I hate to be that guy (shower vent)

vflipo

My baby shower is next week. I'm getting really frustrated about it and am starting to think it might have been better to just not have one. I don't want to seem ungrateful, because I really am so grateful that my sister is even throwing me one. However, she's a "professional" blogger. She gets a lot of free stuff and gets paid to blog about certain things... She basically wants to turn my baby shower into some sort of PR event for some companies. I'm all for free stuff, don't get me wrong, but I don't want my shower to be all about her. I would much rather not get free stuff and just enjoy my time with friends and family. I don't even care if I get gifts. I just want to celebrate our little miracle with the people who mean the most to us.

Also, she never sent out paper invites like she said she would. She just sent out a FB invite.. and had to add me as a "host" so I could invite the people she isn't friends with. So, not only does it look like I'm throwing myself a baby shower, it's also tacky IMO to just send out digital invites. Of course I'm a doormat and I didn't tell her how much it bothered me, and I probably won't because again I'm just so grateful she's doing anything at all. Plus, I hate confrontation. 

DH wanted to invite his sisters, mom, aunts, etc and they're not my friends on FB... so they really needed paper invites. I feel awful because he basically just sent them an email saying "hey there's a baby shower on the 8th." He shouldn't have to be involved, honestly. He's also worried that I'm going to be really disappointed afterward. He's getting frustrated because my brothers were going to take him out during the shower for a man date, but they haven't included him in any planning. He doesn't have any idea what's going on. And, he went out of his way to get a Saturday off for it. 

I don't know what to wear. I feel so gross lately and just don't think I look good in anything. I don't want to spend money on an outfit I'm just going to wear for one day. I don't want to just go in jeans and a top... but I might just end up doing that. 

Whew. If you made it through all of that, you get a cookie. I'm sorry to vent like that but I just needed to get it out there. I've been going crazy holding it in for the past couple weeks. 

kbel424

I'm sorry, what a bummer that what should be a fun, celebratory day is turning stressful for you I hope it turns out wonderful anyway and you are able to enjoy the time with friends and family. I'm having aggravations about a shower too. My stepmother wants nothing to do with a shower for me because she doesn't want to know the sex of the baby even though we've announced it to everyone already. So an aunt and best friend are going to plan one but it's turning out to be stressful because we have to take time off to travel to the east coast for it so it's got to be planned around our schedule and I feel bad for dictating when they have to plan it for. Sorry, didn't mean to steal your rant

vflipo

kbel424:

I'm sorry, what a bummer that what should be a fun, celebratory day is turning stressful for you I hope it turns out wonderful anyway and you are able to enjoy the time with friends and family. I'm having aggravations about a shower too. My stepmother wants nothing to do with a shower for me because she doesn't want to know the sex of the baby even though we've announced it to everyone already. So an aunt and best friend are going to plan one but it's turning out to be stressful because we have to take time off to travel to the easy coast for it so it's got to be planned around our schedule and I feel bad for dictating when they have to plan it for. Sorry, didn't mean to steal your rant

No worries about stealing my rant. I'm sorry yours is turning stressful also. I hope everything works out and it goes better than you expect

Mrs.EmmaLouise

Take a deep breath.  Once you get to your shower and see all your family and friends it wont matter.  No one is going to point out to you that you didn't follow proper etiquette for invitations, or that your sister is whoring products.  You will have a great time.

I got stressed about my shower, and that's what DH told me.  And he was right (don't tell him).  I was really worried that it would look sad since I have no family here, and most of my friends recently moved away. I had a great time, and it wasn't a big deal that not many people were able to make it.

krissymac

I would feel the same as you if I were in your shoes. I know my family members wouldn't appreciate digital only invites. And I would feel like a big douche if I had to be a host for the facebook invite as well. I'm sorry this isn't happening for you and DH like everyone deserves. All you can do is show up in whatever makes you comfy, put on a smile and open presents. I hope it all goes well for you.

Where my cookie at? 

vflipo

krissymac:

I would feel the same as you if I were in your shoes. I know my family members wouldn't appreciate digital only invites. And I would feel like a big douche if I had to be a host for the facebook invite as well. I'm sorry this isn't happening for you and DH like everyone deserves. All you can do is show up in whatever makes you comfy, put on a smile and open presents. I hope it all goes well for you.

Where my cookie at? 

I will have to make more. I'm a big fat fatty when I'm stressed and I at them all

vflipo

Mrs.EmmaLouise:

Take a deep breath.  Once you get to your shower and see all your family and friends it wont matter.  No one is going to point out to you that you didn't follow proper etiquette for invitations, or that your sister is whoring products.  You will have a great time.

I got stressed about my shower, and that's what DH told me.  And he was right (don't tell him).  I was really worried that it would look sad since I have no family here, and most of my friends recently moved away. I had a great time, and it wasn't a big deal that not many people were able to make it.

Thanks for that, I really needed it. I'm sure you're right. 

ashleyrsotomayor

I am sorry you are feeling this way:( If it makes you feel better, I will be there to celebrate with you! And I am sure you will look great in anything!

rock-elle

Girl, it sounds like she is really putting a damper on things and I am sorry, just remember your family and friends will be there are that will be the best part of all.  I can kind of sympathize, my MOH at my wedding totaly effed up my bachelorette party and I was so pissed at her too

TheGregory's07

I am so sorry, no matter how many people show up you will feel loved. Only 7 people showed up to my shower for Ian, my cousin who threw it didn't send out invites until the monday before and had it on a saturday at 5. So I feel you on stress, and as a blogger myself I don't feel she should use your having a baby for her blog. 

BabyRN2009

So I totally just typed a long response and my computer ate it...boo!!

I am so sorry you are stressed out about your shower!!  It sounds like your sister is not making this easy for you!  But I can tell you that I was not in the least bit offended by the FB invitation, in fact I didn't even see it as coming from you because your sister's name is on it.  And I'm not just saying that! :-P  I can understand your frustration though that she did not send paper invites to your friends/family who are not on FB.  That would irritate me too!  

I was really nervous about my shower because I HATE being the center of attention...and also because I hadn't seen some of my friends/family in literally years and I didn't want anyone to think I was just being greedy by inviting them!  But I can tell you from the other side of things, I am SO stinkin' excited to come and share in your little miracle!! I am sooo excited for you!!  And I've only met you once!  So I know all your other friends and family are even more excited for you, regardless of method of invitation! 

I don't know if you feel this way or not, but I was also super stressed out from a PgAL perspective because my shower was just one more way of publicly acknowledging that we were having a baby...and in my head I still didn't believe that was actually going to happen!  It took me FORever to choose a shower date for this reason, and then I had a nervous breakdown the night before the shower...poor DH.  

And I completely understand about not knowing what to wear...I felt the same way.  You just get to a point where you don't feel like anything fits right or looks good anymore!  But your pictures say otherwise, you and your belly are SO cute!!  Just wear something comfortable (I know, that gets hard to find too, lol...) and it will be fine, I promise!  And if you decide to wear jeans, let me know and I will wear jeans too.  Actually, I'm not sure what other options I have right now either, lol! :-P

Take a deep breath...everything is going to be okay!  (((HUGS)))

(did someone say cookie?) 

MrsManning10

That really sucks!  Sorry you are getting stuck in the middle.  Hopefully it will all go together and be so much fun that it won't be an issue in the end!  And, I have seen your BPFs, and you look so cute and tiny!  Seriously!  Don't worry about what you wear... I'm sure you will look great!