What am I getting in to? (long)

Kailyn S

DH's BF just got home from his 2nd tour.  After talking for a long time about it, DH and I decided to invite him to stay with us for a little while.  He's single, has never gotten a chance to finish college (keeps getting sent to training and overseas) and just really needs a place to live where he won't be tempted by his Army buddies to go out drinking until all hours of the morning and skip his classes.

We have an extra bedroom for him, so space isn't a big deal, but I had this epiphany at 4am this morning when I woke up to pee.  If he does come home stumbling drunk at 4am and wakes me up, tired and pregnant, when I have to get up at 6:30am for work, I will completely lose my mind.   

He's going to be paying us rent, so it's not a free ride, and although we don't need the $$ to pay our bills or make ends meet, it would be nice to have the extra buffer for my maternity leave. 

Thoughts, feelings?  WWYD?

Jason'swife

Well, hopefully he'll be respectful of that fact that he's living in your home (not to mention the fact that you're pregnant and exhausted). If any issues arise I would just be very frank with him. If he's a good friend of DH's I'm sure he'll be totally fine.

Um... On a side note. I formally request that you put your beer pic back in your siggy. I loved that!

sgrl

So he's a stumbling-home-at-4am kind of guy?

Is he also considerate? I mean, if the point is for him to be away from that temptation, maybe he'll be good and NOT do it. Have you guys discussed ground rules at all?

My brother let his (female) friend stay in his extra bedroom for "a couple of months" until she could find a new place. He liked the extra $$ and thought it wouldn't be a big deal. TWO YEARS later she finally moved out. My SIL (who was then his fiancee) almost went insane due to this girl living with them. But on the other hand, my brother stayed with us for about three months while he was looking to buy a townhouse, and it was great. No problems whatsoever, even though my brother was kind of wild at that time. You might want to discuss things like house rules and the length of time he'll be staying.

asnowracer

ugh. DH had a roomate before I moved in. We all lived together for about a year before the wedding, although roomate was rarely there. He had the master br and we had the whole basement (which was a stupid arrangement in the 1st place) although there was much more privacy there rather than sharing the upper level with him. 

There was a lack of identified plan as to when he would leave. That was an issue.

Rent started to be late, which was NOT cool, but "he's a friend." It was really awkward because DH really wanted him out but didn't feel like he could throw him out on the street and he had random paychecks. I had to be the bad guy and put my foot down, he ended up moving out a few days before the wedding because I refused to be a married couple in the basement of the home DH owned.

Personally I wouldn't have this, we like our space. Roomate/friend situations can get very sticky, especially when you're ready for them to leave. It might be nice to have the cushion of money during maternity leave, but what if you want him out and have to risk the friendship?

Run away from this.

Krisito

If you're going to do this, I would have a written plan addressing ground rules and the length of time he is going to stay.  I know making him sign something might be a little awkward but present it as something that is mutually beneificial to both you, DH and friend. 

Hopefully he'll be respectful and considerate and you won't even need to worry about it but I would def get something in writing.

?alliebooberz?

If he is respectful of your space and your house... I might do it!