Miscarriage/Pregnancy Loss

i'm back again

As much as i love you guys i never thought i would be back for the 3rd time!
Our loss was confirmed this past Friday, our baby had stopped developing at 5wks 2 days, i should have been 8 wks.
I though the innonce had been lost with the first loss, our 2nd being ectopic caught us off guard and there really was nothing to be done, but now another early loss  is beyond numbing.
I can't imagine ever being happy about seeing two lines ever again, how can i? if all i have ever gotten from those 2 lines is just sorrow?
This time we thought for sure was it, perfect betas, good progesterone, and then it was over.
I'm beyond broken at this point and i don't know how to make it through anymore.
We have decided to NOT TTC anymore for the year or at least until the fetal testing and RPL testing are done and give us some if any anwsers.
In the meantime i hope you guys don't mind me hanging around here since TTCAL isn't an option right now and forget SAL, don't get me wrong many of those ladies have been more than amazing, but seeing evryone one move on and i move backwards...well its too painful right now.
BFP #1 May 2000 ~ Darren was born Jan 13, 2001 ~ 6lbs 2oz 191/2" ~ 39 wks due to low fluid, otherwise perfect pregnancy
July 2004 abnormal pap, colposcopy and LEEP procedure ~ paps every 3 months all normal for 1 year
2006 all clear to start TTC
HSG Nov 2007 ~ all normal except mild left tube blockage
BFP #2 Dec 2007 EDD sept 3 ~ missed m/c ~ Feb 14 2008 ~ 9wk 2d D&C
BFP #3 Apr 2008 EDD Dec 10 ~ ectopic ~ May 2008 ~ 5wk 2d ~ emergency lap surgery, lost left tube
BFP #4 Jul 2008 EDD May 5 ~ missed m/c ~ Aug 2008 ~ 5wk 2d D&C - trisomy 16
RPL panel Aug 2008 ~ diagnosed with compound hetero MTHFR
BFP #5 Nov 2008 EDD Jul 31 ~ blighted Ovum ~ Dec 2008 ~ 4wk 3d ~ natural m/c at home for my birthday
BFP #6 Feb 2009 EDD Oct 15 ~ 4wk 3d ~ chemical pregnancy ~ Mar 2008
BFP #7 May 18 2009 ~ Gabriel Michael ~ Jan 19, 2010 ~ 7lbs 2oz 21"
TTC again since Jan 2011
BFP #8 Jun 2011 EDD Jan 20 ~ 5wk 6d ~ missed m/c ~ D&C
July - Hysterscopy removed some polyps, all clear for IUI with clomid
Aug-Oct - IUI - with Clomid all BFN
Nov-Jan - IUI - with femara and trigger = BFN
back to TTC naturally on our own hoping for another miracle.
CafeMom Tickers
CafeMom Tickers

Re: i'm back again

  • I am so sorry for all of your losses! 
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  • Hi Viv, sorry you are going through this again. I am currently going through my second miscarriage. I know how hopeless it feels. We are not sure about trying again either I want some answers before I do anything. Like you said it has been nothing but painful. I don't know how much more I can take. Be strong I know sometimes it is hard like right now when the pain is so real. I'm still in my pajamas and it's 5:30. I know I will get through it and so will you. Hugs
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  • I am so sorry.
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  • I'm so sorry to read about your loss... I can't even begin to imagine what it's like to lose 3 babies.  Of course you are welcome here.  Stick around as long as you want!  The support from women who have gone through what you have is powerful so stay as long as you need.  My thoughts will be with you....
    image ~1500mg Metformin~M/C: 7 weeks~9/3/2008~D&C 9/16/2008
    Beta #1: 268 (16dpo) ~ Progesterone 54 ~ Beta #2: 541 (18dpo) Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Oh gosh, your story breaks my heart. I don't know what to say other than I am so sorry and we are here for you.
  • Hey Viv...I am so sorry.  I was really hoping things would be different for you this time.  I will be having testing done this time too.  So we can go through this together.  I really am very sorry and will be here if you ever need to talk.
    7 mm/c
    APS, hetero factor v leiden & MTHFR
    bfp #1 - 12.11.07, edd 8.14.08, mm/c 1.21.08 (10w4d)
    bfp #2 - 4.4.08, edd 12.3.08, mm/c 5.14.08 (11w)
    bfp #3 - 8.3.08, edd 4.15.09, mm/c 9.17.08 (10w)
    bfp #4 - 1.15.09, edd 9.26.09, mm/c 2.16.09 (8w2d)
    bfp #5 - 6.16.09, edd 2.25.10, mm/c 7.23.09 (9w)
    bfp #6 - 8.12.10, edd 4.27.11, mm/c 9.16.10 (8w1d)
    one more try -> bfp #7 - 2.11, our miracle baby boy arrived 10.11
    ttc again -> bfp #8 - 5.3.13, edd 1.13.14, mm/c 5.30.13 (7w3d)
    bfp #9 - 9.23.13, our miracle baby girl arrived 5.29.14

  • Please post as much as you like here. I'm so sorry for all of your losses. I hope you can get some answers soon.
    Big, Big hugs to you.
  • I am so sorry you had to go through this again. It is not fair. I hope you get some answers. Big hugs.
  • I totally understand Vivian!! Please know I am so thinking about you and praying for you and your husband. I hope that your RPL testing will give you answers. I'm so sorry once again! All my love!!
    ~Jess & Mike May 12, 2007
    12.6.07 CP at 5w
    5.21.08 BO discovered at 7w, D&E at 8w3d
    8.31.08 CP at 4w5d
    BFP Sept 25, 2008 bfp buddy lkstor Landon born June 6, 2009
    3.25.11 missed m/c discovered at 9w6d, D&E at 10w2d
    4.28.11 MTHFR a1298c homozygous discovered
    4.2011 Began NaProTechnology
    10.12.11 Diagnosed with Type III Luteal Phase Defect
    10.2011 Starting hcg injections on 5, 7 & 9 dpo
    BFP 12.7.11 - EDD 8.14.12 - IT'S A BOY! Fruit Baby
    Life During and After RPL
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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