Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

16+ Weeks/Late Loss Mothers

Hi Ladies,

First of all I want to say that you are all incredible---I lurk on this board and I am continually amazed at your strength and ability to support each other. 

I am currently 14 weeks pregnant.  Through an early genetic screen, they discovered a cystic hygroma in our baby.  Our CVS results came back with a normal karotype, so we are simply hoping for the best and expecting the worst.  Likely we will lose the baby in the next two months if a heart condition arises....as it usually does with babies who have cystic hygromas.  We still keep hoping we are in the tiny percentage of births that miraculously turn out normal, but I want to prepare just in case. 

So my question to you is this---when you went through the birthing process, what things did you do that you were really glad you did, and what things do you wish you did that you didn't do?  For example, if we face this experience, I would really like photos taken.  I have also heard that having a special blanket ready to take to the hospital for the baby is something that many mothers do...what other things are important to you?   I imagine the process happening quickly, so I want to be ready if this comes knocking on our door...

Thank you. 

Re: 16+ Weeks/Late Loss Mothers

  • I don't have a lot of advice to offer as we elected to have a d&e but I would think you would want to have pictures taken (I think Now I lay me down to sleep is the company that sends someone to take pictures, if you have that option in your area), a special blanket and/or outfit. If you get an outfit I would look online for a mirco preemie one so it isn't as huge. I would also take hand and foot prints.

    I am so sorry you have to go through this. I am praying for a miracle for you.
  • I had an early m/c so I have no advice for your situation, but I wanted to wish you and your baby well and I hope you never have to so through what you are thinking about now.  good luck
    image ~1500mg Metformin~M/C: 7 weeks~9/3/2008~D&C 9/16/2008
    Beta #1: 268 (16dpo) ~ Progesterone 54 ~ Beta #2: 541 (18dpo) Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • I responded to you above in great detail... I am so sorry you are going through this, but please know that there is hope.
  • I have not personally gone through this, but my best friend had a m/c earlier this month at 18 weeks.  They took pictures (someone from the hospital did it) and did hand/footprints.  That was about it because it was very sudden and unexpected.

    I will be thinking about you and I'm so sorry you have to go through this.
    Married 7.5.08
    BFP 12/10/10 - DD1 8/16/11
    BFP 10/29/13 - c/p 11/2/13
    BFP 11/29/13 - DD2 7/18/14
    BFP 3/20/18 - DS1 due 12/2/18
  • Hi, I am so sorry that you are going through this.  I hope that you don't lose your child but if you do I offer the below.

    My loss was sudden and not expected so we didn't get to plan.  I wish that we had a hand/foot print mold.  We are glad that we were able to see and hold our son.  Don't let them take him before you are ready to say goodbye.  Take as much time off of work and don't feel obligated to talk to people if you aren't ready.

    Good luck to you, I will keep your family in my thoughts.

    Baby Boy born still on March 10, 2008 at 21 wks 2 days : ( Finley Alyse born October 11, 2009 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Declan Jonathan born October 16, 2011 Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • A friend told me about your post and I just hope this can be helpful. I went through something similar. At our 12wk ultrasound, we discovered a very high NT measurement with a possible cystic hygroma. The CVS came back normal, but of course we knew there could still be something. All of the subsequent ultrasounds were normal and our baby boy is now an extremely healthy and happy four month old. I am so sorry you are going through such a difficult time, but maybe this will give you some hope. If you have any questions, please email me at [email protected].

  • I'm so, so sorry that you have to go through this.

    For me, I was glad I gave birth rather than having a c-section. I also treasure our photos, but wished we'd had more taken - we declined having photos of us holding them and I regret it more than anything. We didn't know when we went to the hospital that we'd be losing our babies, but if I had I would have wanted to bring something for them to wear, and a blanket. I wish we had held them longer. And I would definitely recommend making your own arrangements for burial/cremation, we had a lot of heartache from agreeing to let the hospital take care of things.

    You are in my thoughts and I will be hoping for the best for you and that you never have to consider these things.
    *** It's funny because I'm fat ***
  • Thank you so much ladies....your support, words of encouragement, and suggestions are beyond helpful.  I appreciate it more than you know.


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