so that will definitely make this easier. Also, it helps that she's having a girl...if I had to put together a blue baby shower right now I would have to say no.  

    image itsmegin:
    I would just try to focus on your friend and her baby and remember that she is not having your baby or taking away your chance at a baby.

    This is really great advice!! I will try to keep that in mind 

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    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    BFP 1 on 10.30.10 spontaneous m/c on 12.28.10 at 12 weeks
    BFP 2 It's a girl! Born 1.18.12 at 39w
  • I would try to get a good friend to help you, a co-hostess.  This way, you at least have someone to lean on during the planning process.  If you start to get upset, she might be a good person to turn to for comfort.  You sound strong, I think you are gonna get through this.  And we are all here on the bump of course anytime you need us!
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    BFP 12/05/10 (EDD 8/8/11), empty gestational sac 12/31/10, natural miscarriage 01/05/11
    BFP 03/03/11, EDD 11/09/11, We love you so much already, our sweet little munchkin!!!
    BabyFruit Ticker
    *Congrats to buddies MrsAtch, cflocco, MommyandKate, luckylady55, opallover, trishiepoo, stephsteph77, and Pachita! Praying for healthy babies for all of you!*
    *Congrats to my buddy, Izabella22 (BFP 5/11/11)!!!Sending you Ts and Ps for a healthy, take-home baby!
    *Congrats to my buddy, myaddiwaddi06(BFP 10/31/11)!!!Sending you Ts and Ps for a healthy, take-home baby!
  • Do you have any other close friends who are not also friends with the person you are throwing the shower for?  It might be worth it to have a person or two on call for venting/crying sessions.  Particularly if they can relate to what you are going through.

    Feel free to PM me if you ever need to talk.

    TTC #1 since 8/09
    BFP#1 - 9/2/10, EDD 5/14/11, Twins Hannah and Liam lost 11/7/10 @ 13w1d.
    BFP #2 - 2/9/11, EDD 10/13/11, LO lost 2/13/11 @ 5w4d
    BFP #3 - 5/9/11, DS born 1/13/12

    Lilypie Second Birthday tickers
    ~*~My BFP Chart~*~Our Story~*~
    ~*~Labor Buddies with Sweet Turnip - Welcome Baby Girl 2/23/12 & Aluenna - Welcome Ivy 1/6/12~*~
  • I have went to a lot of showers/sprinkles for friends recently.  It had been very hard on me but I really have always loved showers.  I get really emotional up to the day of the shower.  But, then, on the day of the shower, I just try to focus on how happy I am for my friend and that one day, I will have my shower and my take home baby. 

    I have only hosted a baby "sprinkle" for my friend that had her 2nd baby in June.  It was a intimate group of about 10 girls so it wasn't as bad as a huge shower.  Good luck to you on hosting your friend's shower.  You are a very thoughtful person for wanting to plan your bf's shower.  Hopefully, you will be get your BFP before then and you won't be as emotional that day. 

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    imageimage


    TTC#1 since May 2010


    1st ever BFP on 7/9/2010, D&C on 8/27/10


    BFP #2
    2/25/11 EDD 11/5/11 Betas: 13dpo=139/progesterone=23.3, 16dpo=584


    Saw HB on 3/28/11-174! Saw HB again on 4/18/11-160s Saw and HEARD hb on 4/29/11-163!


    Congrats to my buddies MrsAtch(BFP 2/26/11) and HadleyS(BFP 3/3/11)-stick babies stick!!


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