H left last night

vera1127

As soon as our last dinner guest had left he packed his bag and left. My mom is here to stay with me for a few nights. I am surprisingly okay. I'm admittedly more happy when he's not here. However, I was much happier when he was here and acted normal and not how he's acted lately.

Ugh...I hate that I'm here...

achase123

Sometimes being in limbo is the worst thing.  Then, when you finally decide to take some sort of action, either one way or the other, at least you stop wondering. 

I'm so sorry that you are going through this.  It's tough and you just have to let yourself feel the emotions.  It's a loss and a difficult one.  We are all here for you.

PrincessFiona9

I agree...being stuck in limbo is hard. I would take this time to decide what you want and tell him he can either go to counseling with you to work out his issues and re-commit to the marriage or he can hit the road Jack. I know I was much happier once DB was gone. I finally realized the NA etc that he was going to wasn't working because he didn't want to change or make things work. Everyone makes their own decisions. Like you said before, it's not fair for him to just walk out on his family "for a break."

vera1127

Well I've made the decision, unbeknownst to him, that I will give him 2 weeks. If he is still in limbo in 2 weeks he's out and I will get a legal separation. I think that if I promised to love him for better for worse I will do that, but I'm not going to sit around and wait for him to feel like coming back. I'm happy with my decision.

alibabbbs

I know that when my STBXH moved out, I felt a lot of relief, actually. I had no intention of ending the relationship, but I really noticed how much more peaceful my home was without him.

dimake

I think filing for legal separation is a great step...  my XH made lots of promises when he moved out about still supporting us, but once he started funneling his resources into his new life, he didn't have much left over.  I wish I'd filed sooner - he left in June and I didn't have an order for support until December (filed for divorce at the end of October).

vera1127

dimake:

I think filing for legal separation is a great step...  my XH made lots of promises when he moved out about still supporting us, but once he started funneling his resources into his new life, he didn't have much left over.  I wish I'd filed sooner - he left in June and I didn't have an order for support until December (filed for divorce at the end of October).

As much as it pains me, I know it's necessary. H is terrible with his money. He's been gone one night and has already used our card at the liquor store twice...$45 of this week's money into booze. He's not a big drinker, but it still ticks me off that I'm here finding the cheapest food at the store while he's downing Sam Adams with his buddies.